


Second Time Around

by Wayhaughtterthanthat



Category: Wynonna Earp (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Author Nicole, F/F, Friends to Lovers, Some angst, Traveling, Writer's Block, book tour, nicole is a writer, some smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-08
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-13 13:08:38
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 56,180
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29278971
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wayhaughtterthanthat/pseuds/Wayhaughtterthanthat
Summary: After publishing her second novel, Nicole is on a six week book tour with her publicist and her best friend, Waverly, to promote it. While she enjoys traveling and seeing new places, she’s also trying to juggle writing the final book of the trilogy, keeping her personal life under wraps to the public and the unexpected feelings that might be beginning to develop for her best friend.
Relationships: Waverly Earp/Nicole Haught
Comments: 104
Kudos: 417





	1. The West

**Author's Note:**

> Hey! This is something I’ve had in the works for over a year and finally feel like I’m in a good place with it to start posting it. Writing has been tough for me lately, but I’ve been trying to get back into it so I hope you enjoy!

A limo pulls up outside the hotel, rolling to a stop. It’s dark and the air is crisp. Nicole is tired, but she knows this is the last event of the book tour. One last night to put on a show before things can finally calm down, as if that’s actually going to happen. The past six weeks have been a whirlwind, but extremely life changing.

She hasn’t been home in that time, not that she misses it too much. Going home means facing what she’d rather just forget. Going home means truly facing the end of her marriage, deadlines and even more harassment from her publicist to continue to produce the final installment of the three part book series she started. 

Book number two of the ‘Sky of a Million Stars’ trilogy has been out for less than six months and she’s spent the last month and a half on tour promoting it. It’s not the only book signing event that she’s attended, however, it was her first full tour. Twenty-four stops later and all she can think about is that she’s probably going to have to do this again in the future.

Writing the third book hasn’t come easy to her by any means thus far. With her publicist breathing down her neck, it sure doesn’t make it any easier. Writing used to be fun for Nicole. It was an outlet. Now it’s work. She still loves it though, even if it doesn’t always come so easily. 

Having Waverly helps. Nicole hired her as her handler for the tour. It was her way of keeping a small piece of home close by while she was gone. They’ve been friends since they were five. As far back as Nicole can remember, she’s always been one of her biggest support systems, besides her wife, but that hasn’t really been the same lately. 

They got married fairly young. There wasn’t much room to think about the fact that marriage is usually forever when they met in Vegas a few summers ago. She was pretty, she knew just what to say to sweep Nicole off her feet. Especially after Britney live, a big win on a slot machine and a bunch of cocktails later. 

She’s alone outside the hotel. It’s the first time all tour other than when she was sleeping in her hotel room that she hasn’t had someone with her. She was surprised that her publicist didn’t force her to have a “chaperone” while she got ready for the event. She was probably afraid to leave her alone with Waverly after everything that has happened. Hell, even she is a little nervous about being alone with her right now. They were hungry and Nicole wasn’t, so she convinced them she would survive for an hour while they went out for food. 

The driver exits the vehicle and makes his way around to the side door. Nicole thanks the man when he opens the door for her to climb in. She takes in one more deep breath of fresh air before ducking down to step inside. She notices there’s only one other person in the limousine with her. She gives her a slightly puzzled look. 

“Waves? Where’s Rosita?” she asks the brunette who’s greeting her with a smile. Her heart thumps so hard in her chest that it’s practically in her throat.

“She said she’ll meet us there,” Waverly says.

Nicole shrugs and takes a seat across from the woman who is sitting in the middle of one of the seats. The driver closes the door and makes his way back to the front. She glances behind her to see the privacy screen is closed, leaving her completely alone with the brunette in the back. 

She feels the vehicle jossle a bit as it starts to move, heading down the street to their destination. 

One last party that Nicole has to attend. 

One last show she has to put on. 

She takes a moment to look at the woman sitting in front of her. She’s dressed in a short, tightly fitted dress. It’s patterned, but not tacky. There’s lace, but it’s still simple. It’s beautiful. 

She’s beautiful.

Her eye’s travel down the brunette’s legs to the exposed skin that she can just barely make out in the darkness of the limo. The moon shines bright in the sky above them, but the tinted windows don’t allow it much access inside the vehicle. She can tell by the angle of the woman’s legs that she’s wearing a pair of heels, something that only happens on rare occasions. 

“You okay?” Waverly asks. Nicole takes her time bringing her eyes back up to her face. She gets caught up in her smile for a moment, then nods. 

“Perfect,” she says, offering a soft smile back to the brunette. 

As much as she’s ready to move on from the tour, there are things from her time traveling she doesn’t want to end. She hasn’t always been able to be alone with the brunette when she wanted throughout the tour, but every moment she has is engraved in her mind. 

The very first signing of the tour when Waverly held her hand behind the curtain as she peered out to see the size of the crowd for the first time in Seattle. 

The night on the balcony of the hotel outside of New Orleans.

The night they shared together earlier in the week. 

She feels the brunette’s fingers brush lightly against her left hand as she lifts it from Nicole’s side. She pulls it a little closer to her. Nicole doesn’t mind the contact. She watches as Waverly carefully studies her hand, she stares more specifically her ring finger. She slowly lifts her head, catching Waverly’s eyes on the way up.

“You took it off,” she says, softly running her thumb over where Nicole’s wedding band once was.

“I can’t keep doing it,” Nicole admits.  
  
Waverly’s hazel eyes meet hers. She doesn’t speak. 

**_Six weeks earlier._ **

“You sure you have everything?” a dark haired woman asks as she picks up one of Nicole’s bags off her floor and carries it out to the car in the driveway. 

“Rosita,” Nicole sighs. “This isn’t my first time traveling,” she reminds her. It is, however, the first major book tour she’s ever been on and although she’s nervous, apparently her publicist is even more nervous. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Rosita huffs. “I’m just trying to make sure we’re prepared for this, Nicole,” she says. 

“That’s why I’m bringing Waverly,” Nicole says with a grin. She glances over at the brunette woman who is reading over a list that is probably full of everything that they need and everything they already have. “She’s on top of it, right Waves?” she calls out to her. 

Waverly glances up from her list. “Huh?” she asks.

“Do we have everything we need?” Nicole asks. “Rosita is freaking out over here,” she teases, gesturing Rosita with her thumb.

Waverly laughs and nods. “We’re on top of it,” Waverly reassures them, waving the list in the air.

“See?” Nicole asks, grinning back at her publicist.

Rosita shakes her head at the redhead. 

Part of the reason she hired Waverly to go on tour with her is because of her excellent organization skills. The other part is because Waverly is one of her best friends and she doesn’t trust many other people to do what she needs her to do. 

“Okay,” Rosita says. She’s trying to stay calm and focused. She’s clearly not entertained by the redhead’s sarcastic retorts. 

It’s not long before another car pulls into the driveway next to them. Nicole pauses for a moment. Despite the separation from her wife, they’ve still been residing in the same home. Most of the time, it’s not a big issue since they have vastly different schedules.

To be honest, Shae isn’t home much at all anymore. Nicole knows that between late nights at the hospital and finishing up her school, she’s busy, but she never really asks where else she might be. She’s not sure if she really wants to know.

Shae climbs out of the car, donning a pair of light blue scrubs and dark circles under her eyes indicating that it was probably a long night at the hospital. The redhead greets her with a soft smile. Even though they’re in the process of a divorce, it doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about the woman.

“Takin’ off?” Shae asks Nicole as she makes her way over to the three women who are standing together on the other side of the driveway.

Nicole nods and gestures to Shae, to walk with her away from where Waverly and Rosita are standing. 

“Hey, so Rosita doesn’t think I should mention the divorce yet,” she tells her when they’re far enough away for her to know they’re alone. “She thinks a major change in my personal life would take away from trying to shine a spotlight on my next book.”

“And you’re okay with that?” Shae asks.

She’s always been a caring person. They may not have always been great about communication, but they did care about each other in one way or another. 

Nicole shrugs. Shae places her hand on the redhead’s shoulder and offers her a small smile.

“I, uh, just wanted to keep you in the loop, you know?” Nicole informs her. 

Shae nods. “Thanks,” she says, dropping her hand back down to her own side. “Just don’t stop being true to yourself because of an image someone wants to uphold you for.”

Nicole pushes for a moment, looking into the soft, brown eyes of her soon to be ex wife. The words hit deep, but she tries not to show it. She blinks a few times, getting her thoughts together.

“When I get back, we can get the rest of this whole thing situated,” Nicole tells her. “Just gotta get through the next six weeks,” she says with a bit of a forced smile.

“You’ll have fun,” Shae says with a soft smile.

Nicole agrees. As nervous as she is to put herself out there for this book tour, she is excited to be able to travel with her best friend and promote something she poured her heart and soul into for so long.

“And you’ll have Waverly by your side,” Shae says, nudging her playfully, giving her a wink. 

Nicole isn’t sure what she means by that, but it does make her feel a lot better to know she’ll have her best friend with her. 

They don’t talk about much else before they rejoin the other two women on the other side of the driveway. They go over everything again, briefly, making sure they have everything they need again. It’s mostly for Rosita’s peace of mind. They say their goodbyes to Shae before climbing in the vehicle to head to the airport.

Nicole watches as Waverly takes a moment to give Shae a hug goodbye. Waverly and Shae have gotten pretty close over the last few years and she’s sure it will be weird for them not to spend time together much anymore either.

“Take care of her,” she hears Shae whisper to the brunette as they pull away from the hug.

“Always,” Waverly says with a smile. Nicole climbs in the backseat of the car, allowing Waverly to take the front. As they slowly back out of the driveway, she glances back up at her wife once more, waving goodbye at her before she fades from her sight. 

📖 

The first flight of the trip is only a couple of hours, but Nicole’s nerves make it feel much longer. She’s never been much for flying and she really appreciates Waverly trying to spend most of the flight keeping her distracted. 

“Want to play ‘I spy?’” Waverly whispers as she leans over toward Nicole’s ear. 

Nicole laughs and gives her a look. “Like when we were ten?” 

Nearly fifteen years ago, their family’s decided they were going to surprise the kids and go on a trip to Disney World. That’s when Nicole realized she wasn’t so keen on the whole flying thing. The flight was mostly spent with Waverly’s older sister, Wynonna, making fun of her for being a ‘baby,’ but Waverly was supportive, even then. 

“Hey,” Waverly says. “It helped, didn’t it?” She asks with a smile.

Nicole thinks back to the moment and nods. “Yeah, except we ran out of things to spy because when you’re short and in the middle seat, there’s not much you can see,” Nicole laughs. She glances over at Waverly, sitting in the middle seat again, trying to look in between the seats and laughs. 

“Okay, so some things haven’t changed,” Waverly laughs, looking back at Nicole. 

“How about we play writing on an airplane?” The sound of Rosita’s voice comes from the other side of Waverly.

Nicole groans and dramatically slams the back of her head against the seat behind her. She doesn’t turn to look at the woman, but she can feel her eyes on her. She desperately wants Waverly to move forward, blocking Rosita from her sight, but she doesn’t ask. 

She knows she should be writing. Rosita doesn’t exactly let her forget about it either. Honesty, she hasn’t looked at her computer in over a week. That might not seem like too much time, but with a deadline bearing down on her, it feels like it’s been years. 

She thought maybe the idea of promoting her newest book would give her some inspiration to write again, but so far she’s had no such luck. She knows she’s going to get questions asking about the next book, and she really wishes she had answers. 

Truthfully, the end of her marriage hasn’t really helped to get the inspiration train running either. She’s feeling better about the entire situation than she thought she would, but it has still kept her mind a little preoccupied. 

“What’s on your mind?” Waverly’s voice breaks her from her thoughts. It’s soft and low, almost like a whisper. 

Nicole turns her head to see the brunette looking back at her. She shakes her head.

“Nothing.” 

She knows Waverly is fully aware that she’s not telling her the truth, something the brunette has always been good at. The brunette gives her a look. 

“I’m fine, Waves,” Nicole assures her. “I’m just thinking.” 

Waverly pauses for a moment. She’s not usually one to ask the same question over and over, especially when Nicole is resistant to talking about it. However, she’s good at getting Nicole talking.

“Do you remember the first time you told me you wanted to be a writer?” Waverly asks.

Nicole turns her head towards the brunette. “Like when I came to you with a bunch of scattered pages of writing and told you I swear I could make a story out of it?” 

“That too,” Waverly says with a laugh. “But I mean when we were younger. You wrote an essay for class and you were so excited about it,” she continues. “You were never excited about school.”

Nicole gives her a slightly embarrassed look. She remembers her classmates making fun of her for actually caring so much about how perfect it was. “What about it?” She asks. 

“I remember how determined you were,” Waverly says. “You wrote so many stories after that and I remember being amazed by your creativity,” she says. 

“Oh man, I was hoping you forgot about some of those stories,” Nicole says with a laugh. 

“My point is,” Waverly continues. “When you were stuck on something, or frustrated, you never actually stopped writing,” she says. “You would just jot down other ideas that you could come back to. You always used to tell me, ‘as long as I write something, I feel like I’m going in the right direction.’ Remember that?” 

Nicole nods. 

She was right. 

She’s always right. 

Maybe she should try just writing. Writing anything is better than writing nothing, right? She smiles back at the brunette. 

“Thanks,” Nicole says. “This is why I brought you, because you’re the calm one,” she says with a laugh, receiving a glare from Rosita. 

“And I thought it was because you don’t trust anyone else to be your handler,” Waverly teases. 

“That too,” Nicole says with a laugh, pointing a finger toward the brunette. 

📖 

Nicole spends the majority of the rest of the plane ride staring at her unopened laptop. Waverly’s words of encouragement repeat in her head, but there’s something in her still stopping her from even opening the computer to start. 

It’s possibly the thought of taking the time to open the computer and not having any actual ideas to write about. Or it could be the thought of staring at a blank page, a clean slate, something Nicole fears more than she realizes. 

When the plane lands and they receive the go ahead to depart the aircraft, Rosita leads the way to baggage claim. It doesn’t take long for their luggage to appear on the conveyor belt. They collect their bags and make their way out of the airport to meet their car that is set to bring them to their hotel for the night. 

By the time they’ve reached the hotel, Nicole feels the exhaustion from traveling all day finally setting in and is grateful when Rosita and Waverly leave her alone in her room for the night. 

She lays down in the bed in her hotel room. It’s much more comfortable than her bed at home. It probably has something to do with the fact that she spends most nights sleeping on the couch, that is until Shae tells her to stop doing that so she doesn’t wake her up when she comes home in the middle of the night. Then she ends up sleeping in the guest room, where the bed is not nearly as comfortable. She’s not sure why she doesn’t just sleep in her room. Shae sleeps at the hospital more often than not anyway. 

She picks up her phone to check her messages. She has a few from her parents, telling her that they hope she has a good time on tour. Part of her is disappointed when she doesn’t have any messages from Shae. She’s not sure why she would expect it, but it’s the first big event she’s had since their marriage ended and part of her still wants to do this with her. 

She types out a text to her a few times before deleting every one. She finally decides to just send her a text letting her know they’ve landed and made it to the hotel. She feels like she at least owes her that, not wanting her to worry. She sends the text and locks her phone, setting it down on the nightstand next to her. 

She rolls over, eyes locking on her computer bag for a moment. The computer inside briefly taunts her and she turns over in the other direction so she no longer has to look at it. She pulls a pillow close to her chest, missing human contact.

There’s something about being alone in a new city that makes her wish she had someone to experience it with. Not that she is completely alone, she did have Rosita and Waverly with her, but she doesn’t really see either of them jumping in her bed to keep her company, at least not in the way she wants.

Her phone vibrates on the nightstand, causing her to reach out to grab it. She expects it to be a text from Shae, but instead it’s Waverly asking her if she needs anything before the brunette goes to bed. Nicole smiles at the notion. She's grateful to have Waverly on tour with her, easing her nerves a little. 

She tells her she’s all set and that she hopes she sleeps well before she sets her phone back down, attempting to get some sleep herself. 

📖 

The next morning comes and Nicole is excited to get started on her book tour. She doesn’t fully know exactly what to expect, but she trusts that her team has it under control. 

Waverly is at her door, bright and early, cheery as can be. She answers the door, letting the brunette into her room. 

“Sorry,” Nicole says as she makes her way back into the bathroom, finishing getting ready. “I feel like I’m running slow this morning,” she calls out. “But I’m excited to get the day started!”

“That’s fine,” Waverly assures her. “You know me, I’m always up early.” 

Nicole laughs from the bathroom. 

Waverly being early is an understatement. That woman is always prepared no matter what. She consistently has everything all planned out, much more than Nicole. She envies that about the brunette.

Nicole exits the bathroom after she’s done getting ready. She finally realizes Waverly brought her a coffee to the room. A thankful smile grows on her lips as she takes one of the warm cups of coffee into her hands. 

“You’re amazing,” Nicole sighs as she takes a sip of coffee, feeling the warm liquid flowing smoothly down her throat. 

“I know,” Waverly says with a shrug and a smile. Nicole laughs and shakes her head at her best friend. 

After a few minutes of Nicole making sure she’s fully ready for the first signing, the pair make their way out of the hotel room in search of Rosita. 

The bookstore is set up for the signing when they arrive. There’s a table with a dark blue table cloth set up on one end of the store. The top is covered wit a couple of stacks of Nicole’s books, some promotional bookmarks, and a few markers for signing. There are a few chairs at the table, one in the middle for Nicole to sit at. 

On the front of the table, there is a banner with Nicole’s name on it and an image of the cover of the book she’s promoting. The store is quiet at first, but the silence doesn’t last long when the store opens the doors for the crowd of people waiting to enter. 

Nicole is tucked behind a curtain that isn’t too far being the table set up for her signing. When the people settle into the space provided, Rosita and the owner of the bookstore make their way into the open space, standing near the signing table. 

She hears the bookstore owner begin to speak to the crowd, quickly silencing the people’s low chatter. Nicole is impressed with how quickly the room falls silent again. She moves her hand to her stomach when she feels the nerves begin to build again.

She takes a deep breath in through her nose, holding it for a moment. She lifts her hand to peel back the curtain, only slightly, to peek out at the crowd in the room. The noise of everyone talking before was enough to make her nervous, but seeing exactly how many people were really out there made it worse. 

Much, much worse. 

She doesn’t realize how long she’s been holding her breath, when she feels someone take her hand in their own. She looks to her side to see Waverly smiling back at her. She looks further down at their hands that are linked together. She feels the brunette squeeze her hand a little harder.

“You got this,” she says with another smile. 

Nicole lets out the breath, relaxing a bit more. She smiles back at her friend, telling her, “thank you.”

She closes the curtain and waits to get the final directions as she is introduced out into the signing. Waverly doesn’t let go over her hand until the very last second before she makes her way out toward the crowd. 

Everyone claps as she makes her way out from behind the curtain, finding her seat at the table. As she takes her seat, she calls out, “good morning, Seattle!” The crowd cheers again, causing a huge grin to appear on her face. She feels like a rockstar for a moment.

The next few hours fly by faster than she could ever imagine. She starts by introducing her book, giving an overview, reading a few excerpts from her book and answering questions. She signs several books, shakes several hands and talks to more people than she can even take note of. By the time the last person makes it to her table, her adrenaline is running high. She feels like she’s on top of the world. 

“You look like you’re on cloud nine,” Waverly says as she leans in towards the redhead.

Nicole smiles and turns toward her, so happy to have her by her side. “That was pretty awesome,” she says with a grin. 

She knows it’s just the first of many signings she’s about to have over the next several weeks, but she definitely feels a lot better and a lot less nervous. 

Nicole insists on a trip out to the bar that night and is surprised when Rosita doesn’t argue with her about it. She’s usually more uptight about Nicole's casual public appearances, but she definitely doesn’t plan on spending the entire tour couped up in hotel rooms. 

They settle on a small, local bar just outside of the city. It was a suggestion from the owner of the bookstore that Nicole convinced to join them as well. 

Nicole buys the first round of drinks for the group. As the bartender slides the drinks toward them, she gestures for them to wait before they take the first sip. 

“A toast,” she calls out, causing the group to become quiet. “To an incredible first day,” she continues. “I just want to thank my amazing publicist and my best friend,” she gestures to Rosita, then Waverly. “None if this would be possible without either of you.”

She takes a moment to scan the faces that are looking back at her. They’re all smiling, causing her to smile bigger than she was before. 

“Here’s to continuing to have a great tour and to all the adventures we’re about to have over the next several weeks.”

She raises the glass a little higher, clinking it against the nearest glass to her’s. The rest of the group clinks their glasses against each other’s and they all take a drink. 

The night continues on with a few more rounds of drinks. Nicole excuses herself to the bathroom and notices she has a missed call and a voicemail on her phone. She quickly dips outside before Rosita can stop her to listen to the voicemail. It’s from Shae, asking about how her first day went. She tells her that she’s going to be working late so she probably wouldn’t have any time to talk but she wanted her to know she was thinking about her. 

Nicole is hit with so many mixed emotions for a moment. She’s unsure if she’s suddenly missing her marriage with Shae, if she still feels something for the other woman, or maybe she’s just missing the idea of having someone by her side again. 

She rubs her face with her hand, suddenly craving another drink. She pushes her thoughts of possibly missing her marriage aside by thinking about all of the times Shae worked late when they were together. She thinks about how empty it felt at times when she wasn’t around. She thinks about how they talked less and less until they were basically just coexisting together in their home. 

She hears a familiar voice nearby and looks up to see Waverly on the phone on the side of the building. She makes brief eye contact with the brunette, receiving a soft smile and her index finger in the air, indicating that she’ll just be another moment. Nicole nods and decides to head back in the bar before Rosita sends the search dogs out for her. 

“Tell her I said hi and that I miss her,” Nicole hears Waverly say into the phone before she makes her way back into the bar. 

“Thought I was going to have to come looking for you,” Rosita with a smirk when Nicole returns to her side.

“I can handle going to the bathroom by myself, Rosie,” Nicole huffs. 

She appreciates how seriously Rosita takes her job, but sometimes she really acts like an overbearing mother, and Nicole just got to the point where her own mother stops acting like that. 

“Just want to keep you safe,” Rosita reminds her. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Nicole says.

She leans over the bar a little, gaining the bartender's attention. She’s young and really pretty, Nicole can’t help but notice.

“Hey, can I get two more of these?” She asks, giving the woman a quick wink just before she turns around. 

She sees her blush a little as she nods and begins to pour her drinks. The bartender slides the glasses toward the redhead. Nicole takes a five dollar bill from her pocket, sliding it toward the bartender. Their fingers brush as the woman takes it from her grasp. Nicole flashes a dimpled smile before turning her head to the left, receiving a warning look from Rosita. Nicole rolls her eyes at her publicist and turns to ignore her. 

Waverly returns to the bar a moment later and Nicole lets out an audible sigh like she’s now protected from being lectured by Rosita. 

“For you,” Nicole says, handing the brunette one of the drinks she just ordered. Waverly takes the drink, but gives her a weird look. 

“Nicole, you already bought a round of drinks, I am getting paid here, I can pay too,” Waverly reminds her.

“I know,” Nicole reassures her. “But it’s a thank you.” Waverly gives her a confused look. “For being there for me earlier,” Nicole continues. “For stopping me from having a breakdown before the signing. And for just being here in general,” she says with a smile. “I’m not sure I could do any of this without you.” 

Waverly smiles back at her. She lifts the glass in the air in front of her, slightly.

“To Nicole Haught,” she says. 

“I think you mean to Waverly Earp,” Nicole corrects her, lifting her own glass now in the air, just a little higher than Waverly’s. 

“To almost twenty years of friendship,” Waverly says with a smile. 

“Oh man,” Nicole says. “To being old!” She laughs, causing the brunette to laugh. 

“Nah,” Waverly shrugs. “It’s just the beginning,” she reminds her. 

“To the beginning,” Nicole says with a wink. “But really,” she says. “Cheers to you,” she says as she clinks her glass against Waverly’s.

Waverly smiles as she nods and brings the glass to her lips to take a sip. “Thank you,” she says to Nicole, causing the redhead to smile again. 

“So, how’s your sister?” Nicole asks as she places the glass down on the bar in front of her.

“How’d you know I was talking to my sister?” Waverly asks.

Nicole laughs to herself at the thought that Waverly doesn’t know how much she actually knows her. Nicole doesn’t answer, she just gives the brunette a look.

“She’s fine,” Waverly says with a laugh. “I miss Alice,” she admits. 

“Me too,” Nicole says, softly. 

She realizes she’s taking the brunette away from her sister for a month and a half. And while Waverly won’t admit it, Nicole knows it’s hard on her, especially with her three year old niece at home. Nicole has to admit, she has a soft spot for that little girl as well. 

“Wynonna says ‘hi,’ by the way,” Waverly tells her as she takes another sip of her drink. Nicole pauses for a moment, knowing there is probably more to that statement. “Well, actually, she says ‘sup, Haughty with a body,” she says with an eye roll. 

Nicole can’t help but laugh. While her friendship with Waverly has always been extremely close, she’s always had a bond with the brunette’s older sister as well. Their friendship is more of an ‘acquired taste,’ as she likes to call it, but it works for them. Waverly definitely doesn’t find them as funny as they do though. 

The rest of the night goes by quickly. They have a couple more drinks before they call it quits and head back to the hotel. By the time she lays down in bed, she feels the room start to spin. She blames it on finally coming down from the high she’s been feeling most of the day, but she knows in reality it’s because of the alcohol. 

She scrolls through her phone a little bit. She remembers that Shae left her a voicemail and listens to it again. She feels bad for not calling her back, but she knows the other woman made it clear that she probably doesn’t have time to talk. 

She settles on sending her a text. It’s short and sweet, telling her that her day was amazing. She wishes Shae well, something she’s always done, regardless of what they’re going through. They may not be a they forever, but she would never want anything bad to happen to Shae either. 

After hitting send, she doesn’t wait for a possible reply. She’s admittedly too tired and a little too drunk to have much of a conversation anyway. She locks her phone screen and sets it down on the nightstand next to her before rolling over in the bed. 

She pulls the extra pillow close to her body, suddenly missing the warm embrace of another body sleeping next to her. It takes her a few minutes to get comfortable in the bed that night, but when she does, she falls right to sleep. 

📖 

As the week continues, Nicole is still excited about the tour with every stop they make. They travel to a few small towns in between each big city, which she likes. She says it’s nice to get a feel of different places across the country, not just the major cities. 

While they’re in the smaller towns, she usually likes to hit up some local places to eat, find coffee, or sometimes have a drink to celebrate another successful signing. She’s surprised when she sees the turnout at some of the signings at the smaller bookstores feel just as big as the larger ones. 

📖 

The next major stop on the tour is Portland, Oregon. Nicole can tell that Waverly is excited about this stop the most. She doesn’t stop talking about the culture, the scenery or the visits she wants to take to the art galleries when they have free time. Nicole groans internally at the thought, but she knows, in reality, she will be tagging along with her anyway. 

They have a free day when they arrive in the city and Waverly takes full advantage of being a tourist as soon as she can. Nicole is in her hotel room, setting her computer bag on the desk in the corner as if she’s actually going to sit down to write. 

She was hoping the tour would inspire something, anything, but so far she hasn’t found that. She loves seeing people get excited about the book series thus far and the questions have begun to role in about the third book. 

The questions aren’t so much about when it’s going to be done, after all, they don’t know that she hasn’t written yet. They ask questions about the relationships between the characters of the books. They question the direction the story might go in. Nicole diverts most questions with wanting to keep some mystery in the story. Little to do they know, it’s a mystery to her as well. 

There’s a knock at her door that she appreciates more than the person on the other side realizes. Even if it’s Rosita, she’ll take any distraction she can right now. She opens the door to see a bubbly Waverly on the other side. 

“You’re like a breath of fresh air,” she says. 

Waverly gives her a puzzled look. Nicole holds the door open further, gesturing for the brunette to come in. 

“Still no luck on the writing?” Waverly asks, eyes locked on the unopened laptop case.

Nicole grunts and plops down onto the bed, shaking her head at her friend. Waverly gives her a sympathetic look and sits down next to her, placing her hand on the redhead’s thigh. 

“I know just what you need.” 

Nicole looks back at her, confused. “What’s that?” 

“I found this really cool art gallery just down the road,” the brunette says as she pulls a trifold brochure that she clearly found in the tourist section of the hotel lobby out of her back pocket.

Nicole can’t help but laugh. Waverly is never one to manipulate a situation to get what she wants, but when she’s passionate about something, she really sets her mind to it. 

“That’s going to help me write?” Nicole challenges. 

“You never know where you’ll find inspiration!” 

Waverly nudges her in the ribs with her elbow. Nicole lets out an audible sigh. She knows she’s not going to win this battle. The way she thinks of it, she has two options. She can sit alone in her hotel room, pretending like she’s about to write her next best selling novel, or she can follow Waverly around to art galleries all day. 

“Let’s go,” Nicole says, trying to sound as enthusiastic as she possibly can. It’s not that she doesn’t appreciate art, but standing quietly staring at something hanging on a wall isn’t exactly the best way for her to escape her thoughts. 

Waverly squeals and jumps up from her spot on the bed. Nicole can’t help but laugh as she exudes excitement about their day ahead. 

It’s not long before she’s being dragged out of the hotel room and into the streets of Portland. Nicole does admit that the city is beautiful. She takes in the sights around her, completely enthralled in the atmosphere. It's the best part of being able to travel for the tour. 

The art galleries aren’t as bad as Nicole told herself they were going to be. She actually found herself gawking at some of the art as well, hoping that maybe it would bring some sort of inspiration to her to write. 

By the second gallery, she begins to realize that Waverly doesn’t really have a plan to call it quits for the day or even to eat for that matter. She feels a slight growl in her stomach, realizing the lukewarm cup of coffee she had from the hotel lobby is no longer cutting it. 

She notices Waverly must have turned another corner in the building, leaving her behind with the art that they were just looking at together. She goes on a search for the brunette. It doesn’t last long, ending with finding the other woman gazing thoughtfully at a small statue displayed on a pedestal in the middle of the mostly empty room. 

She stops for a moment to take in the sight, not necessarily of the statue, but of the petite, brunette woman, currently in awe of something so small, so simple, yet so complicated at the same time. She’s in her own world, Nicole isn’t sure if she even notices when she enters the room. 

Nicole doesn’t speak at first. She allows Waverly time, making her way around the piece of art, carefully studying every visible inch. The smile Nicole gives her goes unnoticed, but she doesn’t mind. She’s always in awe of how patient and appreciative Waverly is of the things she cares about, herself included.

When the brunette finally looks up, she is donning a smile from ear to ear. 

“What did you find?” Nicole asks as she makes her way over to the brunette.

“It’s beautiful, isn’t it?” 

Nicole finally looks down at the statue that Waverly is looking at. It’s small, and not very detailed. She never really understood abstract art. She blames it on being a writer and being more about describing details to paint a vivid picture. This is more up for interpretation and she’s afraid to make an assumption of what it is in fear that she is way off.

“It’s… neat.” 

“Neat? Geez, Nicole, you could at least pretend,” Waverly huffs. 

Nicole laughs. “When have you ever known me to ever be into this kind of thing?” 

“You have a point.” 

“Take me the way I am, Waves, or don’t take me at all.” 

“Okay, don’t be dramatic,” Waverly laughs, rolling her eyes at the redhead. “Are you ready for the next stop?” 

“Does it involve food?” Nicole asks, holding her growling stomach with her hand. 

“It could,” Waverly tells her. 

Nicole doesn’t stick around to allow the brunette to have any other idea than finding something to eat. She quickly leads Waverly outside, but finds herself following the brunette as they make their way down the street. 

As they continue on their way, Nicole looks down to check her phone. She has a few text messages from her family and one from Shae. She doesn’t respond yet. She reads the messages and tucks the phone back into her pocket. 

The rumble in her stomach becomes louder and she covers it briefly with her hand. She looks up to see that they haven’t made their way to a restaurant, but yet another art gallery. She gives Waverly a look, only to receive a pouty lip in return.

“Man, I wish you wanted to go to a sports game or something, at least they have food there!” Nicole whines. Waverly practically has her by the arm as she drags her into the third gallery of the day. “I’m starving and we’ve already seen two other galleries today, how different can this one be?” 

Waverly stops in her tracks, eyes widening at her best friend. “I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that,” she huffs. “Listen, you promised me we get to do some of the things I want to do while we’re gone and you know how excited I was about Portland!” Nicole dramatically groans again, throwing her head back. “It won’t be long, it’s small. We can get food right after, I promise.” 

“Good thing Portland is early in the list then, we can get it over with,” she mumbles under her breath.

Waverly turns to her, giving her a warning look. “What was that?” she asks. “You want me to find art galleries in every stop?” 

Nicole quickly shakes her head. 

“That is for sure not what I said,” she assures her.

Waverly laughs and leads the way into what Nicole hopes to be the last gallery of the day. 

Nicole spends most of the time following Waverly around and trying to figure out what half of the paintings are. It’s not that she doesn’t appreciate art, it’s definitely not something she could ever do, but she doesn't find much thrill out of spend’s her days starting at it. 

“Now look at this one,” Waverly says, gesturing toward one of the paintings on the wall. “What do you see? How does it make you feel?” she asks. 

Nicole squints her eyes a little as she stares at the painting. She sees an array of colors, splattered around on the canvas. There doesn’t appear to be any clear shapes or patterns. It doesn’t even seem like any of the marks were deliberate, which she’s sure they actually were. The colors are bright, but dark at the same time. It appears to have several layers, causing her eyes to move quickly from on spot to another, never actually landing on one specific area. 

After a moment of trying to analyze the painting in front of her she turns to see Waverly watching her as she stares at the painting. She wonders what the brunette is thinking. She’s sure it’s something along the lines of thinking it’s funny to see the wheels turning in Nicole’s head so hard that there’s probably steam coming out of her ears. Waverly reaches out and touches her forearm as if she’s giving her permission to stop trying to figure it out. 

“It just looks like chaos,” Nicole says with a shrug. Waverly laughs. “I just don’t get the whole abstract thing, like shouldn’t it be images of actual objects?” she asks. “It would just make so much more sense!” 

Waverly laughs and shakes her head at the redhead as she starts to move on to another painting. “That’s the point of abstract,” she explains. “It makes it up for interpretation.”

“But doesn’t the artist have something in mind when they’re painting it?” Nicole asks, following behind the brunette. “Or is it just random?”

“It’s not random,” Waverly explains. “But each viewer usually sees something different than the next,” she says. 

Nicole nods. She gets it, but still doesn’t at the same time. As they pass the painting she was just studying, she glances at the small plaque on the wall with the title and artist’s name on it. The title simple reads, ‘Chaos,’ and Nicole chuckles to herself before moving on to the next painting with her friend. 

📖 

As the stops continue, Nicole is more and more surprised about the turnout at each bookstore. Waverly often asks her why she’s so surprised that people would read her book. It’s not even the fact that they want to read her book, lots of people read books, but it’s more of the fact that they want to come meet her. She’s not a celebrity, she’s just...Nicole. 

She continues to enjoy the time sightseeing in between each signing. Waverly still tries to get her to become more “cultured” as she puts it, but Nicole feels that she’s plenty cultured. 

“Yeah, you’re so cultured,” Waverly says, sarcastically.

“How much more cultured can you get than being a small town girl who writes fictional stories about things I’ve never done?” Nicole retorsts, smirking at her best friend. 

Waverly rolls her eyes at the redhead, shaking her head. “This is the most you’ve traveled in your entire life, don’t you want to take advantage of it?”

“I’m taking full advantage of it!” Nicole argues. “I could be sitting in my hotel room, writing,” she teases, giving Rosita a look to see her reaction. 

“If only you cared about your career,” Rosita says.

Nicole's eyes widen at the comment, but she can’t help but laugh off Rosita’s seriousness.

“Looks like I’m not the only one who needs to be cultured,” Nicole teases, giving Waverly a quick wink.

The brunette stifles her laugh, pursing her lips to avoid letting it show that she’s entertained by Nicole’s jokes.

📖 

Just over a week into the tour, they land in San Francisco, a city Nicole is excited to explore. She spends most of the trip there discussing sightseeing that she wants to do. She’s happy to hear Waverly is on the same page with her at this stop. Even Rosita looks forward to joining them, but reminds her that the main reason they’re there is for the book signing. Nicole tells her that she knows, and continues making plans until they reach their destination. 

The day is busy, but Nicole feels relaxed as they take on the sights at their own pace. No one is in a rush or seems to have a specific agenda. It might possibly be one of her favorite days of the tour thus far. 

After their day of sightseeing, they go back to their hotel rooms to get ready for dinner that night. They had plans to go on a dinner boat in the bay, to do a little schmoozing with some of the major book companies in the area. As much fun as she’s having sightseeing and touring cities with her best friend, she’s grateful for Rosita’s business mind, keeping her best interest at heart at all times. 

When they reach the bay, her eyes lock on a large yacht docked on the edge of the water. Nicole has never considered herself to be the type to do anything very fancy, but she doesn’t mind the idea of dressing up and playing the part for the night. She playfully raises her eyebrows at her friend, who’s also gawking at the dinner venue. 

“Ready to dine in style?” Nicole asks.

She holds out her elbow for Waverly to link her arm through it. Waverly nods and they follow Rosita down toward the boat. 

“This view is gorgeous,” Waverly tells her as they get closer to the water. 

Nicole looks around her, taking in more of the sights. The blue water of the ocean goes on as far as the eye can see and the Golden Gate bridge is visible in the distance through the thin layer of fog. 

As they make their way onto the boat, they’re greeted by a hostess to show them to their reserved table. A few people in their party have already arrived. Nicole says ‘hello’ before excusing herself to the deck of the boat to get a better view of the sun as it begins to set on the horizon. Waverly follows behind her. She doesn’t mind, but part of her feels like Rosita sent her to make sure she’s on her “best behavior.”

“Coming to babysit?” Nicole teases.

She turns back to see the brunette a few steps behind her. 

“Am I not allowed to see the sunset with my best friend?” Waverly challenges. 

“I’m only joking,” she assures her. “Rosie just likes to keep me on a tight chain and hates when I’m out of her sight.”

Waverly nods. She, of all people, understands and she sees it first hand every day since they’ve been working together.

“Well how about we disobey mom for a minute while I run to the bathroom?” Waverly gives her a wink and she can’t help but laugh.

“Meet me on deck? Don’t miss the sunset though, I hear it’s to die for.”

“Deal.”

Nicole smiles and turns to make her way up to the deck of the boat. She finds herself a spot that’s not crowded with people, leaning her elbows gently on top of the handrail. The view is incredible.

As the ship starts to sail, they are slowly surrounded by nothing but ocean. As the land becomes further away she sucks in a deep breath of fresh air, closing her eyes for a moment, before letting it out slowly.

When she opens her eyes, she pulls out her phone, snapping a few photos to capture the views. She wants something to look back on when this is all over and she has to go back to reality. 

“First time on a dinner cruise?” a voice comes from her side.

She looks away from her phone, toward the voice to see a tall, slender woman with blonde hair and bright, green eyes staring back at her. She’s dressed in a black sundress, with bright flowers on it that lands just above her knees. Nicole definitely notices the parts of her long, sun kissed legs that aren’t covered by the material of her dress. 

“Is it obvious?” she laughs, nervously, tucking her phone back into the pocket of her fitted, black slacks. 

“Nah, you just don’t seem like you come here often.” She gestures toward her phone.

Nicole figures she must have “tourist” tattooed on her forehead due to her cell phone photography of the ocean.

“I don’t,” she laughs. “First time in San Francisco, actually.”

“Ah, really?!” The woman seems surprised. 

“Guilty,” Nicole laughs. She finds herself turning toward the woman, leaning her hip into the railing of the boat now. “What about you?”

“My parents have a house out here, I like to get out whenever I can.” 

“I can’t say I blame you, it’s beautiful here.” She gestures to the world around them. 

“It sure is,” the woman responds, not taking her eyes off of Nicole.

Nicole swallows hard, realizing they’re most likely not talking about the same things here. Even being seperated from Shae, she’s still not used to flirting with other girls anymore. She’s done her fair share prior to her marriage, but she finds herself a little rusty in that category these days.

Unsure of what to say, she flashes her a dimpled smile; her go to. 

“So what kind of work do you do?” The woman asks.

Nicole has never been one to brag, so she fears telling this person what she does will come off that way. She just wants to enjoy her time away from “Author Nicole Haught” when she can and just be Nicole Haught. 

She realizes the woman is still staring at her, waiting for an answer. 

“Sorry,” she says sheepishly, blush warming her cheeks. She receives a soft smile in return. “I’m a writer,” she finally tells her. 

She notices the woman light up like she’s impressed by her answer. 

“There you are,” Rosita’s voice unapologetically breaks into the moment.

Nicole turns her head away from the pretty blonde toward her publicist. “Hey, Rosie,” she says, jaw clenched. 

“I thought you were up here to check out the views of San Francisco at sunset, not the women of San Francisco at sunset.”

She pulls on Nicole’s arm a bit. The redhead cringes, she can’t help like she’s being scolded by a parent at this moment. 

“Chill, Rosie,” Nicole huffs. “We were just talking.”

“Yeah, I was just about to give her some suggestions of the go-to’s around the area,” the woman chimes in.

“That’s very nice of you, but we have a schedule to stick to. And she’s married,” Rosita tells her, taking Nicole’s hand and waving it in the air, wedding band on display. 

“Oh, I, uh,” the woman stutters. “I didn’t mean to…”

“Not your fault,” Rosita says, glaring back at Nicole. “Where is Waverly?” she huffs. 

“Alright, Rosita, relax,” Nicole says. “Waverly went to find a bathroom. I’ll text her. Let’s just go back to the table, she continues. “My apologies for my friend,” she says to the woman. “It was nice chatting with you while it lasted.”

“Likewise,” the woman flashes her a smile.

Nicole can’t tell if it’s genuine or if she’s scared to say anything else with Rosita becoming unhinged about the situation. 

She spins on her heels, wanting to be anywhere but there in this moment. She avoids having to speak to Rosita at all costs, walking in front of her the entire way back. She looks around, hoping to catch Waverly on their way back down to their table. 

When she has no such luck, she pulls her phone out and sends her a quick text that says ‘Went back to the table with mom…’

Shortly after, she receives a response saying ‘yikes,’ that makes her laugh to herself. 

At least Waverly gets it. 

When the brunette returns to the table, she takes a seat next to Nicole and places a hand on her shoulder, silently making sure she’s okay. Nicole makes brief eye contact with her, giving her a smile that she knows she’ll read as intended; fake. 

“You okay?” Waverly whispers as she leans in closer to Nicole’s ear. The redhead nods to her friend. “Ice cream in my room tonight?”

Nicole cracks a more genuine smile. As far back as she can remember, Waverly has lived by the idea that ice cream fixes everything. As they grew up, they realized that might not be true, but it’s still worth a try. 

The rest of dinner is a blur. Nicole drinks as much as she can before she can no longer hold a conversation with the others. She doesn’t make much eye contact with Rosita, afraid she’s just going to get another lecture. It’s not that she doesn’t get it, but she still wants to be able to breathe from time to time. 

When they make it back to the hotel, but not before stopping for ice cream, Rosita says ‘goodnight’ and tells the other two that she will see them in the morning for the book signing. 

Nicole is a little annoyed by the fact that Rosita is acting like she didn’t act like a complete ass in front of that woman earlier, but doesn’t waste her breath on the fight that might occur. She tells Waverly she’s going to change into sweatpants before she joins her in her hotel room. 

As she slips into her room, she feels like the alcohol is catching up to her and rushing to her head. The room around her seems to spin and her face feels warm. She takes in a deep breath, wondering if she could just sleep it off, but she doesn’t want to blow off her best friend. 

She digs through her bag, finding a pair of sweatpants and a tee shirt to throw on. Once dressed, she slides her room key into her pocket before leaving the room, heading to Waverly’s. 

When she reaches the brunette’s door, she notices that she left it propped open. She knocks twice before pushing the door open slowly, calling out to her friend. “Hey, Waves, I’m here!” 

“Thank god,” Waverly says. Nicole laughs as she makes her way fully into the room to see the brunette, still in her dress from earlier, struggling with the zipper on the back. “Can you help me with this zipper?”

“Yeah, sure.” She makes her way over to the brunette who stands with her back to her. She’s reaching for the zipper but comes just shy of locating it. “How did you even get it up in the first place?” Nicole asks.

“Magic,” Waverly laughs. 

Nicole laughs. “I’m glad I made the decision to stop wearing dresses when I was ten,” she teases.

She stands behind her friend and takes the material of the dress in between her fingers as a brace before grabbing the zipper. 

“Your mom really loved that one.” 

“I never really gave her the choice,” Nicole laughs. 

She breathes in, the smell of Waverly’s perfume engulfs her senses. Her eyes temporarily lock on the soft skin of her back. Her fingertips lightly brush against her soft skin, causing tiny goosebumps to form. She’s mesmerized for a moment. 

“You okay back there?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah,” she says quickly.

She pulls down gently on the zipper, exposing more of Waverly’s back. One of the tiny straps of the dress slides down Waverly’s shoulder. Instinctually, she wants to fix it for her, but she uses her hands to rub her face instead. Her cheeks are still warm and she blames any thoughts she’s having on the alcohol coursing through her. 

“Thanks,” Waverly says, turning in her direction. She’s holding her dress up in the front so it doesn’t fall completely off. 

Nicole flashes the brunette a dimpled grin. “Of course.” 

“Is everything alright? You’re being weird.” Waverly gives her a look as she makes her way past the redhead, toward her suitcase. 

“What?” Nicole asks. “Uh, yeah, everything’s great.”

She gives her an awkward thumbs up that she’s glad she doesn’t see before she drops her hand back down to her side. She’s not sure why she’s acting like this, but she tries everything in her power to make it stop. 

“Okay…?” Waverly looks back up at her with a confused look on her face. Nicole smiles at her and she shakes her head, gesturing over her shoulder toward the bathroom. “I’ll be right back.” 

Nicole nods and slaps herself in the forehead with the palm of her hand when she’s finally alone in the space. In all of the years she’s been friends with Waverly, she’s never once acting this dumb around her, and she’s done some pretty dumb things. 

She’s not sure if she should blame it more on the alcohol that she consumed tonight or the fact that she’s lonely and misses romantic company. That’s the only real explanation for her feeling attraction toward her best friend, right?

She takes a seat on the bed, leaning her back up against the headboard behind her, crossing her legs in front of her. She reaches for the television remote and taps the power button, flipping through channels to find something to watch. 

The sound of the bathroom door opening doesn’t deter her focus on the tv. She sees Waverly out of the corner of her eye, making her way toward the bed. 

“Well, someone’s comfortable,” the brunette teases. “You didn’t even get the ice cream ready?” She laughs as she grabs the bag off of the table in the corner. 

“Oh shit, sorry,” the redhead apologizes as she quickly starts to stand from the bed. 

“No, no, sit.” She gestures with her hand toward Nicole. I got it.” She grabs the bag and drops it on the bed next to Nicole. 

Nicole grabs it and pulls the cartons of ice cream from inside. “You don’t have to do everything, you know.”

“Who’s gonna take care of you if I don’t?” 

Nicole narrows her eyes toward Waverly’s grinning face. She shakes her head as the brunette bounces onto the bed next to her, handing her a spoon. 

“I’m not sure what I’d do without you,” Nicole admits.

She opens one of the small cartons of ice cream, digging in right away. The cold ice cream hits her lips, a nice contrast from the burning alcohol she consumed earlier in the night. 

Waverly leans her head on the redhead’s shoulder. “Me neither,” she laughs, dogging into her own ice cream. “So tell me, what did “mom” do now?” She asks, using finger quotes with her free hand around the word “mom.” 

Nicole gives Waverly a rundown of what happened when she was in the bathroom on the boat. She explains how Rosita treated her like a child, reprimanding her in front of the woman and how she’s been acting like it hasn't happened since they got back to the hotel. 

“I know she just has my best interest at heart, but sometimes I feel like I can’t breathe around her.” 

She takes another bite of ice cream, squinting her eyes tightly in response to the brain freeze that quickly follows. 

“Have you talked to her about it?” Waverly asks.

“There’s no use,” Nicole sighs “She’s on this whole ‘keep the image kick’ like I’m not allowed to be human. I’ve dealt with the emotions of the end of my marriage, and honestly, I’m ready to move on.” 

She pauses for a moment. She thinks about how that’s probably the first time she’s spoken those words out loud, not even to Waverly. She’s felt this way for a while, but it was always an unspoken truth, until now. 

“But she thinks that I should keep pretending it’s great so it shows stability. She says people look up to me being an openly gay writer and she doesn’t want that image tainted by anything. Apparently marrying young and not having it really work out the way you thought it was is a big no-no.”

She leans her head back onto the headboard behind her, staring out in front of her. She feels the brunette place her hand gently on her shoulder, trying to gain her attention. 

“Nicole.” She speaks sternly.

It’s something Nicole is used to, something she does whenever Nicole gets down on herself. Waverly has a way of making her feel better even when she doesn’t want to. 

She lets out an audible sigh before reluctantly turning toward her friend.

“You know I’m not going to sit here and think that there’s anything wrong with you and your path in life, right?”

Nicole nods silently. 

“Rosita’s tough, but she cares about you too,” Waverly says.

Nicole thinks about how it’s hard to imagine at times, but she knows it’s true. 

“But there is nothing wrong with you,” she continues. “You are a brilliant writer and an extremely kind human being. So you got married and it didn’t work out. I can’t fully understand how that feels to you, but as your friend, as someone who loves you for everything you are-”

“Man, Earp, you’re really trying to inflate my ego here, aren’t you?” Nicole teases. She nudges her shoulder into the brunette’s, giving her a dimpled grin.

“I just want you to be happy,” Waverly says, giving her a small shove back.

“Look, I have this pint of ice cream-” She holds the ice cream out in front of her. “We’re in this beautiful city-” She gestures out toward the window, lights from the city glowing for miles. “And I have my best friend in the entire world.” 

She lifts her arm into the air, wrapping it around Waverly’s shoulder, pulling her in close. Waverly laughs and leans in closer, placing a quick kiss on her cheek. 

“What could make me happier?” She asks.

Waverly laughs again, nodding in agreement and leans her head on the headboard behind them. They spend the next couple of hours sitting together and talking. They talk more about how Nicole has been feeling, her thoughts on writing her third book and the pressure she’s been feeling, and other things as they come to mind. 

Nicole feels like this is finally the first time on tour that she feels completely comfortable just being herself. She doesn’t feel the need to perform or act like she’s someone else. When she’s with Waverly, nothing else seems to matter. 

📖 

They round off the first part of the tour with a stop in Vegas, a place that evokes a bunch of mixed feelings for Nicole. While she enjoys it and usually has a good time there, it still reminds her of Shae. It’s where they met and got married and even if it didn’t work out, she’ll always have a soft spot for the time they spent there. 

After their plane lands, they make their way into the airport and down toward baggage claim. Nicole is quiet, mostly keeping to herself. She has her computer bag hung over her shoulder, holding it close to her body. She feels Waverly looking at her every once in a while as if she’s checking in on her without words. 

She reaches her free hand into her pocket, feeling the hard surface of her cell phone. Her first instinct is to text Shae and check in with her. She feels like she suddenly misses her more than she has since she left for the tour. She resists the urge, leaving her phone where it is. She continues to run her fingers over the smooth surface, people watching as they watch through the airport as a way to distract herself from doing something she will regret.

Truth is, she hasn’t spoken to Shae in over a week. She’s proud of herself for not falling back to her old ways. This is the first time she’s traveled like this since the separation and she’s slowly teaching herself that she has no obligation to let her know what she’s doing every day. Hell, she has no idea what Shae is doing and that doesn’t seem to bother her much. 

They make it to the hotel just after dark and Nicole mentions the possibility of going out that night. Waverly isn’t against it, but Nicole can tell she’s definitely not into the idea of Vegas as much as other people are. She thinks she needs it more as a distraction than sitting in her hotel room, in the city where she married her wife, staring at a closed laptop and internally screaming at herself for not writing. 

When they enter the hotel, Rosita makes her way up to the front desk to check them in while Nicole and Waverly hang back a little. Nicole takes a seat in one of the chairs in the lobby as Waverly sits on the arm of the chair next to her. They chat idly for a moment before Nicole sees someone walking toward them out of the corner of her eye. She tries not to notice or pay much attention to it. She assumes it’s someone who might recognize her, knowing her work, which happens from time to time. 

Waverly is clearly on a different page and turns her head toward the person who continues walking toward them. “Wynonna?!” She calls out, causing Nicole to finally look in the direction of the person. 

Waverly leaps from her seat and makes her way over to her sister. It feels like she is shocked to see her, more shocked than Nicole is. Not that she really expected her to show up, but it’s Wynonna, and they’re in Las Vegas. If she was going to hunt them down anywhere on this tour, it would be here. 

A huge grin grows on the older Earp’s face as she puts her hands out in front of her. Waverly quickly wraps her arms around her sister, pulling her into a tight hug. Nicole smiles at the sight. She knows that, even if she won’t admit it, Waverly has been missing her family since they’ve been gone. 

“Where’s Alice?” Waverly asks as she loosens the hug, as if she expects the three year old to come running out as well. 

“Hitting the slots,” Wynonna says with a shrug as she pulls away from her sister and turns to Nicole for a hug. 

Nicole is now standing from her seat and reaches out to wrap her arms around the brunette. In mid hug, she feels Wynonna’s hand travel down her back, giving her ass a quick squeeze.

Nicole quickly pulls back, pushing the older Earp further away. “What the hell,” she says with a laugh.

“Missed you, Haught stuff,” Wynonna says, winking back at her. “Oh, and I’m kidding about Alice,” she scoffs. “She has a father, god, you think I’d bring my kid to Vegas when I can be hanging out with my sister and my lesbian lover?”

“Your what-?” Nicole asks, receiving no response from other Earp.

She and Wynonna have always had a good relationship, but Wynonna usually crosses every boundary there is in the process. 

“You left her with Doc?” Waverly asks, still concerned about her niece. 

“No, she’s with Gus,” she laughs. “But come on, you guys aren’t excited to see me?! Why are you the only Earp that gets to have fun? I’m still a little offended you didn’t ask me to come with you, Haught.” Wynonna shoves her elbow into Nicole’s ribs, causing her to cringe a little. 

“Come on, Wynonna, you really wanted to follow me around for six weeks, helping with my tour?” She challenges. 

“I’d follow you around the country,” Wynonna responds, looking her up and down. 

“Well, Alice would probably miss you.” 

“Not as much as I miss you,” she responds, throwing her arm around Nicole’s shoulder, pulling her close again. Nicole can’t help but laugh. 

“Okay, you two are gross. I’m going to go see if Rosita is ready with the room keys,” Waverly says, gesturing over her shoulder toward the front desk.

She turns on her heels and makes her way in that direction, leaving Nicole alone with her sister. Nicole stares in her direction, hoping she would come back soon.

“So am I bunking with you tonight, or what?” Wynonna asks, releasing her grasp around Nicole’s shoulders.

“Why does it not surprise me that you came all this way and didn’t even plan on getting a room?” Nicole asks with a laugh. 

“Who needs a room when I can share yours?” Wynonna scoffs. “Hope there's only one bed.” She winks at Nicole, who shakes her head at her. 

From the corner of her eye, Nicole sees Rosita and Waverly make their way back over to where she is waiting for them. Waverly waves the room keys in the air, handing one over to Nicole. After gathering their belongings, they make their way toward the elevator on the other side of the lobby. 

“Your sister thinks she’s shacking up with me tonight,” Nicole whispers to Waverly as they hang back a little more while Rosita and Wynonna chat idly with one another. 

“She can stay with me,” Waverly assures her. “So you can write,” she adds with a wink, nudging her elbow into the red head’s ribs. 

Nicole lets out an audible groan, causing the brunette to laugh. She knows Waverly is partially kidding, but she knows that if she doesn’t write something soon, she’s going to start coming down on her too.

After getting settled in their hotel rooms, the four women find a nearby restaurant to get dinner at. Nicole orders a couple of drinks with dinner to ease her mind of the memories that continue to taunt her of the last time she was in Vegas. 

Dinner conversation is light, but she feels a little distracted at times. She’s enjoying the fact that Wynonna is there now, keeping Rosita busy with conversation, rather than having her nag her about whether or not she’s written yet. She’s had a few ideas, jotted them down even, but they’re usually deleted as quickly as they’re written. Nothing seems to flow like it used to when she wrote the other two books. 

After the bill is settled at the table, there’s talk about their plans for the rest of the night. Rosita chooses to retire to the hotel for the night, which comes as no surprise to Nicole. She tries to convince Waverly to come out, at least for a little while. She’s partially afraid to go out with just Wynonna, but also would like to spend time with Waverly as well. There’s something about her that eases her emotions when she needs it most. 

She doesn’t push her too much when she tells her she’s not really feeling it. After a small lecture from Rosita about reputation, she says goodnight to her and Waverly at the restaurant and makes her way down the strip, into the nightlife of Vegas with Wynonna by her side. 

The night goes a little different than she expected it to go with the idea of Waverly by her side instead of Wynonna. Her original plan was to get drunk enough not to think about her ex wife, which would probably backfire regardless, but it was a good thought. 

Instead, the night starts with strippers and ends in a casino where she watches Wynonna blow more money than she wins. She has a few drinks, but feels more responsible for getting Wynonna back to the hotel safely than she originally intended. 

When she finally convinces Wynonna to head hack to the hotel for the night, it’s more like very early in the morning. She pulls out her phone and calls for an Uber, dragging the brunette outside to wait for its arrival. 

The car pulls up, a white, Chevrolet Tahoe, and Nicole leans in to open the door, gesturing for Wynonna to climb in first. The woman obliges, but it’s more of a stumble than a climb. Nicole can’t help but laugh as she climbs in after her, closing the door next to her. The Uber driver greets them politely and they do the same in return. 

The drive is fairly quiet, at one point, Nicole feels that Wynonna might have fallen asleep. But then she hears her speak. 

“So Haught, be real with me,” Wynonna begins.

Nicole gives her a look, her face is lit up by the lights of the city. She’s unsure of what she’s about to say or ask of her. Honestly, she's a little nervous. 

“What’s up?” She asks. 

“How’s my sister been?” The brunette asks. 

Nicole pauses for a moment, taken in the question and the serious tone of voice that Wynonna has. 

“What do you mean?”

“Between us?” Wynonna asks. She’s now leaning in closer, the smell of whiskey burns inside Nicole's nostrils. 

“Of course.”

“She seems a little homesick,” the older Earp informs her. “She checks in a lot and I know my sister. She’s not worried, she just wants to be filled in on what she’s missing at home.”

Guilt quickly falls over her, like a punch straight to her gut. She knows Waverly misses her family, but she didn’t really realize how much she does. She immediately starts to question whether or not she should have made Waverly come along with her for this long. Maybe she was just being selfish, wanting her best friend by her side, not thinking about what she was taking her away from.

“Don’t do that, Haught,” Wynonna says, breaking her from her thoughts. 

“Do what?”

“I know you’re Waverly’s best friend, but I’ve known you just as long as she has,” she tells her. “You’re beating yourself up inside because you feel guilty for taking her away from home for a couple of months.”

Nicole stares blankly back at her, not wanting to admit that she’s right. 

“I just wanted to make sure she’s okay, you know?” Wynonna asks. 

Nicole nods. She has always envied the relationship between Waverly and Wynonna in a way. She knows that Wynonna can be a bit much at times, but they have always been there, looking out for one another. She feels like when she was younger she used to pretend she was part of their family. As an only child, she only longed to have a sibling to look out for.

“I’ll take care of her,” Nicole assures her. 

Wynonna smiles and nods back at her. Before they can say much else, the Uber is coming to a stop in front of the hotel.

“Thank you so much,” Nicole says to the driver as she opens the door next to her. She reaches her hand out, helping Wynonna safely make her way out of the vehicle without tripping over the edge of the curb.

Nicole shuts the door of the vehicle and leads the brunette into the lobby of the hotel. She feels the need to continuously look over at her, making sure she’s staying with her. She doesn’t want to lose her somewhere in a crowd of late night gamblers and party goers. 

They safely make it to the elevator and Nicole presses 12 on the keypad, leading them up to their floor.

“Looks like you’re bunking with me afterall,” she says with a laugh.

She doesn’t want Wynonna to wake up Waverly if she’s already asleep. She also feels a little responsible for the state the older Earp is currently in. 

Once they’re in the hotel room, it doesn’t take long for Wynonna to crash onto the bed and fall asleep. Nicole rolls her eyes at the woman and leans over to at least remove her shoes so she’s not wearing them on the bed, tossing them across the room. She tries to lift the blanket to cover her as best she can, but it’s barely enough to cover half of her. She figures if she’s cold, she will figure it out. 

Nicole grabs some clothes to change into and makes her way into the bathroom. She splashes some water on her face, rinsing away some of the places they had been that night. She notices dark circles under her eyes. They scream at her to try to get some sleep. She makes her way back out into the room, laying down on the other side of the bed, pulling the blankets over her the best that she can. 

As she lays in the dark room, thoughts of the conversation she had with Wynonna fill her mind. She starts to worry that Waverly is only going along with all of this because it’s something that she wanted her to do. She tries to think of all of the times that she checked in to see how Waverly was doing, but can only remember the times that Waverly was taking care of her. 

Was she really that shitty of a friend?

The sound of Wynonna’s snoring fills her ears and she tries to roll over, placing an extra pillow over her head to drown out the sound, hoping it will drown out her thoughts as well. She closes her eyes, trying to sleep the night off, but the snoring sounds like it’s just getting louder. 

After tossing and turning for some time, she finally stands from the bed. She looks back at Wynonna, placing the trash can on the floor next to her and a bottle of water on the nightstand. She grabs her room key and cell phone and shoves them in the pocket of her sweatpants before heading for the door. She makes her way down the hall, two doors down and knocks gently on the door, hoping for an answer.

After a few short moments, the door cracks open and a very tired looking Waverly opens. 

“I’m so sorry for waking you,” she says. “Can I sleep here tonight? Your sister is snoring so loudly and she’s going to keep me up all night.”

Waverly’s eyes are barely open. She looks behind her at the clock to check the time and lets out a big yawn. “Nicole, it’s already the middle of the night, you’ve basically been up all night.”

“Yeah but at least here I know I’ll at least get some sleep,” she says, giving her a bit of a pouty lip to try to convince her. 

“You don’t think I snore?” Waverly teases. 

“Nothing can be worse than Wynonna right now,” Nicole assures her. “She’s drunk.”

Waverly gives her a knowing look. Drunk Wynonna is nothing new to either of these women. 

“Fine,” she says as she opens the door wider, gesturing for the redhead to enter. Waverly climbs back into bed, sliding to one side to leave room as Nicole shuts the door behind her. 

“Thanks, Waves,” Nicole says as she places her phone and room key on the nightstand and climbs into the other side of the bed and pulls the blanket up over her shoulder, resting her head on the pillow. 

“Mmhmm,” Waverly yawns. She sounds like she’s already falling back to sleep. 

Nicole smiles into the darkness at her friend. 

“Hey, Waves?”

“Hm?” 

“You’re cool with being here right?” Nicole asks, guilt still consuming her. “Like on this trip with me. Traveling around and being away from home for so long?”

“Mmhmm,” Waverly replies softly, soft snoring immediately following. 

Nicole sighs, a little frustrated that she can’t talk to her about how she’s feeling at this moment, but also a little jealous at how easily Waverly can fall asleep. 

“Night, Waves,” she whispers softly into the darkness, receiving no response in return. 

She rolls over, facing the opposite direction of her friend. Grabbing her phone from the nightstand she unlocks the screen. She did a fairly good job not looking at it much during the night, but there’s something about the quiet that makes her feel lonely. 

She opens her texts, clicking on Shae’s name. She types out a few words at a time, deleting it each time before settling on something to say. Reluctantly, she hits send before she can take it back. 

Nicole hears the brunette shift in the bed next to her and quickly locks her phone, not wanting to wake her with the light of her phone. She glances behind her, noticing Waverly is still fast asleep, her body now closer to her own, the gap between them barely there. 

A mixture of comfort and exhaustion falls over her. She turns her body, facing Waverly’s sleeping form, pulling a spare pillow close to her body between them. She closes her eyes and while listening to the sound of Waverly’s steady breathing, finally succumbing to sleep. 


	2. The South

The rest of the trip to Vegas is a blur. Wynonna and Waverly spend most of the next day together, out and about. Nicole can see how happy it made her. She is trying to be a more attentive friend, making sure Waverly is okay and having a good time as well. 

She spends more time on her own during this part of the trip. It’s not that she isn’t invited to hang out with Waverly and Wynonna, but she declines most offers. She tries to find some sort of inspiration to continue writing, but comes up short every time. There was even a moment where she opened her laptop, brought up a blank word document, put her fingers to the keyboard and then immediately slammed the machine shut.

She has three different book signings in the Vegas area. She tries to blame her lack of progress on her busy schedule, but she knows that Rosita doesn’t actually buy it. She never realized how popular she was going to feel in Nevada. She tries not to let it inflate her ego, but Waverly still teases her about how she can feel her head getting a little bigger. 

From Nevada, they make the trip to the southern part of the country. By now, Nicole is so used to traveling by plane that the process feels like muscle memory by now. Going through security, boarding the vessel, taking off, touching ground, it’s like a new routine. She’s even become more comfortable with the flight itself, only feeling slightly uneasy about the taking off and landing part. Waverly does her best to distract her during these times, something she will forever appreciate.

When they make it to the airport, they climb out of the car that brought them there and thank the driver as they retrieve their bags from the trunk. Rosita immediately takes the lead, as usual, and Nicole and Waverly follow behind as they make their way toward security, IDs and boarding passes in hand. Nicole stands in the security line, takes her shoes off, and puts her belongings in an empty bucket, siding it toward the TSA officer on the other side of the table. 

It’s early and she’s tired, but she makes her way through the metal detectors without setting them off, as per usual. On the other side, she collects her belongings, stopping at a nearby bench to put her shoes back on. 

Reaching into the pocket of her backpack, she pulls out her wedding band and holds it in her hand. She stares at the small piece of metal for a moment, thinking about the symbol that it once represented and what it means to her now. After visiting the place where her marriage began, she feels like she is finally ready for full closure from what once was.

Part of her wants to toss it back into the bag, forget about putting it back on. She doesn’t want the constant reminder of a marriage that didn’t work out, taunting her every time she looks down at her hand. 

“Got everything?” Rosita asks as she makes her way up to Nicole. 

Nicole looks up at her and smiles as she slides the cold ring back into her finger, covering the tan line that has formed. She hasn’t had it off of her hand long enough to let it fade, therefore it’s a constant reminder even when the ring isn’t there.

She remembers a day where she was excited about the tan line. She was excited to show Shae when it finally formed, telling her that it would forever remind her of how lucky she was to be married to her. She tries to shake away the memory, feeling like it was from a different lifetime.

“Yeah, all set.”

She forces a smile and slings the strap of her bag over her shoulder. 

She stares at the ground as they walk, not really feeling like talking to anyone. Her ring catches her eye as she swings her arm next to her. She hears Rosita list off their flight information, leading them to their gate. She feels an elbow nudge her after a few minutes of walking. 

She looks to her side, seeing a concerned looking brunette next to her. She tries to give her a smile, a poker face she knows the woman can see right through.

“You good?” She whispers.

Nicole nods and smiles back at her. Waverly immediately squints her eyes in disbelief. 

Nicole’s eyes trail back down to her ring on her finger and she feels Waverly’s eyes follow them. She feels the brunette placing a supportive hand on her shoulder, squeezing it softly. Nicole feels herself relax a little, sucking in a deep breath. As she pushes the air back out of her lungs, she’s able to give her friend a more genuine smile. 

After talking with Wynonna in Vegas, she doesn’t want to put her issues on Waverly as much. She knows that the brunette is keeping more inside that she allows her to see and she wants to be as good of a friend to her as Waverly has always been to her. 

“I’ll be fine,” Nicole assures her.

She sets her bag down in one of the seats by their gate, searching for her headphones for the upcoming flight. She figures music can help drown out the loud thoughts in her head.

“You know you can talk to me, right?” Waverly asks as she sits down in the seat next to Nicole’s bag.

Nicole nods and smiles back at the brunette. She thinks for a moment how she would ever make it through this tour without her. “Ready for the next leg of this tour?”

Waverly nods, smiling from her lips to her eyes. Something about her smile eases Nicole’s frustrations even more. It’s been the one consistency in her life for as long as she can remember. No matter what was going on, who was upsetting her, Waverly smiles and she knows there’s still good left in the world.

“Are you two going to keep having some sort of weird non-verbal best friend’s conversation or are you going to board this plane with me?” Rosita's voice breaks them from their moment. 

Nicole turns her head, noticing people around them beginning to line up to board the plane. “I guess we can join you,” she teases her manager, giving her a wink.

Rosita shakes her head at the redhead, rolling her eyes, as she lifts her bag and turns toward the direction that the line is moving in. Nicole waits for Waverly to stand and sling her backpack over her shoulder before she joins the line behind her. She’s slightly surprised that Rosita isn’t behind her, watching her every move.

Perhaps this means the woman is going to loosen up a bit and give her more freedom.

Probably not. 

They land in Texas and Nicole takes a look out the window. The sky is the brightest shade of blue that she has ever seen, and the sun shines bright in the sky. She fell asleep for the majority of the flight, waking up feeling better than she did when they arrived at the Vegas airport. 

They depart the airplane quickly and make their way to baggage claim. By now, Nicole feels like she could do this routine in her sleep. She grabs hers and Waverly’s suitcase off of the conveyor belt as they come out together. Rosita pushes through the crowd a moment later to grab her own. 

They follow Rosita’s lead again as she turns toward the exit signs. She scans the line of cars outside of the airport before her eyes seem to lock on one in particular. She gestures with her hand for Nicole and Waverly to follow her as if they weren’t already doing so. 

As much as Rosita drives her nuts at times, she knows how much easier her life is with her in it. She might nag her about writing and want her to keep up a certain image, but the idea of Rosita not being on tour with her, taking care of all of the small, mundane tasks that Nicole doesn’t even want to focus on, definitely scares her. 

When they reach the car, the driver is standing on the outside with a small sign in his hand that reads “Nicole Haught.” While part of her is used to this by now, another part of her will never get over the fact that she’s important enough to have drivers waiting for her outside of the airport. 

The driver opens the back door, allowing them to slide in while he places their suitcases in the trunk. Nicole gestures to Waverly, allowing her to slide in first. The brunette takes the offer and climbs into the car, settling into a seat as Nicole follows after her. 

The ride to the hotel is quiet, but nice. Nicole leans back into the seat behind her, watching out the window as the sights of a new city fill her eyes. The buildings are large and the sky might be a brighter blue that it was when they first landed, if that’s even possible. She finds herself leaning further into Waverly’s side as she stretches to look out the window even more. Waverly doesn’t even flinch in response, or request any more personal space. 

The car slows to a stop in front of a hotel that appears to be located in the heart of the city. Nicole turns her attention to Rosita, who is staring down at her phone. She appears to be going over a schedule for the next couple of days, something that Nicole noticed she does at the beginning of every new city or town. 

“Ready?” Nicole asks, breaking the brunette from her focus on her phone.

Rosita looks up and nods her head. She glances out the window, almost shocked that the car has stopped and they have already reached their destination. 

“Just making sure we’re set for this afternoon!” the woman says with a smile as she locks her phone screen and slides it into her pocket. 

Rosita pulls the door handle open and climbs out of the side of the car onto the curb in front of the hotel. She stands next to the door, waiting for Nicole and Waverly to leave the car before closing the door behind them. Nicole naturally reaches her hand out to Waverly, helping her out of the car.

“Thanks,” Waverly says with a smile as she takes the offer.

“You never help me out of cars,” Rosita teases dryly. She doesn’t even look in Nicole’s direction, but instead reaches into the trunk of the vehicle to retrieve their bags.

Nicole huffs at her manager. “In my defense, you were the first out.”

“I’m kidding,” Rosita tells her. “I don’t need your chivalry,” she teases, winking in the redhead’s direction. 

Nicole hears a laugh come from Waverly’s direction and she shakes her head at the pair. She slings her backpack over one of her shoulders as she extends the handle of her suitcase and begins to roll it toward the large building in front of them. 

They make their way into the hotel and head to the front desk to check in. The process is quick and it’s not long before they’re making their way to their separate rooms. They make plans to meet in a couple of hours to get ready to head to the bookstore for Nicole’s signing. She’s only half listening when Rosita gives her the rundown of what’s going to happen. She knows it’s not the only time she will be informed. She nods until she’s free to go into her room and relax for a little bit.

She pushes the door behind her and drops her bags on the floor next to the bed. Her first instinct is to immediately lay down on the bed, exhaustion quickly taking over. Instead, she decides taking a shower is probably a better choice in attempts to feel more alive and awake for her book signing later that day. 

She briefly checks her phone for any missed texts or calls that she may have gotten. She’s not really sure why she even does it, she doesn’t hear much from anyone that she’s not with on the tour. It sounds a little pathetic when she thinks about it, but at the same time, she’s under enough stress and would love to just be left alone from time to time. 

Wynonna texts her randomly throughout the days. Ever since they were all in Vegas, she’s heard from her more than she probably ever has in her life. It’s mostly just random gifs that tend to be insinuating something sexual toward her. She usually just laughs those off and doesn’t even respond, but it doesn’t take long for the older Earp to call her out for “ignoring her.”

When she sees that she hasn’t missed anything, she sets her phone back down on the nightstand and begins to strip her clothes off, preparing to rid herself from the grime she feels after traveling. She tosses the garments onto the floor before making her way into the bathroom to start the shower. 

After turning on the water, she catches a glimpse of herself in the mirror above the sink. The dark circles under her eyes are making an uninvited appearance, but she’s not surprised with how exhausted she’s been feeling lately. As much as she loves promoting her book on tour, she’s realizing the toll it actually takes on a person to always be “on” and ready to sell something at all times. 

She rubs her hands over her face as if she’s going to wipe the dark circles away. With no change to her face, she turns to check the temperature of the water. When it’s a good enough temperature, she climbs in, feeling the hot water immediately hitting her cold skin. She closes her eyes and allows the water to cascade over her head. 

She stretches her arms out, pressing her hands flat against the wall of the shower. The water beats down on her back, massaging her skin and relaxing her muscles. She takes a deep breath in and holds it for a moment before she lets it out slowly. 

She remains in this position for a few more moments before taking the time to wash her body. Lathering her body with soap, her mind begins to wander, thinking about the last time she felt someone else’s hands on her body. Loneliness takes over for a short period of time as she misses being physically close to another human. 

The soap suds drip from her body, becoming replaced with clear water where they once were. Her eyes remain closed, her senses feel heightened. She absent mindedly drags her fingers down the front of her body, fingers brush lightly between her legs, lightly teasing herself. 

She tries to remember the last time she was alone long enough to even release the tension that has built up inside of her since her marriage ended. Between traveling, book signings, meetings and just time spent with Waverly and Rosita, this is the most amount of time she’s spent by herself, on the tour alone, that she hasn’t been asleep. 

She allows herself to dip her fingers between her legs, running them through her slick folds. A deep moan accidentally escapes her mouth as she uses her free hand to brace herself against the shower wall. 

Pressure builds up inside of her as she slightly curls her fingers, touching herself where she needs it the most. She soon becomes overcome with pleasure. Her mind is free of any thought of worry or stress as she loses herself in the moment. 

Her hips thrust forward, fingers rubbing back and forth at a perfect rhythm. Her abdominal muscles tighten as her breathing becomes heavier. She’s almost panting as she speeds her fingers, creating faster strokes until she can barely take it any longer. 

Another moan escapes her lips and she doesn’t even bother to stifle it. She feels her hips trust hard against her hand as she reaches the point of climax. She pauses for a moment before she lifts her hand and runs it under the warm water above her. She slowly opens her eyes and steadies her breathing. 

Quickly cleaning herself up, she can’t help but wonder when the next time she’ll be able to share a moment like that with another woman will be. As nice as it is to finally have a release, she knows that deep down she will continue to long for a connection with someone else. 

The thoughts are quickly disrupted by Rosita’s reminders that she has an image to keep up. She lets out an audible groan. She understands that the woman just wants what’s best for her, but that doesn’t make it any less frustrating when she has needs. 

She eventually has to shut the water off and leave the shower, allowing herself time to become presentable for her book signing. She anticipates the cold that is about to take over her body in the time it takes her to climb out of the shower and wrap a towel around her wet body. 

She dries herself off and wraps the towel tightly around her body. As she makes her way over to the sink, she lifts her hand and wipes steam from the mirror. It’s just enough that she can see her face again. There are still dark circles but she feels and looks a lot more refreshed than she did when she arrived. 

Digging through her suitcase in the other room, she finds clothes to put on; a pair of skinny jeans and a tightly fitted royal blue tee shirt. She doesn’t bother to check the temperature outside, she assumes it’s warmer than she’s used to. 

She digs for a button down shirt to layer over top in case she’s cold in the bookstore. It’s a trick she discovered about a week ago when she realized some people keep their stores colder than others. There’s nothing worse than shivering while trying to talk to people about her book. 

Holding the shirt up in front of her, she notices several wrinkles from it time spent shoved in a suitcase. She searching around for an ironing board an spots one hanging in the nearby closet. As she lays the garnet out to be ironed, there’s a knock at the door.

She jumps slightly, as if she forgot she had people that wild eventually come looking for her. She swings the door open swiftly, a smile on her face. The two familiar faces staring back at her almost look concerned for a second. It’s as if they haven’t seen her smile in a while. As a matter of fact, they probably haven’t. 

“Come on in, I'm just ironing this shirt real quick,” Nicole says, gesturing over her shoulder.

“Well you look rejuvenated,” Rosita says as she hands the redhead one of the coffees from her hand and makes her way into Nicole’s hotel room. 

“I took a really good shower,” she replies as she accepts the coffee and immediately brings it to her lips to take a sip. 

The warm liquid slides smoothly down her throat. 

“Almost ready to do this thing,” she says with a grin, leaving the other two women with puzzled looks on their face. 

She laughs to herself as she shuts the door behind Waverly. The two woman take a seat on the end of the bed. 

“You’re more chipper than I am most days,” Waverly teases. “Did you already have coffee?” 

Nicole laughs and shakes her head. “Just feeling alive.”

“I’m going to have to come use your magic shower,” Rosita jokes as she takes a large swig of her own coffee. 

Nicole laughs again, shrugging her shoulders as she continues to iron her shirt. The three women begin to chat amongst themselves. Rosita explains the process of the day and the venue for the signing. It sounds like it’s a larger bookstore than she’s used to. While that’s good for the promotional part, it doesn’t make her nerves any calmer. 

They arrive at the bookstore pretty early. Nicole looks up at the building in front of her and her eyes widen at the size. Most of the other bookstores she had been to now seem like they were on the smaller side, but like they say, everything is bigger in Texas.

Rosita holds the front door open for Nicole and Waverly and they politely thank her for the action. When they make it inside, Nicole's eyes widen further. The sight is beautiful. More books than she could ever imagine. She gets lost in the sight, not hearing anything that Rosita was saying.

She finds herself wandering around the store a little. Not even realizing if she’s being followed or not. She ends up looking around her to see that she’s alone for the moment. She sees Waverly and Rosita on the other side of the store, talking to another person who she assumes to be the store owner. Part of her feels rude for not going over at that moment to introduce herself, but the part of her that was mesmerized by the books took over and she continues browsing.

She closes her eyes for a moment, sucking in a deep breath of air. The smell of books fill her senses. She remembers back to when she was a kid and her parents would take her to the library in town. She loved walking down aisle after aisle of books, being too short to peer over the top of even the shorter shelves, immersing herself completely in everything around her. She would run her finger tip across the old and new book spines as she walked, feeling herself becoming part of the environment.

As she slowly peels her eyes open, she sees that she's no longer alone. Before her eyes can adjust, she assumes Rosita or Waverly have come to find her. Her eyes first focus on the person’s shoes. They’re a pair of warn looking combat boots, barely laced, definitely not Waverly or Rosita.

Instead, she is joined by a stranger; a younger girl, mostly likely in her teens. Nicole’s eyes drift to the familiar book that she is holding in her hands and a small smile forms involuntarily. The girl's eyes are big, like she's just seen a ghost and she doesn't speak.

"Good taste in books," Nicole says with a small laugh, pointing at the book in her hands.

A smile tugs at the corner of the girl’s lips as she looks down, untucking the book from her side. She holds in out in front of her. The cover is a bit tattered and warn, as if it had been read several times. Nicole immediately relates to her, thinking about the condition she left some of her favorite books in when she was younger.

"It's my favorite," she says, shyly. She reaches up and tucks her hit behind her ear, fidgeting with it for a moment.

"But have you read the second one?" Nicole teases, playfully, trying to ease her nerves a bit. She can see the girl relaxing a little more in her presence as the moments pass.

Throughout the tour she has seen people get excited to meet her, people that can barely speak to her, giddy people that can't stop laughing, but there was something endearing about the girl that decided to approach her as she wandered around aimlessly through the bookstore. She didn't seem to have any other reason but to just say 'hi.'

"I'm planned to buy it today," she says with a smile. She tucks the book back under her arm, fingers gripping it tightly.

“I’m only teasing,” Nicole says with a laugh. “I’m flattered.”

The girl let’s out a laugh. "I came here for your signing, I know it's not until later, but I like to just wander around bookstores sometimes." Her cheeks become red. “But I saw you and you looked like you were probably doing the same, I didn’t mean to bother you, I just wanted to say hi and that I really love your book.”

“Hey, it’s alright,” Nicole assures the girl who’s slightly rambling at this point. “What’s your name?” she asks.

“Oh, sorry, it’s Rachel.”

“Well, Rachel, I’m happy that you took time out of your wandering to say hi,” Nicole says, offering her a genuine smile.

"Of course! I've always wanted to be a writer and reading your book has really inspired me to want to create worlds of my own,” she explains. "When I saw you were going to be here today, I had to figure out a way to make it."

Nicole is completed flattered by the complement. She’s gotten several people explaining to her what her books have meant to them, but never before has anyone told her she’s an inspiration behind them wanting to write. If she only knew how uninspired Nicole actually has been herself. It’s hard to feel like she’s not a fraud when she hasn’t even been productive when she should be.

“Reading has always been an escape for me, being able to disappear in other worlds has kind of made life easier to tolerate," Rachel admits. "So I thought seeing you in person would give me more of an idea of the real person behind the stories you tell. Makes wanting to be a writer a little more realistic, ya know?"

Rachel’s words pull on Nicole’s heart strings. She has no idea where this girl has been in her life, or what her path has looked like, yet she has still had an unknown influence on her. Here she is feeling bad for herself for having writer’s block, feeling out of control and like her life is a mess right now.

She goes through times of forgetting the positives in life, feeling like it’s almost impossible to do, but moments like this bring her back to reality.

"When you put it that way, you make me feel more like a real person rather than just something to produce stories," Nicole admits.

Rachel laughs. "I think it's easy for people to forget that sometimes when you're on deadlines and whatever."

"You're very wise," Nicole tells her. "Hey, listen, can I give you some advice?"

The girl nods eagerly.

"Just stay true to yourself, okay? It's easy to get lost in the excitement of publishing your first book, even your second. But you don't want to forget why you started in the first place," she tells her. "I can admit even I forget sometimes, but I have a really good friend that keeps me grounded and reminds me to slow down and remember why I started writing in the first place."

"Sounds like my friend, Billy," Rachel laughs. "He's always on me when I don't think I'm good enough."

"Hold onto that," Nicole tells her. "Trust me, they might seem overly positive and optimistic at times about your abilities to produce something worth reading, but at the end of the day, they're the best people to keep around."

She catches Waverly waving toward her from the corner of her eye. She looks in her direction, making eye contact with her. The brunette smiles and gestures for her to come over to her.

"Speaking of those friends," she says with a laugh, gesturing toward her signing table. "Hey, listen, it was great meeting you and getting to chat for a few minutes. Come on over to the table later and I can sign that book for you if you want." She points at the book in her hand. "And we'll make sure you have a copy of the second one," she adds with a wink.

"Thank you so much!" Rachel says as she begins to turn in the other direction.

"Oh, and Rachel?" Nicole adds. The girl turns back for a brief moment. "I look forward to reading what you write someday."

Seeing the smile that forms on the girl's face brings her back to the first time she realized people wanted to read what she wrote. She felt a sense of pride that she had never felt before and didn't want it to ever go away. Since then, it's something that has come and gone, but she thinks deep down she just needs moments like this to bring her back to the reality of it all.

Rachel thanks her again as they part ways. Nicole makes her way over to the table where Rosita is looking over a list that she holds in her hands and Waverly is digging through a box of books.

Rosita looks up from her list. "What did I tell you about flirting with people in public?" she asks, a rare smirk appearing on her lips.

"Now I know you don't joke a lot, but that better be one," Nicole warns her.

Waverly breaks out into laughter. “She’s kidding,” she says quickly. “We were just wondering if you were going to help set up your table,” she teases.

“Isn’t that what I pay you guys for?” Nicole retorts, smirking back at the brunette.

She grabs a box from the floor and sets in on a nearby chair, opening it to reveal its contents. Inside, she notices a stack of bookmarks with a small description of who she is and a little blurb about her book series. She takes them out, keeping them stacked nicely, placing them on the table.

“Oh so we have to do all the manual labor while you get to entertain fan girls and have your ego inflated?” Rosita asks with a laugh.

“Hey, if it inflates my ego and reminds me why I write, are you really going to complain?” Nicole questions as she closes the box, leaving the other stack to restock later if needed.

“I’ll complain less when I see you writing,” Rosita tells her, pointing a finger toward her.

Nicole laughs and shakes her head at her publicist. Maybe this is what she needs to light the flame and get her to really start writing. She knows that as soon as the tour is over, she’s going to have to buckle down and produce something anyway, so it would be better if she could at least start sooner than later.

She scans the table, noticing Waverly adjusting things that they had already placed. On one side, there is a stack of copies of the first book in the series next to a stack of copies of the second book. Waverly takes one of each book and leans them against the stack, displaying them better for people to see what they are. She always makes it look good.

She thanks the brunette as she makes her way around the table, grabbing her water bottle from her bag. She takes a quick sip of water as they are joined by another person. It’s the man that was with the pair earlier when she was walking around the store.

“Nicole,” Rosita says. “This is Xavier Dolls, the owner of the bookstore.”

Nicole smiles at the man and puts the cap back on her water bottle. She places it on the table and reaches her hand out to the man.

“Very nice to meet you,” she says. “Thank you so much for the opportunity to sign here. I love hour store.” She looks around the room, still in awe.

“It's a pleasure to have you!” the man says, shaking her hand in return. "We love having authors visit. It's brings in crowds, but it's also nice to see meet writers and see first hand how these stories came to be. Are you enjoying your trip so far? Rosita was telling me about all the stops you've made before this."

"It's definitely more than I've ever done," Nicole laughs. "But it's been an adventure, I'm definitely grateful for the opportunity."

"Well, keep writing stories like you do and I'm sure it won't be the last opportunity you have," Xavier says.

Nicole can feel Rosita's eyes on her, silently judging her again for her lack of progress on her third book. Nicole puts a smile on her face, ignoring the woman's looks and nods at the man.

"Definitely working on it," she says cheerfully.

"I look forward to reading it then," he man says.

Nicole is taken aback a bit by the comment. She has interacted with several bookstore owners by now and never really felt that any of them were actually fans or had even ever read her books. She always just felt that she was bringing in more revenue for them while at the same time having the opportunity to promote her own writing. This time, she felt like she was actually in the presence of someone who truly read her book and was excited to have her there for more reasons than just money.

"I won't continue to bother you guys," the man says. "Just let me know if you need anything!"

The three women all assure him that he isn't a bother at all. When he excuses himself from the area, they continue to work together to get the table and everything else they need set for the signing. Near the table, there is a podium for Nicole to do some reading at and answer questions from the people that come to the signing.

There are several chairs set up for people to sit during this time as well. She was never much for public speaking, but it's something that she's sort of grown numb to as the time went on. She didn't really have time to worry about it too much if she was going to travel from city after city, promoting her book.

At her first book signing, she only read a small bit of the book, mostly just giving a quick overview. She felt that as the time went on, she felt more comfortable with the public speaking part and found herself reading more, answering more questions, and even engaging the crowd in different conversations about the series itself.

When it is almost time for the signing to begin, Nicole starts to feel the nerves build up in her stomach again. It is something that doesn't seem to ever go away, no matter how many times she does a signing. She stands next to one of the nearby bookshelves, leaning against it slightly. She feels Waverly step closer to her, placing a supportive hand on her lower back.

"You good?" she asks.

Nicole stares off toward the crowd of people that are entering the building, filing their way down toward the area that was set up for her signing. Some of them sit in chairs, while others hang out nearby, chatting idly amongst themselves. She stands there, almost in a trance, for a moment before she breaks her stare from the crowd and turns toward her friend. Her hand hasn't moved and it brings a feeling of comfort over Nicole. She gives her a small smile and nods.

"Yeah, of course," she says.

Waverly gives her a look, seeing through her façade of acting like she's totally fine.

"Nervous?"

"Maybe a little, I'll be fine," Nicole assures her. She's not even sure she's convinced herself.

"I've never doubted that," Waverly says with a wink, bumping into her side a bit.

She drops her hand back down to her side. Nicole notices it's missing right away.

"Do I need to remind you of how great you are?" the brunette asks.

"I mean, it never hurts," Nicole says with a laugh.

She glances back at the crowd again, noticing most of the chairs are now filled with people still standing around the sides. Her eyes widen at the sight. She turns her back to the crowd, now more focused on Waverly.

"Well, I'm not sure how much my opinion matters," Waverly begins. "But, for what it's worth, you're one of the single greatest people I've ever know."

Nicole looks back at the woman, unsure if she's just trying to make her feel better. She knows that Waverly loves her. She has always told her how she values their friendship and can't image her life without her, but there is something about what she is saying that feels different. She just doesn't know why.

"I've seen the way your stories reach people in ways that you probably could never imagine," she continues.

Nicole chuckles. It's true. One thing she has stayed is almost too humble, so humble that she is forever mind blown when people even show up to these signings in the first place.

She can't help but smile. "You're opinion matters more than I could ever explain," Nicole tells her. "And thank you, Waves, really. I could never do this without you."

"I'm sure you could," the brunette tells her.

One thing Waverly will never do is make her feel like she has to be dependent on someone else in order to feel value in herself and her ability to be great.

"I have the best job of this tour," she continues. "I get to sit back and watch you interact with everyone that comes to your table. I get to watch you introduce your hard work, talk about what it means to you, even read your own words out loud for others to hear. If you could see what I see, you'd understand why I'm always going to pump you up before the event starts. Because beyond those nerves," she pokes her in the stomach with her finger. "Is something pretty magical."

Nicole finds herself become lost in the words falling out of her friend's mouth. She has experienced several of Waverly Earp's pep talks throughout the years, and they never cease to amaze her. She squints her eyes at the look on Waverly's face. It's a soft smile, eyes locked on hers like she's looking straight into her soul. She feels something shift in the pit of her stomach. A smile forms on her own lips.

"Almost ready to get this thing started?" Rosita's voice comes from behind her, breaking her from the moment.

Waverly nods and rubs her face with her hand, backing away from Nicole a bit. Nicole turns toward the voice of her publicist.

"Let's do this," she says, sucking in a deep breath.

She lets it out slowly, stealing a quick glance back at Waverly who is smiling in her direction. They share a synchronized nod and the brunette gestures for her to take the lead out toward the table.

When the signing finally begins, she feels like it goes by faster than the time it took to set up. She takes her spot up at the podium, finally face to face with the large amount of people in attendance. She tries not to think about how many people might actually be there.

Waverly takes a seat at the table, ready to get started with book sales and Rosita stands a few feet behind her, monitoring her as she begins. Standing in front of the crowd, she introduces herself as if they didn't already know who she was. She often wondered if anyone just sat down in the chairs because they were curious, or if they strictly came because the were already fans and wanted to meet her.

She gives a brief description of the series and reviews the first book a bit. She introduces the second book, giving a few plot points without trying to give away too much of the storyline in case some people haven't read it yet.

She reads a few passages from her book, things that resonate the most with her:

_Avery had been the only constant in Sloane's life for as long as she could remember. She never made her feel bad for being herself, for making mistakes, for taking chances on things that might never work out._

_She was there for her when no one else was; from her parent's messy divorce, to her dad's new family to the death of her grandmother when she was ten. She supported her when she didn't even deserve it. Even when she chose girls over her, Avery was there to pick up the pieces of every broken heart she ever had._

_"That's the thing about lifelong friendships," Avery told her. "They're always there for you, even when you don't think you need them."_

  
  


The sound of clapping fills the room when she finishes reading. A big smile forms on her her face and she thanks everyone for listening. She tells them that she will be taking a seat at the table for people to come up, ask questions, purchase her books and she will sign autographs.

This part is Nicole's favorite. While there are still a lot of people, it's easier for her to engage one on one. She listens attentively to what people have to say when they come up to her. She is always in awe of other people's stories. Some want to write someday, some do write stories of their own and others just love to get lost in the books that they read.

She had set aside a book for the girl she had met earlier in the day. Surprising her with a free copy. She signed it, encouraging her to keep writing and never to give up on her dreams. The girl was ecstatic, and made sure to tell Nicole how much it meant to her.

By the end of the signing, Nicole is exhausted. When everyone leaves, she take a moment to lay her head down on the table, causing Waverly to laugh at her.

"Wake up there sleepy head," the brunette says, shaking her shoulder a little.

"Time to pack up," Rosita reminds her.

Nicole lets out an audible groan, dramatically throwing herself back in her chair.

"Look, we do this and we can go get some thing to eat," Rosita reminds her.

There's a sudden growl in her stomach and causes her to stand up from her seat. Picking up a box from the floor underneath the table, she starts to help clean up.

📖 

From Texas, they fly to Florida where she doesn't have much time in the hotel before she has to arrive to her first signing. Nicole definitely preferred the schedules where she had a little free time to detox from the stress of the flight to their next destination, but this signing didn't last as long either. When they were done with the first signing, they had packed up fairly quickly and made their way to a local restaurant for drinks and dinner.

They sit at a small table in the corner of the restaurant, away from the crowded room as much as possible. After the amount of people she had seen that day, Nicole enjoyed being tucked away from being the center of attention. They order a round of drinks to start and begin skimming the menu for whatever jumps out at them and sounds appetizing.

Somewhere in her journey down the third page of the menu, she sees someone approaching the table out of the corner of her eye. She slightly panics, realizing she hasn’t quite chosen what she wants to eat yet. She tries to read faster, unable to make her eyes focus on the words anymore. She figures if worse comes to worse, she will just point at something and hope for the best, or ask Waverly.

When she finally looks up she sees a surprised look on Waverly's face.

"Waverly?" a man asks. "Waverly Earp?"

"Perry Crofte!?" Waverly asks, in a tone that sounds almost like an surprised squeal of excitement.

"What are you doing down here?" The man asks. He's dressed in a shirt and tie; shirt tucked nicely into his dress pants. Nicole assumes he's still their waiter. She tries to follow the interaction, while continuing to pick something to feed her starving stomach.

"I’m working," she hears Waverly say. "We’re on a book tour, this is my best friend, Nicole and her publicist, Rosita. Nicole is an amazing writer," the brunette brags, nudging her with her hand.

Nicole looks up from her frantic reading and feels her cheeks blush at the comment. As far as she’s concerned, right now she’s a former writer because she has yet to write any new material lately. At least none that she thinks is worth keeping. She felt more inspired after her signing in Texas and meeting a young fan of hers, but the words just don't seem to want to flow the way that she needs them to.

She gives the man a smile and a wave. 

"Oh, I’m so sorry, I’m rude," Waverly apologizes. "This is Perry, we’re old camp friends!"

Nicole laughs to herself. She remembers the days when Waverly would go away to summer camp. It was only for a few years until she decided that she'd rather stick around town for the summer and hang out with her friends. She always missed her when she was gone, but the stories she came back with were enough to make her want to go some summers.

"Camp friends?" Rosita asks. 

"Summer camp, when we were kids," Waverly tells her.

"It's very nice to meet you both," Perry tells them, donning a genuine smile. "I was also coming over to see if you're ready to order," he says, eyes on Nicole ask she glances from the menu to the man's face.

Rosita and Waverly nod in response, looking down at their menus once more to read from them.

"I'll just pick something," Nicole says with a laugh.

They start with Rosita giving her order. By the time it gets around to Nicole, she settles on the first thing that popped out to her that sounded good. She hasn't really been disappointed with any of her food choices on this trip so far, so she's sure it'll be fine. The chat idly amongst themselves as they wait for their food. It's not long before Perry brings them their salads and continues to talk to Waverly.

"So how long are you in town? Maybe we have some time to catch up, if you're not too busy," the man offers.

Waverly nods. "We could always try to work something out," she says with a smile.

Perry takes a pen out of his pocket and quickly jots something down on a piece of paper from his notepad. Her tears the paper off and hands it to the brunette. "Just in case," he says with a smile before he makes his way back toward the kitchen of the restaurant.

"Man, we take you on tour and you’re the one getting numbers?" Nicole teases Waverly as she stares down at the piece of paper in her hands. 

"Ha ha," she says. "I probably won’t even hear from him, we haven’t talked in years," she explains. "Besides, my priority on this trip is you and the book tour," she reminds her. "And don't act like you haven't gotten numbers slid over to you."

Nicole's eyes widen as she receives a warning look from Rosita. "You had to say that in front of mom?" Nicole teases. "And I can promise you, I have not used any of those!"

"I'm going to have to put you on a leash," Rosita teases.

"Apparently I'm not the only one!" Nicole laughs, pointing toward Waverly. "Was that the guy you lost your virginity to at camp?"

Rosita’s eyes widen. "Wow, you’ve just become ten times more interesting," she says. 

"Um, thanks?" Waverly responds, some offense coating her tone. "And no, that wasn’t a guy that I slept with at camp," she says, taking a casual sip from the wine glass in front of her.

Nicole bursts into laughter at the sight of Rosita's jaw practically hitting the table. None of this is any news to her, there's nothing she doesn’t know about Waverly. Any surprise factor about those things went out the window years ago when she realized Waverly isn’t as innocent as she looks. 

"Better watch what you say, Earp, " Rosita says as she takes a sip of her own wine. "You’re going to end up getting hit on twice in one night."

Nicole gives her publicist a glare from across the table, not realizing why that comment bothered her so much. But there is something about the idea of Rosita trying to pursue her best friend that doesn’t sit right with her.

Waverly laughs. "I think I’m going to need a refill," she says, waving her almost empty glass out in front of her.

"Why don’t we find a bar to hit up after dinner? Drinks on me," Nicole offers. "You can invite camp boy, so you're not alone," she suggests.

"You two can go, I have work to do," Rosita answers, quickly.

Nicole scoffs at her. Throughout this entire trip, she can count on one hand where Rosita actually spent time with them outside of the hotel, signings and nightly dinners.

"Oh come on, Rosie. Just one night?" She sticks her bottom lip out, giving her her best pouty face.

Rosita laughs in response. "I have drinks here, why do I need to let you drag me out to a bar as well?"

"To loosen up for once In your life," Nicole tells her.

"It would be fun!" Waverly adds.

Rosita contemplates for another moment as Perry comes back to the table with their food. Waverly offers for him to join them after dinner, but he has a prior engagement and that he wouldn't be free that night. Waverly tells him that it's alright and she will text him when she is free if she has the time. They continue to try to convince Rosita to come out with them throughout the rest of dinner. She's been working hard to make everything run smoothly for the tour, she definitely deserves to let loose from time to time.

"Fine, I'll go," Rosita finally says, receiving cheers from the two other women. She laughs. "But no one can be hung over tomorrow," she warns. "We have work to do."

"Deal," Nicole and Waverly say in unison.

They find a small bar on the edge of town with a sign outside that says 'live music.' Waverly picks it out, she's always been a sucker for a dive bar with live music. Nicole and Rosita follow the brunette into the building as she finds them a seat at the far end of the long, wooden bar. It's not too crowded when they get there, but Nicole assumes it's still early. There is a pool table on one side of the room and a couple of dart boards hanging on the wall. On the opposite side of the building, there is a small stage where someone sits in a chair, playing a guitar and singing into the microphone. It's actually pretty relaxing.

As the night continues and the drinks flow, Rosita becomes more talkative and bubbly than Nicole probably has ever seen her before. She's not sure if she misses the quiet, bossy Rosita that she gets on a daily basis. She coninues to ask Waverly about her camp experiences after getting a glipse of Waverly's past at the restaurant. Rosita had never seemed that interested in anything about Waverly until now, and something about that doesn’t sit right with Nicole.

Waverly is her friend and she’s always been protective of her. She’s always naturally skeptical of anyone who comes close to her, regardless of how well she knows them. She’s already gotten the phone number of one person tonight, now she’s gotten more attention from Rosita than she has since they’ve known each other.

Nicole excuses herself to the bathroom. She points to how close it is to where they are sitting when she’s offered to have someone go with her. She just needs to take a small break for a second alone. She’s in and out rather quickly, but takes a moment to look at herself in the mirror.

Her dark circles are still rather present. She has just sort of accepted the fact that she isn’t going to get much rest until the tour is over. She washes her hands and splashes some water on her face before she returns back into the bar.

Her eyes immediately lock on the women she is there with. Rosita has her hand on Waverly’s back as she leans in closely, speaking into her ear. A fire burns within Nicole that she’s pretty sure she’s never felt before.

“Wow, do you guys need to get your own room, or what?” She huffs as she joins them again, taking her seat at the bar.

Waverly leans back a bit, putting more space between her and Rosita. 

“You wanted me to come out,” Rosita retorts.

“Yeah but I didn’t think you’d be all over Waverly,” she says, looking past her friend at her publicist. Her tone oozes with a bitterness that’s beyond her control.

“She’s not all over me, I just couldn’t hear her with the music playing,” Waverly explains.

“Might as well be,” Nicole argues back.

“Do I sense jealousy, Haught?” Rosita teases. “You’re married...”

“First of all, I’m not married anymore and second of all, I’m not jealous. I just don’t want to be the third wheel,” she explains. 

“Nicole,” Waverly says, softly placing a hand on her arm.

“Oh please, the two of you and your little side conversations and inside jokes,” Rosita says with a laugh. “Like I’m never the third wheel.”

“Okay, guys,” Waverly says, putting her hands up in between the two women. “I think it’s maybe about time to call it a night.”

It’s more of a command than a suggestion. Nicole takes a deep breath, her head spins a bit. She blames her frustration on the alcohol and lack of physical connection she’s felt with anyone in way too long. She doesn't say much on the way back to the hotel, no one really does. Waverly gives her glance after glance, which she knows is the brunette's way of checking on her to make sure she's okay. She just doesn't have much of a desire to talk at the moment, especially not after basically embarrassing herself at the bar.

She's sure she was getting upset over nothing. She tires not to keep thinking about it, not wanting to dwell on something that could definitely be nothing. When she makes it back to her hotel room, she decides to go straight to bed, hoping for a fresh start the next day.

📖 

The tour is halfway over and Nicole is feeling more pressure about writing her next book. She hears it from Rosita and more recently, a little bit from Waverly. Waverly is nicer about it though, she’s always been pretty gentle on her. But most of all, she hears it from herself. She can’t turn it off when her brain tells her she’s setting herself up for failure. It’s loud when her brain tells her she’s not good enough anymore, when it tells her that maybe she shouldn’t have written a series, maybe she shouldn’t have published at all.

She’s in her hotel room after going out to dinner with Rosita, Waverly and the owners of a small bookstore just outside of New Orleans where she did her last signing before they head east. Her computer sits on the table in the room, open, staring back at her. She just got out of the shower, her hair is wet and she runs a towel through it before tossing it to the side. 

She could really use a drink, but doesn’t want to try to convince Rosita to let her go down to the hotel bar. She’s still not big on letting her go anywhere alone, not that anyone is really going to recognize her where they are right now. She doesn’t care much if they do. Maybe she can convince Waverly instead. 

She glances down at her phone, seeing a text from Rosita. She doesn’t even want to open it at this point, but she does anyway. It’s a reminder that she should be writing. Rosita likes to call it ‘encouragement’ but at this point, Nicole refers to it more as ‘annoyance.’ 

She doesn’t respond. She sets her phone down on the nightstand next to her bed. She notices her wedding band sitting on the nightstand as well. She pauses for a moment, running her finger over the piece of metal before leaving it there. She heads out to the balcony of her hotel room into the darkness of the night. She hears a voice nearby and tries not to be nosy, but she recognizes it as Waverly's. She must be on the phone because the conversation is very one sided. 

“Okay, tell them I said ‘hi’ and I’ll talk to you guys soon. Love you,” she says before there’s silence in the air again. 

“Waves?” Nicole calls out. She doesn’t want to scare her or make her think she’s spying. 

“Hey!” Waverly says. She’s cheery as can be.

Nicole leans over in her direction, seeing the brunette coming out of the shadows of the balcony next to her. “What are you doing out here?” 

“If you ask me why I’m not writing I’m never speaking to you again,” Nicole huffs.

She’s only partially joking. 

“Still blocked?” She asks.

Nicole can fully make out the features of Waverly’s face now. She nods. Waverly has always been understanding and patient with Nicole. Basically the complete opposite of Rosita. But that’s why they all work together as a team. Sometimes she needs it from both ends of the spectrum. 

“Rosita’s on my case again,” she groans. “I don’t know how much more I can take before I lose it,” she admits. 

Waverly gives her a sympathetic look. “Do you want to come over here?” She asks. “We can talk.” 

“It’s getting late,” Nicole tells her. “I don’t want to keep you up.”

Waverly gives her a look like she doesn’t believe her. “Has that ever stopped us before?” she laughs. “Come on, you talk to me about everything,” she insists. 

“That’s what used to get me in trouble,” Nicole laughs under her breath. Just because she was bad at communication with her wife, it doesn’t mean she had trouble talking about things with everyone. With Waverly it was always just…easier. 

“Huh?” Waverly asks.

Nicole shakes her head. “Nothing,” she says quickly, shaking her head. “Fine,” she says as she puts her hands on the railing of her balcony. She gives it a little shake to check for sturdiness. She looks down, realizing how far up in the air they actually are. 

Waverly gives her a look, unsure of what she’s about to do. The gap between balconies isn’t that large, but it’s definitely big enough that Nicole could fit through it if she fell. She pushes herself up on the railing, quickly swinging her long leg to the railing on Waverly’s balcony.

“Nicole!” Waverly calls out.

She moves over to her, quickly grabbing her by the arm. Nicole laughs as she practically topples over into the brunette’s arms. After regaining her balance, and making sure Waverly is okay, she starts to laugh.

“I’m here,” she says with a shrug. 

Waverly shakes her head at the redhead. “I meant I could let you in through the door,” she says, gesturing to the hotel room behind her. 

“Where’s the fun in that?” Nicole asks with a smirk. 

“You could have fallen!” Waverly warns, smacking her rather hard on the arm.

“But I didn’t,” Nicole says, pointing a finger toward Waverly. The brunette shakes her head at her again. “Want to know the best part too?” She asks. 

“Sure,” Waverly says. She’s clearly still a little frustrated that Nicole just leaped over the edge of the balcony. 

“I definitely forgot my room key,” Nicole says, laughing at herself, receiving a completely unamused look from the brunette. 

“Then I’m getting you a new one because there’s no way I’m letting you jump over that again!” Waverly warns. 

“Okay, okay,” Nicole says, putting her hands up in front of her. “But that can wait, she says as she plops down in a chair outside of Waverly’s hotel room. 

“So what’s on your mind?” Waverly asks.

She takes a seat in the chair next to Nicole on the balcony. Nicole lets out a dramatic sigh and throws her head back a little. What’s on her mind? Where does she even start? She lets out a laugh instead of answering.

“What’s funny?” the brunette asks.

“There’s a lot on my mind,” Nicole admits. “For starters, this new book,” she says. “I don’t know where to start.” 

“How much do you have written?” Waverly asks.

Nicole remembers the first time she told Waverly she wanted to be a writer. She was terrified. Not that she thought Waverly would judge her, it was just the first time she told anyone that. The brunette was so excited about it, probably more excited than she was. She wanted to read anything and everything that she would write. The first time she saw something she wrote in the hands of her best friend she almost blacked out. Extreme vulnerable barely describes how she was feeling at the time. 

“Every time I write anything, I delete it,” Nicole admits. She waits for a disappointed look from Waverly, but it doesn’t come. “I don’t know, Waves,” she sighs. “I just don’t feel inspired.” 

“Then we need to go back to the beginning here,” the brunette tells her. “Back to the first book, what inspired you then?” She asks. 

“Life was so different then,” Nicole says. “I wasn’t under so much pressure, I wasn’t living a lie,” she stands from the chair she is sitting in and leans up against the railing of the balcony. 

“You mean with Shae?” Waverly asks. 

Nicole nods. “I just always have to be ‘on’ all the time, you know?” She asks. “It’s a show, and it gets exhausting,” she admits. “I just want to be real with people, but I know that’s not the way it works.” 

“Maybe it could,” Waverly tells her.

Nicole looks back at the brunette. She’s giving the redhead her full attention. Nicole starts to pace a little.

“Tell that to Rosita,” Nicole retorts. “Being married is a part of my life that doesn’t exist anymore, and I’m fine with that. I’m just ready to move on,” she says. 

“And what does moving on look like,” Waverly asks. Nicole stops in her tracks and thinks about the question she asked.

“I don’t know,” she groans, plopping back down in the chair next to Waverly. “That’s the thing, now that I’m getting a divorce, I’m not sure what I want,” she admits. “I’m not sure if see myself settling down again anytime soon. Not until I find someone more on my page,” she says with a laugh. 

Nicole came to the conclusion a while ago that she and Shae were never going to completely see eye to eye. Shae is smart, very smart. And driven. Man, is she driven. Not that Nicole isn’t, but Shae is a lot more rigid than her. It’s not often that she strays from the plan, which was difficult for Nicole when she loved to be spontaneous. 

“Yeah, no offense to Shae,” Waverly starts. “But I always saw you with someone different,” she says. 

“Oh yeah?” Nicole asks. 

In all the years that she and Waverly have been friends, she’s never really gotten relationship advice from the brunette. She would listen when Nicole complained about girls in high school. She listened when she thought she met the perfect woman in college. She listened when she told her she got married in Vegas, but she never told her she thought she deserved more. 

“Shae is just too serious,” Waverly tells her. “She’s nice, but she’s focused on herself. You need someone who wants to focus on you a little more.” 

The words shock her a little. Nicole never thinks about whether or not she’s getting enough attention from others. She never really thought about what she truly wanted in another person, she just took what she could get like it was all she deserved. 

“You gonna hook me up with this perfect woman?” Nicole jokes. Waverly laughs. 

“Okay,” Waverly says. “What’s the criteria?” She asks. 

Nicole thinks for a moment. She never really thought she had a type. “Smart,” she says. Waverly gestured with her finger, pretending to check items off of a list, causing Nicole to laugh. “Pretty,” She adds. 

“Smart and pretty,” Waverly says. “I’m sure we will at least have tons of options,” she laughs. 

“If you’re just going to mock me,” Nicole warns. 

“No!” Waverly says with a laugh. She places her hand on Nicole’s arm. “I’m sorry, I was kidding!” She says. “Go on.” 

Nicole laughs. She doesn’t know why she’s even having this conversation, she hasn’t thought about being with someone else in a while. But then again, maybe that’s what she needs, to see what else is out there. 

“Someone who is considerate and kind,” Nicole continues. She thinks about the times when Shae used to put her first. That was mostly in the beginning. That was before she became too busy. Nicole never held it against her when she canceled, but after a while, it takes a toll. “Someone who can make me laugh but knows how to be serious.” 

“Someone like you?” Waverly teases. Nicole huffs and shoots her a look. She’s not just describing herself, right? “Kidding!” Waverly laughs. “You need someone who wants to take care of you from time to time,” she adds.

Nicole looks at her, confused. “I don’t need to be taken care of,” she tells her. She stands from the chair and moves back up against the railing again. 

“Sure,” Waverly laughs. “Says the person who left her key next door and jumped a balcony,” she teases gesturing toward Nicole’s room. 

“You invited me over,” Nicole says with a smirk. She watches as Waverly stands from the chair she is sitting in. She smiles back at the redhead, standing closer to her now. “Besides, why would I need someone else to take care of me when I already have you?” 

“Is that what you keep me around for?” Waverly asks, raising an eyebrow to the redhead. Nicole turns to make eye contact with the brunette. “You’ll have a girl to give you all the physical stuff, but I’m your fluffer?”

“Not completely,” she says. Waverly tilts her head slightly like she’s waiting for another reason from Nicole. “You know all of my deep, dark secrets,” she says. 

Waverly laughs and playfully pushes her shoulder into the redhead’s. Their arms don’t separate quite yet, but they’re no longer making eye contact. 

“Like you don’t know most of mine,” Waverly says with a laugh. 

“Most of them?!” Nicole acts offended.

She pauses and thinks about all of the things she knows about Waverly. They’ve been friends for nearly two decades, she knows she likes to research things when she doesn’t know everything about them. She knows she claims not to be superstitious, but doesn’t like to leave home without her mom’s necklace because she secretly thinks something bad will happen. She knows she thinks she’s a rebel for sneaking into the theatre to see ‘Harry Potter’ a second time right after the first. She knows her favorite food, her favorite color, her favorite movie. 

“Somethings need to stay a mystery,” Waverly teases. 

“Like what?” Nicole asks.

She turns her body, leaning her hip into the railing, facing toward the brunette. 

“If I tell you, it’s not a mystery,” Waverly informs her, booping her on the nose.

Nicole gives her a warning look. Waverly knows she hates it when she does that. Well, she doesn’t really hate it, she doesn’t really hate anything about Waverly. What’s there to hate about Waverly? She’s the nicest person Nicole knows. She doesn’t think there’s a mean bone in her entire body. 

She’s smart and pretty. 

She’s considerate and kind. 

She knows how to make her laugh, but she knows when to be serious-

She squints her eyes a little at the brunette as she thinks. Waverly tilts her head a little to the side, giving her a questioning look. “You okay?” She asks.

Nicole nods and smiles softly back at her. She reaches up with her hand, brushing loose hairs behind her ear. Waverly smiles back at her. Nicole loves the way Waverly’s smile radiates from her cheeks to the squint of her eyes. It lights up any room she’s in, or in this case, she swears it lights up the night sky. 

She doesn’t know how much time passes before she leans in slightly, reading the other woman for a moment. When she doesn’t pull away, she leans in further, lips pressing softly against the brunette’s, hand sliding lightly against her cheek. 

She’s unsure what to expect by kissing Waverly, but she’s pleasantly surprised when she feels the brunette reciprocating the kiss. The kiss starts slow, full of passion. Lips part, tongues brush and fingers become tangled in hair as the kiss becomes more lustful. 

Kissing Waverly isn’t like kissing anyone else she’s ever kissed. Her lips are soft and gentle. Kissing her feels natural, something she never thought she expected but probably shouldn’t be surprising. 

Nicole shifts, lips still connected, squaring up her hips with the brunette’s. Waverly is pressed up against the railing behind her, Nicole presses her body impossibly close to the brunette’s. 

The kiss doesn’t break until someone needs to come up for air. Nicole moves her head back slightly, giving Waverly a bit of space, but feels the brunette press her forehead against her own. She steadies her breath before she opens her eyes again. They stand in silence for a moment. 

“I-” Nicole isn’t sure what to say.

She just took her friendship with Waverly to a whole new level in a moment's time. It’s definitely not what she intended, and she’s not sure where they’re about to go from here. 

She’s surprised again when she feels the brunette’s lips return to hers, cutting her off. She feels like electricity surges through her body as Waverly’s fingertips drag down her back, pressing into her lower back like she wants her closer. Nicole pushes both of her hands into Waverly’s hair behind her head, thumbs brushing lightly on her cheeks. 

They pull away slowly. Nicole moves back to Waverly’s side, giving herself space to think for a moment. She knew if she stayed in front of Waverly, she wouldn’t be able to control herself. 

“I’m not sure where that came from,” Nicole finally speaks. “I probably shouldn’t have-” She turns her head to gauge Waverly’s reaction.

The brunette doesn’t look at her at first, she steadies her breath before turning to make eye contact with her again. Her eyes are soft, which makes Nicole feel a little better about possibly ruining things between them. 

“Hey,” Waverly says. She rubs Nicole’s cheek softly with her hand. “That was not all you,” She reassures her. 

“But we’re friends,” Nicole says.

She feels herself starting to panic. Not only does she now have the pressure of a new book, a divorce, pretending to still be married, and the second half of a book tour, now she has the possibility of things being completely awkward between herself and Waverly.

That’s the last thing she needs. 

She sighs and starts to pace the balcony again. She catches glimpses of Waverly as she walks back and forth. She’s watching her but giving her space for a moment, something Waverly knows Nicole needs when she starts to panic. 

Waverly has always been good at calming Nicole down. She gives her time to get her thoughts a little straightened out before reaching out for her again. 

“Nicole,” Waverly says, softly. Nicole stops pacing and sees the brunette reaching out for her hand. She makes her way toward her, taking her hand as she steps in closer. “You need to take a deep breath,” Waverly says. 

Nicole takes a deep breath in, letting it out slowly. “I just,” She starts. “On top of everything I’m already dealing with, I have to go and make things weird,” she tells her. 

“You didn’t make anything weird,” Waverly reassures her with a soft laugh.

Nicole wants to believe her but she knows things are going to be different. She also knows it’s going to take a lot for her to not want to kiss her again. 

“I kissed you,” Nicole reminds her. 

She holds both of Waverly's hands in her own as she feels that brunette rub gentle circles on her hands with her thumbs. She feels herself relax a bit under her touch.

“And I kissed you back,” Waverly says. A small smile grows on Nicole’s face at the thought of it not being completely one sided. “We’re adults.” 

Right. She’s an adult. She can kiss anyone she wants, with consent of course.

“And if I were to kiss you again?” Nicole asks, boldly. She gives her a dimpled smile. She suddenly feels a surge of confidence throughout her body. 

“I guess you’ll have to find out,” Waverly teases. 

Nicole raises an eyebrow to the brunette. Flirting with Waverly was definitely nothing that she’s used to, but it’s a side of her she definitely likes. 

Nicole doesn’t give her time to change her mind before she leans back in toward the brunette. She’s met halfway by Waverly’s lips against her own. The kiss doesn’t last long, and she immediately misses contact when they pull away. She knows they should probably go back inside soon. She knows they have a flight early in the morning, but that doesn’t stop her from wanting to stay out on the balcony with Waverly. 

“I probably shouldn’t keep you up all night,” Nicole says. "Early flight." She shrugs her shoulders.

She hopes Waverly disagrees. She hopes she tells her it’s fine, that they can stay up all night making out like teenagers on the balcony. But she also fears that if she doesn't stop herself, she might cross some boundaries she's not sure Waverly wants her to, at least not yet.

Waverly gives her a reluctant look at first. She swears there’s a partial pouty lip coming from the brunette. “I should probably go get you that room key,” Waverly says. 

Nicole gives her an apologetic look. She forgot she just locked herself out of her room.

“I’ll go get it,” she says.

“No you will not,” Waverly says, quickly. “Rosita will kill me if I let you go anywhere alone,” she laughs. 

She’s right. But what Rosita doesn’t know won’t kill her. 

“I mean, I can just jump back over,” Nicole gestures over her shoulder toward her room. Waverly doesn’t tell her no, she just gives her a warning look. She feels the brunette grasp at her hip like she’s not going to let her go anywhere. “Fine,” she says with a laugh. 

They make their way inside Waverly’s hotel room. Waverly tells her she’ll be right back. Nicole agrees and settles into the chair in the corner of the room as the brunette leaves the room. She misses her immediately. She's not sure what just happened on the balcony, but she's not interested in stopping herself from finding out either.

Waverly’s room is much cleaner than hers. Not that she’s a messy person, she’s just not as organized as the brunette. That’s something she’s always envied about her. She feels herself sinking further into the chair, exhaustion starting to take over. She leans her head back and closes her eyes for a brief moment. 

“I leave you alone for five minutes and you’re already asleep?” Waverly calls out as she enters her room again. Nicole smiles, eyes still closed. “And you were worried about keeping me up,” Waverly says. 

Nicole opens her eyes and stands up from the chair. “I was resting my eyes,” Nicole argues. Waverly laughs and shakes her head. She holds the room key for Nicole to take. “Thanks.” 

She smiles and reaches out for the card. She presses her hand flat against Waverly’s with the card in between their hands, lacing their fingers together, pulling the brunette closer to her body. Waverly smiles and pushes up on her toes, pressing a kiss against Nicole’s lips. 

“What was that for?” Waverly asks with a smile, hands still pressed against Nicole’s. 

“Making sure I wasn’t imagining it,” Nicole says.

Waverly laughs and shakes her head. “You’re not imagining it,” the brunette says, almost in a whisper. 

“What are we doing?” Nicole finally asks.

As the words come out of her mouth, she’s afraid Waverly is going to think she regrets it. Maybe Waverly isn’t just the fluffer in her life. Maybe there is something more there. More than just feeling more comfortable with her than anyone else. More than wanting to be around her whenever she can, more than missing her when they don’t see each other for a while. 

“We’re kissing,” Waverly responds, smiling sweetly, easing Nicole's nerves a bit.

She smiles back at the brunette. “Well that much I know,” she laughs. 

She presses a few more kisses against the brunette’s lips. She finds it hard to stop. She has so many questions that she wants to ask, but doesn’t want to complicate it, not now. 

“Let it be that then,” Waverly says between kisses. 

Nicole wonders if Waverly has been expecting this moment. She wonders if she was the only one completely oblivious to something building between the two of them. But was she completely oblivious, or just blind?

Was it really just the alcohol the night in San Francisco when felt something inside of her as she helped unzip Waverly's dress for her? Did she feel a connection with Waverly before the book signing in Texas when they shared a silent moment together, lost in each other's eyes? Did she feel jealousy when Waverly ran into an old friend from camp because of the way he looked at her? Did she fee rage inside of her as she watched Rosita hit on Waverly at the bar because she felt like a third wheel or because she didn’t want anyone else to have her?

Did she bring Waverly with her because she’s her best friend or because she knew that deep down, she didn’t want to be without her?

She wonders why she can’t just shut her brain off for a minute to enjoy the moment.

She can’t help but deepen the kiss. She feels her body craving more, hands moving from being tangled in Waverly’s hair to her hips. She tries not to cross the line or go too far too soon. The last thing she wants to do is disrespect the woman in front of her. 

She lets her hand settle on the small of the brunette’s back, fingers brushing lightly on the small amount of exposed skin. She feels Waverly pressing her body against her own again. It feels like fire on her skin. Skin that hasn’t been touched by another person in quite awhile. Skin that aches for contact. 

Her right hand slips lower, cupping the brunettes ass as she bucks her hips slightly toward her. Waverly doesn’t seem to mind as she moves with the redhead. Nicole can feel her heart beating out of her chest as pressure continues to build where she craves it the most. She feels the brunette’s tongue sweep against her own, a small moan escaping her lips. The last thing she wants to do is stop kissing her, but she knows if she doesn’t it’ll go too far. 

She pulls back just enough to catch her breath, forehead pressed against a Waverly’s. They breath together for a moment before she finally speaks. 

“I should probably-" she trails off, gesturing toward the hotel room door behind her.

Waverly nods. "Yeah," she breathes out.

"I just-" Nicole tries to explain.

"It’s okay,” Waverly says, with an understanding smile. “Like you said, we have an early flight. It probably wouldn’t be good for Rosita to come looking for you and find you in here."

"Right," she says, still not wanting to move from her position.

"Are you pouting?" the brunette teases.

"Never," Nicole dramatically scoffs.

Waverly rolls her eyes. "Sure."

"I just-"

She leans in for another kiss. It’s not like getting physical with Waverly never crossed her mind before, she’s gorgeous. But there’s something about actually kissing her that keeps leaving her wanting more. She knows now, more than ever, that she’s going to have to force herself to leave before she can’t. She pulls away again, this time creating more space between the pair, and points toward the door.

"Do you want me to walk you?" Waverly calls out behind her.

"No,” she says, quickly. Realizing that probably sounded rude. “I mean-” she catches herself. Waverly looks back at her. “Can I be 100% honest?”

"Of course."

“If you walk me to my room, I’m going to want you to come inside,” she admits. 

It’s been a while since she’s kissed anyone other than Shae, and even that hasn’t been recently. There was the one time alcohol factored in and they got a little carried away, making her wonder if they were making the right choice to even follow through with the divorce. 

But things with Waverly are different. She’s not just a hook up. She might need time to process everything that just happened, but she would never make Waverly feel like she’s less important than she is. 

Waverly’s cheeks blush a bit at the response. “Okay, fair.”

"Goodnight then?" she asks, putting her hand out in front of her like she's about to give the woman a handshake.

She looks down at her hand, confused, but unable to drop it to her side right away.

Waverly laughs and takes her hand, shaking it in return. "Goodnight, Nicole," she says with a grin.

"Goodnight," Nicole says again, unable to break her stare on the brunette.

"Nicole," Waverly says.

“Sorry,” she laughs. “Goodnight.” She finally drops her hand to her own side, nodding at the brunette, a dimpled smile plastered on her face.

She turns toward the door, fighting temptation to look back at Waverly again. She pushes the door open and makes her way out into the hallway.

She closes the door behind her, leaning her back up against the cold wood of the door. She closes her eyes for a moment, the feeling of Waverly’s lips linger on her own. She can’t help but smile in the moment, everything suddenly feeling right in the world as if a flip had switched that she never knew existed. 

When she makes it back to her own room, her mind races with thoughts of everything just happened over the course of the last hour. She wonders if Waverly’s mind is doing the same thing. She wonders if the brunette is going to regret kissing her once it all sinks in. She wonders if she’s going to wake up in the morning wanting to kiss her again.

She has so many questions, but she’s willing to wait for the answers. 


	3. The East

The next morning, there’s a loud knock on her hotel room door, causing Nicole to jolt awake. She realizes she’s still sitting at the table in her room, hunched over toward her computer. Her face is resting on her arms that are crossed on the edge of the table. She couldn’t have been asleep long, and she’s sure it shows. 

When she returned back to her room the night before, the first thing she saw was her computer sitting on the table, still open, still waiting for words to be written. 

Something in her had changed after her moment had shared with Waverly. A spark reignited. She felt her passion for writing returning, ideas flowed more naturally, so she wrote.

And the writing came more naturally than she expected. 

“Shit!”

She jumps up when she looks at the time on the clock on her nightstand. She makes her way across the room and looks through the peephole of the hotel room door to see her publicist, looking slightly frustrated outside the door. 

She sees her go to knock once more, a little louder this time. The sound rings through her ears due to how close she is to the door.

“Fuck, Rosita,” she groans.

She wishes it was Waverly at the door instead. She’s softer, more understanding and Nicole knows she wouldn’t come into her room yelling like Rosita is about to. 

Nicole takes a breath, which turns into more of a yawn before she opens the door, moving to the side to allow the woman to enter.

“Are you serious, Nicole? You haven’t packed? We need to be at the airport in 30 minutes!” Rosita frantically spits questions at the redhead, making her way further into the room. 

Nicole glances out in the hallway, hoping to see Waverly nearby, coming to help keep her calm. She wonders why she isn’t there yet, packed and ready to go.

Did she oversleep also?

Maybe she doesn’t want to see Nicole this morning.

She tries to push the doubt from her mind.

“Huh? Uh, yeah, sorry,” she says.

Her voice is a little groggy. She props the door open with the stopper, still assuming that Waverly will be joining them at some point before they leave for the airport. She rubs the back of her neck with her hand and turns back into her room, watching Rosita looking around the room. 

“What were you doing all night?” Rosita asks.

Nicole pauses for a moment before she responds. She thinks back to talking to Waverly on the balcony the night before. She thinks about finally being able to talk and be open about everything with someone who understands her. She thinks about how she started to see Waverly in a different light.

Her brain flashes like a photo montage of scenes from the night before.

Waverly’s smile.

Her eyes.

Her lips. 

Something clicked and now she’s all she can think about. She remembers the feeling of Waverly’s lips on her own. She still feels her body against hers. 

“Writing,” she responds, nonchalantly, gesturing to the computer sitting open on the table.

She starts to pick up some of her belongings, packing them back into her suitcase. Her body is tired and sluggish, but she tries to move as fast as she can, not worrying about the condition of her clothes as long as she gets them packed.

“Wait,” Rosita stops moving around the room and looks back at Nicole. “You wrote?” she asks.

Nicole can’t tell if she’s surprised or impressed. She nods, trying not to make a big deal out of it. She doesn’t want to hype herself up if this ends up being a one time thing, but she is still feeling the change inside of her.

“There’s words on that page that aren’t deleted?”

Rosita has every right to be shocked. Nicole would probably be more shocked if she could think straight and wasn’t as tired as she is right now.

“A lot of them. I’m not sure when I fell asleep,” Nicole explains. “But I found some inspiration last night and didn’t want to lose it,” she says as she continues to pack her bags. 

She hopes she doesn’t get too many questions about where the inspiration came from. She knows Rosita is going to be less than thrilled about something happening between her and Waverly and she doesn’t plan on breaking that news to her anytime soon. She doesn’t even know what it all means yet. Nicole quickly hustles by Rosita, heading to the bathroom to collect the rest of her belongings. 

“Haught,” Rosita calls out.

She seems excited. More excited than Nicole has heard the woman in a while, which is a great change from the frustration that she has been getting from her lately.

“I could serious kiss you!” Rosita screams. 

Nicole laughs and sticks her head out of the bathroom.

“What?” she calls back at her.

She glances at herself in the mirror for a moment. She can’t even begin to pretend that she looks good. Her hair is a bit of a mess, her eyes are accompanied by some enormous dark circles and, overall, she just looks completely exhausted. It’s not like she hasn’t looked tired in weeks, but the complete lack of sleep really shines in this moment.

“Who’s kissing who?” Waverly’s voice comes echoing through the hotel room.

Nicole feels herself panic for a brief moment. She tries to fix her hair up a little, splashing water on her face to look a little more presentable before she makes her way back out into the room.

She stops and shakes her head at herself in the mirror.

“What am I doing?” she asks. “It’s Waverly.”

Waverly has seen her in several different weird stages throughout their lifetime, why is she acting like this now?

She steps out of the bathroom, and heads back over to her suitcase. She tries not to really look toward the brunette yet, not wanting to draw too much attention to anything out of the ordinary. She packs the rest of her belongings into her suitcase and zips it closed.

“No one is kissing anyone,” Nicole tells her.

She makes brief eye contact with Waverly before turning her direction to Rosita.

“You’re not going to kiss me,” she warns. 

“I’m just happy!” Rosita says, cheerfully.

Nicole strangely misses when Rosita is frustrated with her. It was something she got used to and this new, cheery Rosita is freaking her out.

“I’m confused,” Waverly admits. 

“I wrote last night,” Nicole says. “Fell asleep doing so and now I’m going to make us late.”

She goes over to her computer and closes it, packing it away with the rest of her belongings. She sets her suitcase on the floor with her computer bag on top.

When she looks up, she sees both women staring back at her with smiles on their faces.

“What?” she asks.

She’s exhausted, so the excitement of what could possibly be the end of her writer's block hasn’t really sunken in yet.

“Nicole, that’s amazing!” Waverly says in a cheerful tone.

Nicole can’t help but smile back at the brunette. Her eyes narrow in on her like she’s the only other person in the room. She wants to hug her, she wants to talk to her about what she wrote, she even wants to give it to her to read and secretly freak out until she’s done and can give her opinion of it. 

“Sure,” Rosita huffs. “You’re happy when she’s excited for you!”

Nicole quickly shifts, she’s suddenly uncomfortable like she just got caught doing something she shouldn’t be doing.

“What?” she asks. “No, I just,” she stutters, causing Rosita to laugh. “I’m too tired for this,” she groans. “You guys ready?” she asks, changing the subject. 

They collect their bags and make their way out of the hotel, meeting their car that’s waiting to give them a ride to the airport. 

Nicole climbs into the backseat, immediately leaning her head back on the headrest, closing her eyes. She feels Waverly slide in next to her. She knows it’s Waverly because she can hear Rosita in the front seat, talking to the driver. That, and the fact that Rosita most likely wouldn’t be sitting so close to her.

She squints her eyes open briefly when she feels the brunette tap her on the leg. She rolls her head toward Waverly, seeing her looking back at her.

“What’s up?” she asks. 

Waverly leans in toward the redhead, turning her mouth toward her ear.

“So you really wrote last night?” she whispers.

Nicole’s breath hitches when she feels Waverly’s warm breath against her skin.

She smiles and nods back at her. 

“I felt inspired,” Nicole whispers back. 

“I can’t wait to read it,” Waverly tells her.

They continue to whisper back and forth for a moment. They’re cut off by Rosita coughing to gain their attention. They look up toward the front of the car. 

“What are you two whispering about?” Rosita asks like she is suspicious of them. 

“Nothing,” Nicole says, quickly. 

Waverly leans back toward her side of the car, separating a little from the redhead, but not before she feels the brunettes fingers drag down her leg. Her mind immediately wanders back to the night before. The taste of Waverly’s lips and the feel of her body against her own occupy her senses. 

The rest of the car ride to the airport is more quiet. Nicole doesn’t want Rosita to keep questioning them. She knows they’ve been friends forever, she doesn’t usually she doesn’t ask them about what they’re talking about. 

She closes her eyes again, leaning her head back into the back of the seat. There’s only a few more minutes until they arrive at the airport. The traffic heading into flight arrivals is fairly backed up. Nicole opens her eyes when she hears Rosita panicking about the possibility of missing their flight. She tries not to be too worried about it, assuming that they’ll find something else if they do. 

She’s surprised when she feels Waverly’s fingers brush lightly against her own. She tilts her head slightly in the brunette’s direction, giving her a soft, dimpled smile. She wants to reach over, taking Waverly’s hand in her own. She wants to lean in and kiss her again. 

She wishes she had another moment alone with the brunette. She wants to talk to her without being interrupted. She wants to be close to her again without being questioned.

When the car finally comes to a stop, the three woman exit the vehicle and collect their bags. Rosita gestures for the pair to follow her as usual. Nicole sees Waverly picking up her backpack and slinging it over her shoulder. She wants to offer to carry it for her, but refrains.

Rosita leads them into the airport, walking rather quickly. Nicole assumes it’s because she’s afraid they’re about to miss their flight. She feels bad about making them late, but she’s willing to pay the price for the possible end to her writer’s block.

As they reach security, they go through all the typical steps to prepare for the metal detectors; bags on the conveyor belt, shoes off, anything metal off, toiletries out.

Nicole doesn’t even realize it when she’s placing her hand on Waverly’s lower back to guide her in front of her. Rosita is far enough in front that she probably doesn’t even see, but Nicole catches herself and quickly removes it. Waverly smiles up at her and she smiles and shrugs in return.

They make their way through the metal detectors and begin to collect their belongings on the other side. Nicole reaches across the conveyor belt to retrieve one of Waverly’s bags for her. The brunette thanks her and that share another small moment of locked eyes and grins from ear to ear.

She forgets for a moment that there’s anyone else in the world. That is, until Rosita tells them to move it along so they can make it to their gate on time. She leads them through the airport to “Gate C16” only to find out the flight has been delayed.

She sees Rosita relax a bit as she sets her bags down and takes a seat in an empty chair. Nicole follows suit and does the same. Waverly sets her bags down in a chair next to Nicole, but doesn’t sit yet. She excuses herself to the bathroom, asking if the pair can watch her bags.

Nicole nods her head and Waverly thanks her before turning toward the bathroom sign behind her. Nicole’s eyes are tired, but it doesn’t stop her from focusing on Waverly as she walks away, appreciating the other woman’s body and how hot she looks even when she walks away.

“What’s up with you guys?” Rosita asks when they’re finally alone.

Nicole blinks her eyes a few times, breaking her stare, before she turns toward her publicist.

“Huh?”

“You and Waverly,” Rosita explains.

She gestures toward the direction that the brunette was just walking in.

“What do you mean?” Nicole asks.

She reaches into the side of her bag to retrieve her water bottle. She takes a sip and looks back up at Rosita, not really wanting to entertain the interrogation.

“You guys are being weird,” she tells her. “Well, mostly you. Are you up to something?”

Nicole sighs and leans back in her chair. She’s definitely too tired for this.

“Rosita, I told you, I’m just tired. I was up all night writing,” Nicole reminds her.

“Okay, well, I don’t think I have to review the rules with you, do I?” she asks.

Nicole tries to replay the last couple of hours in her head, trying to muster up some kind of explanation for why Rosita would be choosing right now to question her relationship with Waverly. So she might have just checked out her ass in the airport, but she doesn’t think she’s acted any differently toward the brunette since Rosita has been present.

“I’m a grown woman, Rosita,” she grunts.

She leans her head back further, closing her eyes for a moment in attempts to ignore the other woman.

“Who has an image to keep,” Rosita reminds her.

“An imagine that you created, you mean?” Nicole retorts, eyes still closed. “Look,” she says as she opens her eyes and shifts in her seat, turning her body to face Rosita. “I get it. But that’s Waverly, she’s my best friend. We always whisper in backseat of Ubers. Why are you being weird about it now?” she questions.

Instead of explaining her accusations, Rosita gives her a look that says she can read right through her.

“I know it’s not ideal. Nicole. But we need to work with what we’ve got.”

“And what about me? What about my happiness? My marriage ending isn’t the end of the world. We’ve handled it like adults.” She finally cracks her tough exterior for a second, blaming it on her exhaustion.

“I know, Nicole. I just want you to focus on the book right now. We can take care of it when we get home. But we can’t have some sort of affair scandal on our hands,” Rosita explains.

It wouldn’t be a scandal if Rosita just let her be her and didn’t try to control everything she does in her personal life.

“Waverly is my best friend, Rosita,” she says what she didn’t think she’d have to explain over and over again. “She’s been with me since the beginning of the tour. Nobody is question anything with her. And I’m not sure why you’re suddenly on my case about it.”

“I know you. I know how you look at people,” Rosita tells her. “And I know when you’re getting overly defensive when you don’t want to talk about something.”

“I’m just annoyed that you’re even bringing this up right now,” Nicole explains.

“This sudden inspiration is great, but it doesn’t feel like it came unwarranted,” her publicist tells her.

“You know nothing,” Nicole spits, becoming more frustrated. “How about you just be glad I’m finally doing what you want me to do and stay off my case about what scenarios you’re dreaming up in your head?”

From the corner of her eye, she sees Waverly making her way through the crowd of people and back over to where they are sitting.

“Just be careful, Nicole,” Rosita says. “Please.”

“Sure thing, Rosita” Nicole says.

She makes eye contact with Waverly, who gives her a look like she knows something is wrong.

“Anything you say,” she mumbles, looking back in Rosita’s direction.

Waverly looks back and forth between the pair as she sits down in one of the seats between them.

“Are you two fighting?” she huffs.

Waverly likes to keep things peaceful when she can, but Nicole doesn’t really feel like she could help this particular situation.

“Rosita just wants to control me again,” Nicole tells her, not caring that Rosita is sitting right there, listening to everything she says.

“It’s business, Nicole,” Rosita reminds her.

“Well, maybe I don’t like the way you run your business,” the redhead snaps.

She catches a glimpse of the shock on Waverly’s face at her lack of ability to keep her cool in this moment.

“Okay, okay,” Waverly says, putting her hands out toward the women that surround her. She turns toward Nicole. “Knock it off,” she warns.

“You’re kidding right?”

The redhead becomes defensive. She’s complete taken aback by the brunette telling _her_ to knock it off when Rosita was the one that started it. She doesn’t even care that she sounds like a child, she’s pissed and way too tired to deal with this.

“I’m going to take a walk,” she huffs as she stands from her seat. She doesn’t take the time to look at either of the other women.

“Let me come with y-”

“No, I’ll be alright,” she turns and shakes her head at Waverly.

She really doesn’t want a chaperone right now. She just wants to be alone; something she rarely has been able to do in weeks.

She sees Waverly look at Rosita, who nods in approval. Even if Rosita argued with her, it wasn’t going to stop her from walking away from them.

She makes her way down the terminal with no particular destination in mind. She doesn’t really notice how far she’s walked, only caring around getting away from Rosita for a bit and feeling like she can finally breathe.

She’s a little annoyed at Waverly for not just taking her side on things, but her rational side understands that the brunette probably has not idea why she was upset in the first place. Waverly was probably just trying to keep the peace within the group and reduce any tension for the rest of the tour.

She ends up turning a corner and finally feels like she’s made it far enough away to take a moment to herself. She finds a spot against a nearby wall that doesn’t seem to be too crowded.

She takes advantage of the empty space and leans up against the wall, spending a few minutes casually people watching. There’s a pillar close enough to hide behind so if someone comes looking for her, they might not find her at first.

She’s not sure how much time passes before she catches a glimpse of a familiar brunette, looking from side to side. When she spots Nicole standing by the pillar, she gives her a soft smile and heads in her direction.

“You alright?”

The brunette leans against the wall next to her. Her tone is soft like she’s treading water, unsure of how the redhead is going to respond.

“I’m fine,” Nicole tells her.

Waverly gives her a look. “We both know I know you better than that, Nicole.”

Nicole let’s out an audible sigh, turning her body toward the brunette’s. She can’t even pretend like she’s actually too mad to want to talk to Waverly.

“Rosita can be such an ass sometimes,” she says.

“I know,” Waverly tells her.

Nicole looks back at her, surprised. This might be the first time she’s agreed with her when she’s said something like that.

“She’s just trying to protect you, and she thinks she knows how to do that,” the brunette tries to explain.

“Well, she doesn’t,” Nicole tells her.

She knows what her intentions are, but it doesn’t make it any less frustrating when she continues to treat her that way.

“You’re also being really defensive,” Waverly adds.

Nicole immediately feels herself put a wall up around her emotions again. She’s exhausted and it’s not just because she didn’t sleep the night before. She’s tired of hearing how she should and shouldn’t feel. She’s tired of hiding. She’s tired of pretending.

She’s just tired.

“I thought you were on my side here,” she huffs, leaning back against the wall again, no longer facing the brunette.

“There doesn’t have to be sides here, Nicole,” Waverly tries to reason with her.

“She’s just trying to control everything I do! I’m an adult, Waves.”

“Trust me,” Waverly replies. She moves a little closer to Nicole, lightly brushing her arm with her fingers. “I know you are and your decisions are your decisions. But Rosita just wants to make sure you’re focused on your book as well.”

“I’m finally writing and she still finds something to be on my case about,” Nicole says.

She gives into Waverly’s touch and turns in her direction again.

“Well, I may have yelled at her a little for you,” the brunette admits.

A proud smile appears on her lips.

Nicole is a little shocked at first. Waverly doesn’t really yell at anyone. But when she cares enough about something, she has seen her get pretty fired up.

“You did?”

Waverly nods.

“What did you tell her?”

“That you’re doing your best here and maybe she should lighten up a little,” she says as she drags her fingers down Nicole’s side, gently, hooking them into the pocket of her jeans.

“And what did she say?” Nicole continues to ask, leaning into her touch even more.

“That she only has your best interest at heart,” Waverly recalls. “And then I told her I believe that, but she also has to let you breathe a little. You’re going through a lot and feeling like you’re being watched all the time can be overwhelming.”

Nicole can’t help but smile. She feels an instant calm fall over her. She places her hand on Waverly’s arm, brushing her skin lightly with her thumb. The space between them becomes minimal in the time they spend talking.

“What were you guys even fighting about anyway?” Waverly finally asks.

Nicole remembers that Waverly wasn’t even there during her conversation with Rosita. And she’s now realizing that Rosita didn’t seem to have lectured Waverly on the subject, just her. 

“She told me to be careful,” Nicole says, leaving out basically every other detail of the conversation.

“With what?” Waverly asks, her eyebrow furrows in confusion.

“You.”

“What?” The brunette asks, more confused now.

She’s glad she’s not the only one confused about why Rosita chose this day to start asking questions when they’ve spent some of their down time together throughout the tour. They often ask Rosita to join them when they go places, or just hang out together, and she usually turns them down. All she knows is she is not about to stop hanging out with Waverly now, just because her publicist wants to be controlling.

“She thinks we were being weird today and immediately associated it with there being more going on between us,” she explains. “She apparently can’t just accept the fact that I finally found inspiration and so what if it probably has everything to do with you.”

She finds herself rambling and quickly stops before she word vomits all over to the point of no return.

Waverly smiles back at her. She rests her other hand on Nicole’s side. Their hips are now squared and she doesn’t care how close she’s standing to the other woman.

“It does?” the brunette asks.

Nicole nods.

“My mind was racing with ideas when I got back to my room, I had to write it all down.”

She places a hand on Waverly’s lower back.

“Well, I’m proud of you. I knew you could do it!”

Hazel eyes stare back at her.

“That means more to me than you’ll ever know,” Nicole tells her. “Sorry if I’ve made things more complicated for you. Rosita is relentless about my imagine. I’m not trying to act weird toward you either when she’s around, I just would rather her not think anything is going on. It’s easier that way.”

“And is there?” the brunette asks in a teasing tone.

The smile on her face is enough for Nicole to realize she probably already knows the answer.

“Is there what?” Nicole teases back, a dimpled grin on her face.

Waverly scoffs in response to her teasing.

“Anything going on,” she says. 

“Do you want there to be?” Nicole asks.

She hopes she knows the answer by now.

“I don’t want to get you into trouble,” Waverly tells her.

“Oh please,” Nicole says. “I know how to get into trouble all on my own,” she says with a wink. 

“That’s definitely true,” the brunette agrees.

She presses her hand against Nicole’s abs. The redhead feels her muscles tighten slightly under her touch.

“You never answered my question though,” Nicole reminds her.

“Which question?” Waverly teases back.

“Do you want there to be something between us?”

“Do you?” she counters.

Nicole leans in, capturing the brunettes lips with her own. It’s something she’s been dying to do since she first saw her this morning.

Waverly reciprocates the kiss right away. Nicole feels her hands grasping at the material of the bottom of her shirt as if she’s using it to somehow get closer to her.

She smiles into the kiss, realizing she didn’t take anytime to care about who could be watching them in that moment. The thought doesn’t stop her from continuing to kiss the woman in front of her. The only thing that does stop her is her lungs finally screaming for air.

“I’ll take that as a yes,” Waverly breathes out, pressing her forehead against Nicole’s.

The redhead smiles and nods against Waverly’s forehead as she slowly peels her eyes open. When they pull apart, she finds herself slowly looking around them and she’s partially surprised at what she sees.

There are people walking quickly to different gates, people looking down at their boarding passes, talking to the people they are with, laughing, enjoying their time. She doesn’t catch a single eye looking in her direction; not one. No one is staring at them, no one is judging them, no one even cares what they are doing because they have their own lives to worry about.

"Yeah," Nicole says softly. She takes Waverly's hand in her own, fingers intertwining. "I'd like that very much," she admits.

Waverly smiles and pushes up on her toes, pressing another quick kiss against her lips. It was soft and sweet, but with no other intensions but to almost 'seal it with a kiss.' Nicole smiles in return and leans back up against the wall for a moment.

"We should probably get back to mom," she says, rolling her eyes a little.

Waverly laughs and nods her head. She pulls on the redhead's hand, dragging her in the direction back toward their gate. By the time they come back around the corner, their hands are no longer connected and Nicole misses it immediately.

She feels herself wanted to reach for her hand again, wanting to say "fuck it" and not care who sees her. She wants to do what makes her happy and as far as she's concerned, the two things that have consistently made her happy are being a writer and Waverly.

Unfortunately, she can only flaunt one of those right now. Maybe it's not so bad. Maybe keeping something to herself is alright for now. Maybe it's worth hiding part of her as long as at the end of the day, she can still be with Waverly.

Her mind continues to race as she rubs her face and shakes her head in attempts to stifle some of her thoughts. She can't help but think about how just twenty four hours ago, her biggest worry was whether or not she was going to actually be able to produce a new novel and complete her book series. Now all she wants to do is kiss her best friend.

Life just got more complicated.

They return to Rosita's side and the woman seems to have a softer exterior than she did when Nicole left. She surprisingly apologizes to Nicole, which she appreciates, but doesn't want to accept at first. It doesn't stop her from being annoyed, but she finds herself smiling and accepting the apology after Waverly's elbow hits her in the ribs.

Feeling a little better about the situation, she takes a seat next to Rosita and leans back, slouching to get more comfortable. She crosses her arms across her chest and and tilts her head back, closing her eyes. She feels the exhaustion taking over and hopes to board the plane soon so she can actually sleep.

She feels the brunette plop down in the seat next to her. Her knee presses up against Nicole’s leg and she does nothing to move it away from her. Nicole tries to hide her smile, but fails, and can’t seem to quiet the butterflies in her stomach.

📖

By the time they land in North Carolina, Nicole feels more rested. The flight wasn’t long enough to get a lot of sleep, but even just being able to rest made her feel a lot better. Rosita starts asking about her new book, but with a little less aggression and more of what seems like interest in what she is writing.

Nicole tells her a little about it, but wants to leave most of it as a mystery for when she finally gets to read it. Waverly tries to get her to tell her more about it as well, but her tactics are a little more convincing and usually occur when they’re behind closed doors.

In between tour activities and dinners with Rosita, as they continue their travels up the east coast, she finds herself writing in her room with Waverly usually hanging out on the bed behind her. At times, it’s a distraction, but she doesn’t ever ask her to go away to help her focus better. She does find herself taking more breaks when Waverly is in her room though.

“You need to keep writing,” Waverly says with a laugh as Nicole makes her way over to her on the bed for the fourth time that evening.

Waverly is sitting on the edge with her feet on the floor. Nicole ignores her command and straddles the brunette’s legs, cupping her face with her hands, tilting her head up toward her.

“I will,” Nicole assured her. “But first I need to kiss you.”

“You _need_ to?” the brunette questions in a teasing tone, a big grin on her face.

“Mmhmm,” the redhead hums, leaning down toward the other woman. “I need to very badly,” she says, a dimpled grin plastered on her face.

“Well, I don’t want to deprive you of your needs,” Waverly tells her, eyes narrowing, smiling growing.

Nicole slowly leans further down until her lips reach Waverly’s. They brush softly at first before she feels Waverly push further into her kiss. The brunette brings her arms up, looping them behind Nicole’s neck, deepening the kiss.

She feels the brunette’s tongue brush against her own and an involuntary moan escapes her lips. She has trouble stopping herself from pushing her back into the bed and having her way with her, but she refrains.

They haven’t taken it any further than heavy make out sessions and the occasional roaming hands, but that doesn’t stop Nicole’s mind from wandering every time she’s near the woman.

She hasn’t really tried to move things further either. She’s honestly afraid to ruin things or make Waverly feel like that’s all she wants out of her. After all, she hasn’t even been able to even take her out on a date or anything more formal than sneaking around in their hotel rooms.

“Feel better?” Waverly asks, forehead pressed up against Nicole’s, still breathing heavy.

“Hmm?” Nicole asks, her mind still foggy from her racing hormones and lack of blood in her brain.

“You said you _needed_ to kiss me,” the brunette reminds her.

“Oh yeah,” Nicole laughs. “Much better,” she says with a wink as she leaves a soft kiss on Waverly’s nose.

Nicole stands back up, stretching her back that had started to tighten from the angle she was leaning in. Waverly’s hands move to her hips.

“What are you thinking about?” the brunette asks.

Nicole gives her a puzzled look.

“You’re thinking about something,” she tells her.

Waverly always knows when she’s thinking about something. She can pretend all she wants, but the brunette has always been able to read her like a book.

“I want to take you on a date,” she admits, unsure of whether or not that’s something that Waverly wants.

They’ve been out together plenty of times throughout this trip, but never with romance on the mind. Things are different now, a good different, and she wants to show Waverly that’s she’s serious about whatever this is between them.

The smile on Waverly’s face gives her an indication that the feeling is mutual.

“You want to take me on a date?” she asks, smiling so big it reaches her eyes.

Nicole nods. “If you want,” she adds.

“I’d love to,” Waverly beams.

Nicole feels her heart swell. She can’t even remember a time she’s felt like this about another human before. Seeing Waverly light up with happiness makes everything that she’s ever been upset about disappear like it never even mattered in the first place.

She doesn’t think about the stress she’s been under since they left for the tour. She doesn’t think about the pressure of writing another book. She doesn’t think about signing the final divorce papers when she gets home. All she can think about is how happy the woman in front of her is making her in that moment.

“Tomorrow,” she says. “After the signing. I’m sure we can’t shake Rosita to have dinner together, but how about after dinner? It’ll be our first official date.”

“That sounds wonderful,” Waverly says as she stands up from the bed, arms wrapping around Nicole’s middle. “Now you better get back to writing so I don’t get you in trouble,” she adds with a wink.

Nicole lets out an audible groan and turns back toward her computer. She plops down in the chair and tries to refocus on writing words down. When she tries turning around in the chair, Waverly threatens to leave and go back to her room. Nicole quickly protests and continues to write.

📖

During the book signing the next day, most of her focus is on her date with Waverly later that night. She tries to go through the motions of the event without appearing to be too distracted. No one else seems to notice, so it’s probably mostly just in her head.

She breezes through the public speaking part without flaw, finding herself to be more excited about her upcoming book now that the story is coming together more. She’s thinks she might finally know how to wrap up the trilogy and feels confident in herself and her ability to write again.

She signs more autographs than she can count. Waverly usually takes care of the numbers part anyway, so she never really pays attention. She finds conversation with others to be easy with the less stress she’s usually feeling. She chats with each person as they approach her table. She’s even able to ignore the wedding band that she continues to wear on her left hand, something that usually catches her eye several times a day.

At times she feels Waverly’s fingers brush against her leg under the table, and other times she rests her entire hand on her thigh. It's comfortable and feels natural to the redhead. She does start to notice a pattern, however, that whenever a woman starts to become a little too friendly toward Nicole for Waverly's liking, her hand tends to make its way further up her thigh. Nicole can't help but laugh to herself at the possibly jealous, but definitely territorial side of Waverly, something she hasn't really ever experienced before.

"Thanks again for signing my book," a woman says with a quick wink before she turns to head in the opposite directions of the table.

"Anytime!" Nicole replies, a friendly smile on her face.

Waverly's hand squeezes Nicole's thigh, causing her muscles to tighten under her touch. Nicole turns and gives the brunette a look.

"What?" Waverly asks, flashing her an innocent smile in return.

Nicole laughs and drops her hand underneath the table for a brief moment, setting it on top of Waverly's. She gives her hand a reassuring squeeze, followed by her thumb rubbing soft circles on her skin. She feels Waverly's grip loosen on her knee as if she got her secret message that she doesn't have anything to worry about.

📖

After dinner that night, Rosita, as usual, excuses herself back to the hotel room. Nicole often wonders what Rosita does every night when she doesn't want to spend time with them. She's made comments to her about turning into a pumpkin after a certain time, but Rosita never really thought she was too funny. She's all business and no play sometimes, something that Nicole doesn't think she'll ever get behind.

After going to their separate rooms to freshen up before going back out, there's a knock at her door. Nerves suddenly fill her insides and she trues to brush them away.

It's just Waverly, her friend since they were 5 years old. But things are different now. She's not just Waverly, her friend. She's Waverly, someone she's about to go on a first date with. She's Waverly, someone she can't stop thinking about.

She's Waverly-

She quickly pulls the door open toward her and her eyes widen at the sign of the brunette, dressed in a short, blue sundress. Her hair flows down past her shoulders in perfect waves. Nicole feels her breath catch in her throat as her eyes travel the entire height of the woman in front of her; from the white sandals on her feet, to her tan, smooth legs, all the way up to the giant grin that she dons on her face.

She's Waverly, and she's beautiful.

“Is it too much?” Waverly asks. She seems suddenly self conscious as she looks down at her outfit.

“No, no!” Nicole replies quickly. “You look...hot,” she slips. “I mean, you , uh, you look great, Waves.” 

“So you don’t think I look hot?” Waverly teases.

Nicole feels her cheeks becoming flush as she stutters again, trying to back track and dig herself out of whatever hole she’s headed down.

“I’m only kidding,” Waverly says with a laugh, pressing her hand against the redheads stomach. “So are you ready to go or...?”

“Oh, yeah, um, let me just make sure I have my room

key,” she says, turning back toward her room. “Come on in,” she offers.

Waverly steps into her room as she hurries around, searching for her key. She lifts up a few things before she finds it sitting next to her computer at the table. She waves it in the air to show the brunette before tucking it safely into her pocket.

“Ready?” she asks.

“Almost,” Waverly says, moving toward her. She pushes up on her toes to press a soft kiss against her lips. “Now I am,” she smiles.

Nicole smiles back at her and gestures for her to take the lead as they leave her hotel room. They make their way outside where the Uber that Nicole called for is already pulling up in front of the hotel. She opens the car door for Waverly gesturing for her to slide in first. The brunette smiles back and her and thanks her for the gesture.

As the car drives them to their destination, the pair sit close together in the back seat. It’s nice to be going somewhere where she knows Rosita won’t be around watching her every move. She doesn’t have to stop herself from holding Waverly’s hand or put space between them to make it less obvious.

They pull up to the side of the road and the car comes to a stop. They climb out and thank the driver as Nicole leads Waverly down the road.

“Man, Haught, I didn’t think you’d pick the biggest tourist attraction in Ocean City,” the brunette teases.

Nicole immediately questions whether or not she could have chosen something other that the boardwalk for their date. She figured there was a lot to see and do there and more of a chance of just being a small part of a big crowd, allowing them to become lost in their own world.

“I’m kidding,” Waverly whispers as she squeezes her arm with her hand.

Nicole figures she can feel the tension building inside of her. She gives her a soft smile and shrugs.

“We can go somewhere else if you prefer,” she suggests.

“Nicole,” the brunette says, hazel eyes looking up at her as they walk. “It’s perfect.”

Nicole lets out a silent sigh of relief as she continues to lead the brunette down the boardwalk. She gestures to the only place she had actually planned to stop at.

“I hear this is the best ice cream in Maryland,” Nicole informs her.

“Did you really hear that?”

“No, but I guess it’s the best on the boardwalk,” she says as she shrugs her shoulders and laughs. “We already went to dinner, so I figured I’d take you out for dessert, hope that’s cool.”

She’s not sure why she can’t fully push the nerves aside and just be herself with Waverly. She’s worried she’s about to royalty screw something up and change everything for the worse.

“Sounds amazing,” the brunette says with a smile that eases her tension a little. She brushes her fingers against Nicole’s hand until they’re intertwined together. “Is this alright?” Waverly asks.

Nicole nods. She really doesn’t care if anyone sees her in this moment. Sure, she probably should, but without Rosita breathing down her neck she feels a lot freer. The only thing she cares about right now is being out with Waverly.

“What can I get you?” The person behind the counter asks as they approach them.

Nicole looks at Waverly, who is looking up at the menu. She can see the gears turning in her brain as she reads the words, as if she’s going to choose something other than vanilla and chocolate twist with rainbow sprinkles.

Waverly orders just that and Nicole smiles to herself at how well she knows the other woman. Waverly gives her a playful look like she can read her mind and gives her a warning about teasing her. Nicole laughs and looks at the person behind the counter.

“Make that two,” she says as she reaches for her wallet.

She’s surprised when the brunette doesn’t protest her paying, but she enjoys the fact that she doesn’t have to argue with her. She pays and they take their cones and head back under the stars.

The sky is mostly clear, but she does catch a glimpse of some threatening clouds through the darkness. She hopes they hold off at least until they’re done with their date.

They continue to walk with no real destination in mind, chatting idly. The conversation is comfortable and Nicole’s nerves begin to relax more as time goes on.

“So when do I get to read the new book?” the brunette asks.

Nicole laughs. She licks her ice cream agains before answering.

“When I actually have something worth reading.”

“How many times do I have to tell you that everything you write is worth reading,” the brunette says, licking the side of her cone before the liquefying ice cream drips too far down the side.

“Hardly,” Nicole says with a laugh.

She recalls some terrible attempts at writing from her past.

“To me it is,” Waverly says softly.

The redhead feels her chest tighten like her heart is swelling in response.

“You can’t honestly tell me that you’ve enjoyed everything I’ve ever written.”

“Try me,” Waverly says. She plops down on an empty, nearby bench.

Nicole stops and stands next to her, resting her foot on top of the bench. She tilts her head toward the sky, thinking hard about what she feels is her worst writing to date.

“What about the time I wrote about for the school newspaper and they gave me the hard hitting topic of cafeteria food?” she challenges.

“Well, that subject wasn’t your choice, but it was well written,” Waverly says, pointing a finger in her direction.

“You’re just saying that because we’ve been best friends forever,” the redhead tells her.

“No,” the brunette says matter of factory. “I’m saying it because you’re a great writer and you always have been.”

“Okay, what about the time I thought I was going to write science fiction novels and went through that weird zombie phase?”

“Oh man,” Waverly laughs. “Thank you for letting me relive that awkward time in our lives.”

Her laughter grows.

“At least you dressed up with me for Halloween that year,” Nicole reminds her, unable to stop her own laughter at the thought.

“I couldn’t let you be the only zombie when all the other girls were dressed up in anything but clothes,” the brunette reminds her.

“You always had my back,” Nicole says with a smile as she sits down next to her, draping her arm over the back of the bench and resting it on Waverly’s shoulder.

“And I still do,” she smiles. “Here, look...”

She hands her ice cream cone to Nicole to hold as she reaches into her purse and pulls out a folded up piece of paper.

Nicole gives her a confused look as she unfolds the paper and hands it over to her. Nicole hands her back the cone and looks at the paper. It’s tattered and warn, like it’s been read several times and she’s had it for years.

“What is this?” she asks as she brings it closer to her.

When she realizes what it is, her eyes widen and she looks back at the brunette.

“Wait, you still have this?”

Waverly nods. “It’s the first story you ever wrote me,” she says. “I thought maybe I could use it to brag about how I knew you back when you first wanted to be a writer. You know, when you became published and everyone loves you.”

Nicole rolls her eyes at the thought, she’s definitely not _that_ well known. But she can’t stop smiling as she read the words on the paper. The story is ridiculous. It’s only the length of the paper, and her handwriting is terrible.

It’s a story about her friendship with Waverly and basically how much she loved having her as her best friend. She wonders why it took her this long to realize there might have been more than just friendly feelings for the brunette this whole time.

“This is crazy,” she says with a laugh as she finishes reading.

“I love it,” Waverly tells her. “I got to be the hero of the story,” she brags.

“You’ve always been the hero.”

The words fall from her mouth without warning. She feels like her walls are completely dropping and she doesn’t even mind. Waverly smiles and leans in, quickly pressing a kiss against her lips.

“Well, you’ve always been mine,” the brunette says in return.

Nicole let’s the words sink in for a moment. It’s like the time in Texas where she was told that she had an influence on someone else wanting to write. She’s never thought of herself as someone’s hero before. But if that’s what she is to Waverly, then she is damn proud of that.

They eventually stand from the bench and continue walking. They talk about anything and everything. The night is perfect.

Suddenly Nicole feels a couple of rain drops hit her on the top of her head.

“Shit,” she says, reaching up to touch her hair, feeling that it’s slightly wet.

“It’s just sprinkling,” Waverly says, being hopeful.

Just as the words leave her mouth, the sky seems to open up without warning and the rain comes pouring down. There’s not much time to take cover or find any way to stop from getting soaked. The brunette lets out a laugh that’s almost a giggle and turns to face her.

Her once curls are now wet and matted against the exposed skin of her shoulders. Nicole laughs and tries to push her hair back and catches a glimpse of Waverly’s eyes, squinting up at her. She cups her face with her hands, kissing her fiercely.

The rain continues to beat down on them, but they continue to kiss without a single care in the world. They separate slowly, foreheads pressed together, eyes squint open as much as they can.

They laugh.

Nicole looks up at the sky. The clouds that threatened her before clearly didn’t listen and made their way directly above them, but she doesn’t care.

She presses a few more kisses against the brunette’s lips before she suggests they head back to the hotel to find some place dry. Waverly agrees and they duck under an awning to save her phone from becoming any more wet while they call for an Uber to pick them up.

📖

When they returned to the hotel, the rain hadn’t left any bit of their clothes dry. It was an uncomfortable walk back into the building, feeling like she’s sticking to every inch of the fabric on her body. She places more space between her and the brunette when they’re finally back where they feel like eyes could be on them.

In the elevator, they steal a few kisses, but separate just before they reach their floor and the door opens. Nicole doesn’t want the night to end but knows she has an early flight in the morning.

The responsible side of her should tell the brunette ‘goodnight’ and let her know she’ll see her in the morning. That side of her would probably go to bed in her own room and spend the rest of her time until she falls asleep texting Waverly, wishing she was next to her.

The other side of her wants to suggest continuing to hang out. She’s unsure if Waverly would go for it, but when she glances in her direction, she sees the woman wrapping her arms around herself, shivering. She wishes should could over her a sweatshirt or something to keep her warm, but everything she has with her is also wet and freezing.

As they make their way down the hall toward their rooms, a thought pops into her head.

“Hot tub?” she asks, giving the brunette a dimpled grin.

Waverly looks back at her confused at first, but then quickly accepts her offer.

“Thought it would warm you up,” Nicole says with a shrug.

“I’m so there,” the brunette sighs.

With a plan made to change and meet back in the hallway, Nicole makes her way into her room. She digs through her suitcase to find her bathing suit and puts it on as quickly as she can. She’s unsure of how long it’ll take Waverly to change, but doesn’t want to leave her waiting.

She slides a hoodie over her head as she grabs her room key and makes her way to her door. When she reaches the hallway, she sees a familiar woman walking toward her.

“Rosita?”

She’s unsure of why she’s even out there right now.

“I was getting a drink,” Rosita tells her, waving a bottle of water in the air. “Where are you going?” she asks.

“Hot tub,” Nicole answers quickly. “Don’t worry, I’m bringing a chaperone,” she adds with a wink.

Just then, Waverly’s door opens and joins the pair. Rosita eyes the pair more sternly.

“Keep her in line,” she tells Waverly.

“Will do!” Waverly says in a tone so sweet it could give someone a toothache. 

Nicole lets out a laugh that she was trying to hold back. Rosita shakes her head at the pair. Honestly, Nicole is a little shocked that she didn’t try to give her some other warning about being alone with Waverly in a hot tub.

She hasn’t really been on her case as much about Waverly, not since the brunette told her to lay off at the airport in New Orleans at least.

Maybe she finally decided to fully drop the subject or is realizing that maybe she should just stay out of Nicole’s personal life. She’s sure that sounds too good to be true, but she’s not going to give up an opportunity to spend time alone with Waverly in a hot tub because of her overbearing publicist.

“Early morning tomorrow,” the woman reminds them as they part ways.

“We know, thanks, mom,” Nicole teases, not turning around to see her reaction.

“Has she always been so uptight? I feel like it’s only been getting worse,” Waverly groans.

“She’s stressed. In the past I’ve actually been able to write fairly easily, so I think it was a little easier being my publicist when there’s something to promote.”

“Well, you’re productive now,” Waverly reminds her.

“Yeah, but I’m not sure that she trusts that.”

Waverly places a supportive hand on her shoulder as they reach the elevator and head down to the hot tub. The heat slaps her skin as they enter the room, inviting steam rising from the hot tub in the corner.

Nicole pauses as Waverly drops the robe that she had covering up her bathing suit. She suddenly feels like her mouth is full of cotton and her throat is dry. The brunette catches her staring at her bare abs between the two sections of her bathing suit. She gives her a quick wink and dips her body into the hot tub.

Nicole laughs and removes her hoodie, dropping it on a nearby chair so she can join the brunette in the water. The heat of the water stings her cold skin, but it doesn’t take long for her to adjust to it.

Before taking a seat on me side of the hot tub, Nicole leans in and kisses the brunette softly on the lips. When they pull apart, she sinks into the water, leaning back so it’s up to her shoulders. She feels Waverly’s legs brush hers as they move through the water.

“Did you ever think, in all these years, we’d be kissing in a hot tub in Maryland?” the redhead asks.

Waverly pauses.

“No pressure, I’ve just been thinking a lot about it lately,” Nicole admits.

Waverly smiles softly and reaches out for Nicole’s hand. The redhead stretches her arm out, resting it on the edge of the hot tub as her fingers intertwine with the brunette’s.

“I’ve always loved you Nicole. You’re my best friend. She finally says. And there’s always been a part of me that imagined more.”

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?”

“You were always kind of doing your own thing, seeing different girls on and off,” Waverly explains. “Then you met Shae. And you were head over heels. And you guys had your adventures and you loved it and I wasn’t going to ever stand in the way of you and what you wanted.”

“But you didn’t think she was right for me?”

“I didn’t think she was bad to you, I just thought someday maybe you’d figure it out. But I had to let you do that on your own. I wasn’t going to place ideas of what I wanted in your head in case it wasn’t truly what you wanted.”

“And then I kissed you,” Nicole says, reminiscing.

“And then you kissed me.”

“I wish I had done it sooner.”

“How much do you think that would have changed things though?” Waverly challenges.

Nicole thinks for a moment. “I’m not sure that I would have gotten married,” she admits.

“Do you really regret that?” she asks. “I think everything happens for a reason. I think the choices we make lead us to where we are right now and maybe if that had happened earlier in life, we wouldn’t be sitting here, in this hot tub, on your book tour because you’re freakin famous-”

“I am not famous,” the redhead huffs, pushing the idea off right away.

“Oh, okay,” Waverly says sarcastically. “Keep telling yourself that.” She makes an “ok” symbol with her hand. 

“It’s weird,” Nicole admits. 

“Which part?”

“The part where people I never knew existed know that I exist and actually want to read what I write,” Nicole explains.

“Those are the lucky people.”

“Really? I thought I was the lucky one,” she says, a dimpled smirk appearing on her face. 

She slides forward, body gliding smoothly through the hot water. Her thighs gently brush against Waverly’s as she gets closer to her body. She grasps at the edge of the hot tub behind the brunette’s shoulders, pulling herself in further as the gap between them begins to close. The last thing she sees before she closes her eyes is the smile that appears on Waverly’s lips before she kisses her. 

The kiss is soft and sweet. It’s familiar, like she was always meant to be kissing her, yet it yields a newness that sparks a fire within her leaving her wanting more.

She pulls back slowly, not leaving much space between the pair as she sucks in a breath of air into her lungs. She pauses for a moment before she opens her eyes, catching another glimpse of Waverly’s beautiful smile. 

She eventually plops back down into the seat behind her, smiling back at the woman in front of her. She finds herself staring at her face for longer than she probably ever has before. Her eyes trace the lines that formed next to her eyes when she smiles, down her sculpted jawline and across her soft lips that she never wants to stop kissing. 

The sound of the door opening behind her breaks her stare as she instinctively turns to see who is entering the room. Her eyes widen at the sight that she didn’t expect to see. 

“Rosita?” she asks as if she doesn’t actually know who it is. “I thought we had an early morning tomorrow,” she teases.

“We do,” Rosita agrees. “But the more I thought about it, the more joining you guys for a soak in a hot tub sounded appealing.”

“It wasn’t really an invite,” Nicole huffs, partially under her breath.

“It’s for hotel guests, Haught, and that’s what I am,” she says with a wink.

Nicole can’t argue with her there. She’s just thoroughly disappointed that she’s ruining the mood and her moment alone with Waverly. With their busy schedule and Rosita always checking in on her, she’s not sure how many more moments alone she’ll have with the brunette. She sure as hell knows that Rosita would never go for it if she found out that they’ve been making out in their free time. 

“I guess I can’t stop you then,” Nicole says with a laugh, trying to play it cool.

She tries not to think about the fact that Rosita could have seen her kissing Waverly before she realized that the other woman was nearby. She slides over to a different seat in the hot tub, allowing Rosita to join them.

“It’s really relaxing,” Waverly tells her.

“Just what I need,” she says with a smirk in Waverly’s direction. 

Nicole isn’t sure what to make of it as she watches Rosita drop the towel that she had wrapped around her body to reveal the bikini that she’s wearing underneath. Her eyes widen a bit at the sight. In all the years that she’s known Rosita, she never thought she’d see the day where she would be standing in front of her, clad only in a bathing suit, leaving little left to the imagination. 

She watches as Rosita continues to smile at Waverly. A fire burns within Nicole’s gut, making her want to scream. She keeps her cool as much as possible as Rosita slowly steps down into the hot water, sinking her body slowly underneath until it is submerged up to her shoulders. 

“Mmm,” she says, taking in a deep breath and closing her eyes. She lets the breath out slowly before she speaks.

“This is nice.”

She leans back against the side of the hot tub. Stretching her arms out, she rests them on the edge of the hot tub. 

“Told you,” Waverly says.

Her tone is sweet, much sweeter than Nicole feels on the inside.

Nicole’s eyes narrow in on Rosita’s hand that is far too close to Waverly’s arm for her to be happy about it. 

“You okay, Nicole?” Rosita asks. 

Nicole blinks a couple of times at the sound of her name. She finally focuses on where it’s coming from and turns her attention toward the woman’s face.

“Yeah, sorry,” she says. “Lost in my thoughts, I guess.”

She feels Waverly’s eyes on her and briefly glances in her direction. The brunette gives her a look and Nicole smiles back at her in response. Waverly’s eyes tell her that she knows something is up, but she doesn’t question any further. 

“So, Waverly,” Rosita says. “How excited are you for the next book?

Waverly smiles. “I’m always excited to read something that Nicole writes.”

“Have you read any of it yet?”

“Not yet, this one is pretty secretive until she feels its ready,” the brunette teases, pushing Nicole gently on the arm. 

Nicole laughs. “I’m sitting right here, Rosita, you don't have to talk about me like I’m not.”

“You okay?” Waverly asks in a hushed tone. 

Nicole nods. The truth is, she’s uncomfortable with the way that her publicist is looking at the woman she cares about. She also doesn’t want to have to sneak around, but that’s all that have right now. And she knows that Rosita is just trying to get her to admit to what’s going on without saying it directly to her.

“I’m fine,” she lies. “Rosita, I’ll let you read it when it’s done,” she reminds her. 

“I’m just happy you’re writing,” Rosita tells her.

Her tone is genuine and she smiles softly at the redhead. 

That’s the part of Rosita that Nicole likes; the soft, kind Rosita, not the one hounding her because she hasn’t written a word in months. 

“Maybe we’ll all get to go on tour again if this next book takes off like the second one did,” Rosita adds with a wink in Waverly’s direction. 

“I couldn’t do this without either of you, so I hope so,” Nicole says, trying to bring Rosita’s attention back to her, ignoring the fact that the woman is clearly trying to flirt with _her_ girl.

“It’s definitely been a great time,” Waverly says with a smile. 

“What’s been your favorite part so far?” Rosita asks.

Nicole looks back and forth between the other two women as they have a conversation amongst themselves. She feels like she may be overreacting, but she’s extremely annoyed at the intense eye contact and Rosita’s hand lingering closely to Waverly’s shoulder.

She expects Waverly to slide over, moving closer to her instead of Rosita but she doesn’t. She knows there is a charade to keep up, but it doesn’t stop the jealousy from nearly bubbling over the edge and pouring out all over the place. 

“I think I’m going to head back to my room,” she finally says, gaining the attention of the others. 

Waverly looks disappointed.

“I’m pretty much fully pruned and it’s getting pretty late,” she adds.

She pushes herself up with her hands on the edge of the hot tub and emerges from the hot water, cool air immediately hitting her skin.

“Wait, Nicole,” Waverly begins.

“It’s fine,” she says, looking back at the pair. “You two can carry on,” she assures them. “I’m just going to go to bed.”

“I can walk you,” the brunette suggests.

“I dont want to disturb your conversation, it’s really okay,” she lies.

“Are you mad?” Waverly asks.

“No, I’ll just see you guys tomorrow. I really should go get some writing done,” she lies again.

“I love to see it!” Rosita says with excitement.

“I also love to see it, but don’t be silly, I’m your chaperone afterall,” Waverly says with a smirk and a wink. 

Nicole feels her heart speed up in her chest. She notices a bit a disappointment on Rosita’s face. Maybe she was actually flirting with Waverly because she is interested in her, not just to get under Nicole’s skin. Maybe she was just killing two birds with one stone here. 

As Waverly climbs out of the hot tub, Rosita’s eyes trail down her slender body, focusing on her ass for a moment before she lifts her eyes and makes contact with Nicole. She shrugs her shoulders at the redhead and Nicole tries not to give her too dirty of a look. 

Waverly grabs a towel and wraps it around her body to dry off.

“You coming too?” she asks Rosita as she turns back to the woman.

“I think I’ll stay for a bit,” she replies. “It’s actually pretty nice to relax.”

“You deserve it,” Waverly tells her. “I’ll get her back safely.”

“Thanks, Waverly,” Rosita says, smiling back at her.

“Goodnight, Rosita,” Nicole says through her teeth.

“Night, Haught!”

Nicole pushes the door open as fast as she can, wanting anything but to be in there any longer. Waverly trails slightly behind her, but she knows she’s there.

“Well, she has great timing,” she hears Waverly’s voice come from behind her.

“She’s just messing with me,” Nicole huffs as she reaches for the button the elevator. “She’s still onto us and she wants to shove it in my face. She’s never followed us anywhere and suddenly she joins us in a hot tub and blatantly flirts with you in front of me?”

“Nicole, maybe she wasn’t doing it on purpose,” Waverly says like she’s trying to reason with her.

The pair enter the elevator and Nicole pushes the button to their floor.

“She was hitting on you!” she argues. “I didn’t even think that woman owned a bikini. It’s not the only time she’s flirted with you on this trip, Waves.”

“Yeah, that much I can’t deny,” she replies with a small laugh.

Nicole gives her a warning look.

“I didn’t flirt back with her! Either time!”

“You didn’t push her away,” the redhead huffs. She knows she’s acting a little childish, but she’s mad.

The elevator comes to a stop and the exit together, heading down the hallway toward their rooms.

“What did you want me to do? Jump into your lap and tell her I’m not interested back I’d rather be spending my time with you?” Waverly huffs.

Nicole can’t help but smile at the other woman.

“I mean, it sounds good coming out of your mouth,” she teases.

“And how well would that go over?” the brunette challenges as she follows Nicole down the hall, pausing while the redhead pulls out her key and opens her hotel room door.

“Probably not well,” Nicole admits as she pushes the door open and enters the room.

She turns toward the brunette as the door closes behind them.

“Thank you for remaining calmer than I’ll ever be.”

With a soft smile on her face, she reaches out for the brunette to come toward her. The woman smiles and moves toward her.

“You were getting pretty worked up,” she says. She lifts her hands to Nicole’s shoulders, rubbing Nicole’s tense muscles.

“That feels nice,” she says, closing her eyes.

“You know nothing is ever going to happen with me and Rosita, right?” Waverly assures her.

Nicole nods, eyes still closed. As much as she knows that it’ll never happen, it still irritates her to see Rosita flirt with her. As the days of the tour continue on, she feels it becoming harder and harder to stick with the “plan.” What’s so bad about being honest with people? She wishes she could just come clean now, but on the other hand, she feels like she’s too far into the lie to take it back. 

“Everything’s gonna be okay,” Waverly says, kissing her on the cheek. “I know it’s not ideal, but we'll get through the rest of the tour and when we’re home, things can be different, right?” 

“Right. I just have to finally my divorce and move out of my ex wife’s house… man, I’m a mess. You sure you want this?”

She can’t help but laugh.

“I want all of it,” Waverly tells her. “I want all of you. It’s always been you, Nicole.” 

Nicole’s heart skips a beat at the sight of Waverly this happy. She quickly captures the brunette’s lips with her own like she doesn’t want to waste another moment not kissing her. She feels like she has a lot of ground to make up for the years she spent blind and oblivious to what was right in front of her.

“Me too,” she whispers in between kisses.

It seems that that is all Waverly needed to hear.

Nicole’s mind becomes a blur as she finds herself almost tripping over her own feel as she’s led to the wall behind her. The brunette’s body presses against her, clothes still wet from the hot tub, goosebump covered skin from the cool air in the room.

She’s not sure what will happen from here, or even when they go home after the tour. But if this is a glimpse of what life could be like, she’s ready for it.

📖

They are almost to the last week of the tour and Nicole can’t even believe how fast it’s gone by. She’s been writing a lot more and Rosita has been on her nerves a lot less. She hasn’t had a lot of alone time with Waverly, but the time they do spend together is worth it. 

It’s the last night in New York and Nicole finally feels like she’s made enough progress on at least outlining the story for Waverly to read some of it. The more she wrote, the more she noticed the brunette trying to read it over her shoulder. She usually turns the computer screen and tells her she has to be patient, but deep down she loves the enthusiasm that Waverly has for her writing.

The brunette squeals with excitement when she tells her that she can read some of the book so far. She doesn’t waste time, as she immediately pushes Nicole out of the way and sits down at her computer.

Her eyes start moving from left to right across the page and Nicole suddenly feels nervous. She starts to pace the room next to the brunette, barely realizing she’s doing it. her eyes are still locked on Waverly.

“Are you going to stare at me the entire time?” Waverly asks as she looks up from the laptop. “Sit down,” she says with a laugh.

Nicole sighs and stops pacing the room, plopping down on the end of the bed. She can’t stop watching as Waverly continues to read. She catches her facial expressions as she reads, mostly consisting of smiles, which makes Nicole feel a little better about watching someone else read something that she wrote.

It’s not the only time they’ve been in this position. Waverly reads her work whenever she writes anything. But things are different now. Things are much different.

After another twenty minutes in silence, which feels more like hours to Nicole, Waverly finally looks up from the computer, standing up from the table.

“Nicole,” she says with a smile. Nicole stares back at her, waiting for more to come. The seconds she has to wait are agonizing. “This is amazing!”

She gestures toward the computer. The smile on the brunette’s face grows bigger than before.

“Yeah?” Nicole asks as if she doesn’t believe the words coming out of Waverly’s mouth. 

“Yes! The twist is so good!” Waverly is still beaming. “A love triangle that I never expected.”

She steps back from the table and moves across the room toward the redhead. 

“I went back to the beginning, like you said,” Nicole says.

Waverly gives her a confused look at first before she continues speaking.

“I thought about what inspired me in the first place,” she continues to explain. “I needed to really think about the characters and what felt most natural,” she says. “On the one hand, she has the instant connection, the new relationship, it’s fun and exciting, but they don’t really know each other yet. Then there’s the best friend.”

Nicole reaches her hands up, placing them on Waverly’s hips, pulling her a little closer. She parts her legs, allowing the brunette to settle between them. She tilts her head up to make eye contact with her. 

“I think in the beginning I thought what inspired me was the newness of my relationship with Shae. It was exciting, we didn’t know anything about each other and somehow that worked for a while,” she explains. “But when I stopped to really think about it,” she continues. “When I went back to the beginning, that’s not where it came from.”

“No?” Waverly asks. 

“No,” she says. “It’s you, Waverly. You’ve been the consistency in my life. You’ve been my rock. You’ve always been the one I go to for things. You were the first person I told about writing,” she continues. “You’re my inspiration.”

Waverly doesn’t waste any time before she’s leaning down toward the redhead, kissing her. Nicole feels the weight of the brunette’s body, settling on her lap, straddling her legs. The kiss deepens quickly, Nicole feels Waverly’s tongue brush against her own. She slides her hands up into the brunette’s hair behind her head. She feels Waverly moan softly into her mouth, driving her even more crazy. 

Bunching up the material on the bottom of Waverly’s shirt, she pushes up with her hands, sliding it over the brunette’s head. She discards the garment, tossing it to the floor. A giggle bubbles out of Waverly’s mouth as she leans back down to reconnect their lips. Nicole trails her hands from Waverly’s hips, up the smooth skin of her sides, thumbs ghosting her breasts. 

She hears the brunette take a sharp breath in, leaning her head back slightly, allowing Nicole access to press wet kisses down her neck. Waverly’s hands begin to frantically pull at Nicole’s shirt, lifting it as much as she can before she needs Nicole to help. Nicole separates her lips from Waverly’s neck to lift her own shirt further over her head, tossing it to the side. 

Waverly immediately reaches behind Nicole’s body, unclasping her bra in one swift movement. Nicole is impressed. She knows that Waverly has only slept with a woman, one other time, but she’s proving to definitely know what she’s doing. 

Nicole quickly unclasps Waverly’s bra as well, dying to feel her body against her own. She feels electricity coursing through her veins as the brunette presses her body against Nicole’s. Waverly’s hand quickly slides between their bodies, palm stopping to press against Nicole’s breast. She feels her nipple hardening under her touch, a small moan escaping from her throat. 

She tilts her head back slightly and Waverly takes the opportunity to press a single kiss on the edge of Nicole’s jaw before leaving a trail of hot, wet kisses down her neck. Nicole feels Waverly’s tongue flick against her skin as she trails further down her neck, teeth scraping lightly. She bites down gently once she reaches Nicole’s collarbone, sending a shiver down her spine. Nicole wonders if it’s going to leave a mark, but in the moment, she doesn’t care. 

The more the brunette kisses her, hands exploring her body, the harder it is for Nicole to hold back taking more control. She stands from her spot on the bed, lifting Waverly gently as she stands. Nicole starts to unbutton Waverly’s pants as she reconnects their lips, continuing to kiss her. She struggles for a moment before Waverly reaches down to help remove her own pants. 

Nicole turns them around, leading Waverly to the bed behind her. She watches intently as the brunette takes a seat on the edge of the bed, laying backwards onto her back. The redhead pauses, taking in the sight of Waverly laying, practically naked in front of her.

She’s so beautiful.

Waverly scoots herself back on the bed, propping herself up on her elbows. She gestures with one finger for the redhead to join her on the bed. Nicole grins back at her, climbing up onto the bed, laying on her side next to the brunette. She props herself up on her left elbow, trailing her fingers of her right hand gently down Waverly’s chest to her abs. 

“You okay?” she asks, catching Waverly’s gaze.

She gently brushes Waverly’s cheek with her thumb.

Waverly turns her head slightly, softly kissing Nicole’s thumb.

“Perfect,” she says with a smile.

Nicole can’t help but smile back at her, kissing her softly on the lips, before trailing a line of kisses down her neck. Waverly lets out a soft moan when Nicole bites down softly on her neck, soothing it quickly with her tongue

The sounds the brunette makes ignites a flame in Nicole as she lifts herself further off the bed, hovering over Waverly’s body. She takes another glance at her face, reading her reaction before laying soft kisses down her body. 

Waverly’s skin is warm and soft under her lips. She takes her time reading every movement, every sound, completely indulging herself with every ounce of the brunette. She chooses her movements carefully based on the reactions she receives from the woman underneath her.

When she hears the brunette almost begging for more, she makes her way further south where she wants it most. She finds herself focusing on where Waverly wants to be touched the most.

She finds herself completely enamored by Waverly in this moment. She memorizes every mark, every curve, every perfect imperfection of the woman’s body. She commits every word, every sound, every breath to memory as she feels the brunette coming undone underneath her.

When she knows she’s close, she focuses on steady movements. She doesn’t want to stop until she’s forced to by the brunette reaching down to steady her, giving her an out of breath warning that she’s too sensitive for her to keep touching her even though Nicole clearly wants to.

She takes the hint and kisses her way back up the brunette’s body until she’s laying next to her again. Waverly rolls toward her, pressing a hard kiss against her lips.

Nicole watches as Waverly chest rises and falls. Her eyes are closed and her breath begins to steady. The redhead trails her fingers across the brunette’s soft skin, with no particular destination. She watches goosebumps form across the woman’s smooth stomach

“That was,” Waverly says, catching her breath. She presses another kiss against Nicole’s mouth. “Wow,” she says as she pulls away.

Nicole laughs a little. She’s feeling pretty proud of herself, but also complete in awe of the woman lying next to her. She wishes they could stay like this, not having to worry about everything that waits for them outside of the hotel room. 

“You’re beautiful,” Nicole says, almost in a whisper.

Waverly’s smile grows bigger and she rolls into Nicole further, laying soft kisses on her face. 

“Yes,” Waverly says. “You are,” she grins back at her. Nicole laughs and shakes her head at the brunette. 

She feels Waverly’s hand slide down her body, cupping her between her legs, over her pants. Nicole lets out an audible moan, louder than intended. She feels Waverly start to fumble with the button of her jeans, popping them open after a moment. She tugs at them, looking at Nicole, silently asking for help. 

📖

Nicole wakes up the next morning to the sun shining through the hotel room window. She slowly opens her eyes and finds herself immediately smiling at the sight of Waverly sleeping next to her. Her bare shoulders peek out from the blanket, light beaming in on her sun-kissed skin.

The redhead leans over, wrapping one arm across the brunette’s lower back and places soft kisses across her shoulders. The woman shifts in her sleep, turning toward her and slowly squinting her eyes open.

“Good morning,” she says, her voice low and a bit raspy.

“Morning,” Nicole smiles and kisses her cheek. “How did you sleep?”

“Way better than I do alone,” the brunette says with a grin.

“Yeah, I could get used to this,” Nicole admits, tracing mindless shapes onto the skin of Waverly’s shoulder.

Waverly glances at the clock next to the bed. She groans and tells Nicole she doesn’t want to get up. Nicole tries to protest, holding her by the waist so she can leave.

“I’m not sure how well it would go over if Rosita came looking for you and I was naked in your bed,” Waverly reminds her.

Nicole laughs. “I guess that would save me having to explain that there’s something going on between us,” she jokes.

Waverly playfully pushes her arm.

“That’s going to be a fun conversation to have.”

“I know,” Nicole internally groans at the thought of it. “I promise it’ll happen though,” she assures her. “I won’t keep you my dirty little secret forever,” she adds with a wink.

Waverly scoffs at her, trying to act offended.

“I better go, I have to shower anyway.”

Nicole pouts for a moment, but then agrees and tells her she’ll see her soon. They share a few more kisses before Waverly throws her clothes back on and makes her way out the door.

Nicole figures she should probably find some clothes also so she’s not naked when Rosita shows up as well. She grabs a pair of sweatpants and a sports bra, sliding them over her body. With a little more digging, she finds a tank top to put on of her bra.

Taking a look around the room, she figures she should probably do a quick clean up and sit back down at the computer to get some work done. She might have let her time with Waverly become more of a distraction when she could have been writing, but she doesn’t mind it one bit.

About thirty minutes goes by and she’s well into a paragraph when there’s a knock at her door. She types out the rest of her thought and calls out that she’ll be right there.

As she thought, it’s Rosita and luckily she brought coffee.

“You’re a saint,” the redhead says as she takes the warm cup from the other woman’s hands.

“I know,” Rosita says with a wink.

“Don’t wink at me,” the redhead says with a laugh. “Sorry, you caught me in the middle of writing,” she adds.

“That’s what I like to hear!” Rosita says cheerfully. “How’s it going?”

Nicole turns her head to look toward her computer. “Great actually,” she tells her.

When she turns back toward her publicist, her demeanor appears to have changed. Nicole gives her a confused look.

“What’s that?” Rosita asks, pointing toward her neck.

“What?” she asks, still confused.

She makes her way over to the mirror in her room and her eyes get big at the sight of a clear hickey on her collarbone.

“Tell me that’s a curling iron accident,” Rosita groans, punching the bridge of her nose.

Nicole knows that Rosita knows very well that’s not what it is.

“We’ve talked about this, Nicole,” she reminds her.

Nicole feels frustration boiling inside of her. They’ve talked about it, but it doesn’t stop the way she feels. It doesn’t stop the fact that she doesn’t want to play pretend anymore. It doesn’t stop the fact that she wants to be with Waverly and her and Shae have moved on from their relationship.

“I get that,” Nicole says. “But I can’t do the lying anymore,” she admits. “The tour is almost over, then what? I have to keep pretending to be married. You didn’t want me to take way from promoting the book,” she reminds her. “We only have about a week left.”

“How do you think it’s going to look if people suspect you are sleeping with your handler?” Rosita retorts.

Nicole takes a deep, frustrated breath in through her nose. She rubs the back of her neck with her hand before letting the breath out.

“She’s not just my handler, Rosita,” Nicole reminds her. 

“I know that,” Rosita tells her. “But we do a decent job here of keeping most people out of your personal life.”

“Apparently except my non-existent marriage!” Nicole argues. “I’m not playing games anymore.”

“I’m not trying to play games, Nicole,” Rosita argues. “I’m just trying to protect your career and right now isn’t time for this type of announcement.”

“What announcement, Rosita?” Nicole asks. 

“That you’re getting a divorce and you suddenly have a new girlfriend,” Rosita says. “That’s not going to look good. You go on tour, without your wife, and come out dating the girl you took with you?”

“I don’t need to announce anything, Rosita,” Nicole explains. “And none of this is sudden, Shae and I have been over for a while,” she adds “I’m just not willing to continue with the charade anymore. I should get some say here.”

“When the tour is over, we can discuss it again,” Rosita says. “Look, you’re in the process of finally writing the third book here. You don’t want people more interested in who you’re doing than what you’re writing?”

Nicole groans. She feels like fire is about to come out of her ears if this conversation doesn’t come to an end soon. She’s pretty sure no one would even bat an eye at her personal life. She’s an author, not some famous actor.

“She’s your small town best friend. I get that you love her, but is it fair to put her through this?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Nicole asks, narrowing her eyes at her publicist.

“Why put her in the spotlight?” Rosita asks. “Life can be complicated when you have tours and deadlines, not everyone is willing to go through that.”

“You think she’s going to bail on me because I write things that people like?” Nicole asks. “She’s one of the few people that hasn’t ever changed on me, why would she start now?”

“I guess it’s up to you whether or not you’re willing to put her through that and find out,” Rosita says.

Nicole doesn't know what to say. She wants to scream. It takes a lot out of her to remain calm in this moment, but somehow she does it.

“Fine,” she says.

It’s not what she wants to say, but she feels that in this moment, it’s all she can say to get Rosita off her case.

“It’s for the best, Nicole,” Rosita assures her.

Nicole can’t even look at her. It’s not for the best, none of this is for the best. She’s her best when she’s with Waverly. Waverly is what’s best, she knows that.

But at the same time, there’s a small part of her that just let Rosita’s words into her head and the doubt suddenly floods in faster than she can control.


	4. The North

After asking Rosita, in the calmest voice she can muster up, to leave her room, Nicole slowly makes her way through her room to get ready for their flight. She really doesn't care about being speedy, she really doesn't care much about anything at the moment. She throws things into her suitcase, not really paying attention to where anything is going. She just assumes as long as it's in the bag, she can deal with it later. She doesn't have much left to pack, Waverly reminded her to get herself ready for the morning before they hung out the night before.

She listened.

When she has everything packed and ready to go, she gives her room another once over to make sure she isn't leaving anything behind. She notices the pillow where Waverly slept the night before still has a bit of an imprint from the brunette's head. Her mind flashes briefly to the moments they had spent together that night. She sees Waverly's face as she carefully read the words that Nicole wrote for her new book. She sees the smile on her face when she told her that she's been her inspiration all along. She remembers every kiss, every touch, every butterfly that filled her gut.

Attempting to push the thoughts from her mind, she goes into the bathroom to splash her face with water before she collects her bags again and heads for the door. She exits her room and starts heading down the hallway. She doesn't know where anyone else is, and she doesn't stop to find them.

As she heads down the hall, she sees Waverly's door open and the brunette pops her head out. There's a smile on her face.

"Hey," she says, calling out to Nicole.

Nicole lets the numbness continue to take over and doesn't respond. She makes her way to the elevator, pressing the button for the lobby before anyone else has time to join her. She doesn't have it in her in this moment to talk to anyone. As much as, deep down, she knows talking to Waverly usually helps everything she finds herself wallowing in her pain.

She doesn't want to stop or look back to see Waverly's response. She knows that will only make the pain worse. She makes her way outside of the hotel, finding a bench to sit on. She places her bags on the ground in front of her, staring off into the space in front of her, eyes not focusing on anything in particular.

Eventually, Rosita and Waverly find her outside. Rosita makes some comment about her hiding or trying to leave without them, completely like everything is normal. Nicole gives her a fake smile in response. Rosita tries to talk to her as if nothing just happened when they were upstairs. Waverly's eyes try to catches hers on and off, but she doesn't let them lock for too long.

The brunette looks confused, she looks hurt, and Nicole doesn't want to keep looking at her when she knows that she's the cause of that pain.

The trip through the airport is a blur. It's busy and there are people everywhere, but Nicole feels like she can't actually see or hear anything in particular. All she sees is the pain she's caused to others and the sound of her brain yelling at her for the mistakes that she keeps making.

Nicole follows Rosita and Waverly through the motions of their airport routine; checking their bags, going through security and making their way down to their gate. When they reach the gate, she sits down and immediately puts her earbuds in. She catches the sight of Waverly and Rosita talking, but doesn't know what they're saying. Neither of them try to engage her. She assumes they've gotten the hint.

She tries not to stare, but she sees Waverly starting to use her hands more the more she talks. She knows that can mean one of two things; she's talking about something she's passionate about, or she's lecturing Rosita about something...or it could be both at the same time. She steals a few more glances before either of them notice.

Part of her wants to mute her music or remove an earbud to hear what they're talking about. Maybe Waverly is fighting for her. Maybe she's telling Rosita that it's okay and she understands the consequences of being with Nicole, but she doesn't care. Maybe she's telling her that Nicole can make her out choices, and that her intentions have never been to hurt anyone else.

Deciding to leave it a mystery, she leaves the music playing loudly into her ears. It doesn't fully drown out the negativity in her brain, but it helps better than the silence. She only removes them for a moment as they board the airplane and to be sure she can hear the TSA officer as she hands over her boarding pass at the podium.

Once seated on the plane, the music is quickly turned back on and the rest of the world is temporarily shut out again for the duration of the flight. When the flight lands, they go back through the motions of collecting their bags, calling a car and making their way to the hotel. It's repetitive, but starting to feel like normal life to Nicole.

When they check in to the hotel, they make their way to their rooms to unwind from their flight. Rosita invites herself into Nicole's room to discuss the schedule for the next couple of days while they're in Michigan. It's officially the tail end of the tour, but that doesn't mean the events are about to slow down.

Nicole doesn't mind. She likes staying busy and spending less time alone with her thoughts. As Rosita goes over their schedule, there's a knock at the door. Rosita quickly walks over and opens it, gesturing for Waverly to come in.

"We're just going over the schedule for the next couple of days, I have a copy for you as usual," Rosita says with a laugh. She hands the brunette a piece of paper.

Nicole lays back on one of the bed in the room, staring at the ceiling. She engages in conversation when asked questions, but that's about it.

After a few minutes of all three woman being in the room, Waverly turns to Rosita and asks, “Rosita, can I have a minute alone with Nicole?”

Her tone is stern like she means business. Nicole isn’t really sure where this is about to go, but she continues to lay back on the bed, staring up at the ceiling. She knows that Waverly is stubborn as well and if she has something to say, Nicole isn't going to be able to stop her.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea,” Rosita tries to protest.

Nicole doesn’t have it in her to tell her off again, but she thinks the brunette has it under control.

“Rosita,” Waverly says in a warning tone.

Nicole catches her publicist take a step back at the tone of Waverly’s voice.

“I need you to leave us alone,” the brunette says.

She’s obviously not taking ‘no’ for an answer.

At that, Rosita doesn’t protest. She nods and turns toward the hotel room door, pulling it toward her. When the door clicks shut, Waverly moves over toward the bed where Nicole continues to lay, staring at the ceiling above her.

“Okay, you’re going to tell me, right now, what’s going on,” the brunette huffs.

She stands next to the bed with her hands on her hips.

“Nothing, Waverly,” the redhead lies.

She looks at her for a brief moment before turning back toward the ceiling.

"Nicole,” the brunette warns. “You haven’t really spoken to Rosita or myself all day, which is very unlike you even when you’re tired. And if I did something to warrant that, you can tell me-"

"Rosita saw a hickey on my collarbone," Nicole says quickly, cutting off the brunette as she speaks.

Waverly’s face goes white. "I’m so sorry Nicole," she tells her.

"It's not your fault, Waves," the redhead tells her. "I just, I just don’t know if I can do this any longer," she admits.

"Do what?" Waverly asks, clearly confused.

Nicole doesn't even blame her for being confused. She left her room that morning after spending an amazing night together. They were full of infatuation for each other and here she is, completely shutting her out.

"All of it," Nicole says. "Pretend. Hide. I get it, I’m a writer, I’m on tour to promote my book. Did I leave with the expectation of falling for my best friend on the way? No," she continues. "Is that what happened? Yes."

She sits up on the bed and turns her body so her feet are dangling off the edge and onto the floor. Waverly stands closely to her legs and doesn't try to move back when Nicole sits up.

"I’m a fucking human being," Nicole groans as she drops her head into her hands.

"Nicole-," Waverly says, softly.

She places a comforting hand on her shoulder as if she's trying to calm her down.

"I let her get into my head, Waves," she explains as she looks back toward her. "I knew what she was doing and I let her do it anyway."

She feels like an idiot. Why does she even let it bother her? Who is Rosita to control her emotions?

"What did she say?" Waverly asks.

Nicole explains the conversation. She starts with the discovery of the hickey on her collarbone and ends with the warnings that Rosita gave her. She explains the woman's intensions like she understands where she's coming from, even if she doesn't.

"And maybe she’s right," she finishes.

"That’s the first time I’ve ever heard you say those words in regards to Rosita’s opinion of your personal life," the brunette admits.

Nicole tries to read her face. It's almost as if she's hurt by the conversation, but doesn't want it to show. Waverly has always been good at being a pretty open book with Nicole, so even with her best poker face it's hard for her to hide.

"You hear it enough, you start to believe it," Nicole says, shrugging her shoulders. 

"Rosita isn’t here right now," Waverly reminds her. "So can you do something for me?"

Nicole nods. There's nothing she wouldn't do for her.

"Can you look me in the eye and honestly tell me that you believe I’ll just walk away from you because of your career path?"

Nicole pauses after the question. She thinks about all of the times that Waverly was there for her. She thinks about how she has supported her career before it was a career. She thinks about how Waverly helped her find a publicist in the first place. She even sent the first email. She's not even sure if Rosita knows that to this day.

Waverly sat next to Nicole as she tried to draft an email to contact people to publish her book. When she couldn't come up with the courage to press the send button, her best friend was there to place her hand over top of her's and made her hand press the button.

She was there at her first book signing in their hometown. It was small and not a lot of people showed up, but Waverly was there, cheering her on, always in her corner.

She doesn't speak to answer, but shakes her head instead. She clenches her jaw, trying to fight the tears that threaten to fall from her eyes.

"Then what are you so afraid of?" Waverly asks her.

"That’s a loaded question," Nicole admits. 

"Nicole," the brunette speaks softly, rubbing her cheek gently with her thumb.

Nicole sucks in a deep breath of air through her nose. She closes her eyes and holds it for a moment before she lets it out through her mouth.

"I’m afraid that I’m going to be too much for you," Nicole finally admits. "That the traveling and the promoting and schedules and deadlines will be a lot, because it is. And while you see that from the outside, fully emerging you in something like that could be overwhelming."

"So you think being alone for the rest of your life is easier than letting someone in?" Waverly challenges.

"Don’t you?" She laughs.

"I’ve already let you in," Waverly tells her. "And I think it should be up to me whether or not I think I can handle all of that. I can’t sit here and make promises that I’m not going to be overwhelmed by everything, Nicole. People get overwhelmed by everyday life sometimes," she continues. She reaches both hands up to Nicole's face, cupping her cheeks on both sides. She brings her face closer to the redhead's. "But please hear me when I say that _you_ will never be too much for me."

Nicole pauses to process the words that come from Waverly's mouth. She blinks a few times and focuses on her steady breathing.

"You know me, Nicole," Waverly continues. "I’m not going to stand here in front of you like some scene out of Grey's Anatomy and ask you to pick me, choose me," she quotes. "But you know where I stand and where I’ll continue to stand."

"I just don’t know how to please everyone anymore. The pressure is getting to me and I feel so close to cracking, Waves, that-"

She instinctively presses her forehead against Waverly's, feeling so close but still so far away from her somehow.

"Hey, hey," the brunette says softly rubbing the redhead's back with her hand. “What’s important here is you taking care of yourself and doing what’s best for you," she reminds her.

"I don’t even know what that is right now," Nicole tells her.

"And that’s fine. I’ll keep Rosita off your case. We'll get through the rest of the tour, and everything is going to be okay," the brunette assures her.

She wants to believe that. She wants to believe it so bad that she almost does, but there’s still that glimmer of doubt that’s stopping her from fully feeling in this moment.

"Why are you so understanding?" she asks as Waverly stands up further, giving her a soft smile.

"Because I know you, and I trust you," she admits. "And you don’t do anything that you’re not 100% sure of."

Those words sting. She doesn’t want Waverly to think it’s her that she doubts. She wants to be all in, 100%, no doubts in her mind. There’s nothing she wants more.

The back of her mind continues to nag at her with thoughts of her divorce not being finalized yet, her book not being in good enough shape yet and the fact that when she goes home she still has to figure out where she's going to live. There's a lot that she tried to leave behind when she went on the road for these couple of months and they seem to be creeping back up on her faster than she expected.

"That's the thing, Waverly," she says. "I don't think I've ever actually been 100% sure of anything in my life besides you. And that's the first time I've ever said that out loud," she admits.

She sees a small smile appear on the brunette's lips. It's something that she wasn't sure she'd see again at the beginning of this conversation. She's not sure where things are going to go from here, but she knows that she can't make things any better right now. She knows what she has to focus on. Rosita isn't right about everything, but she does know how to help manager her career.

“I don’t want to end things with you, Waverly,” Nicole tells her.

It’s the truth. She can’t even picture any bit of life without Waverly anymore.

“Then why don’t we pause it,” Waverly suggests.

Nicole gives her a confused look.

“Maybe we were getting a little carried away and not focusing on why we’re here in the first place. We’re almost done with the tour, only a couple stops left, right?”

Nicole nods.

“Let’s get through those and when we have a little more time in our hands we can handle us,” she continues.

Nicole’s heart hurts. She prefers a pause over a complete break of whatever this is between them, but that doesn’t mean it’s exactly what she wants.

“You have a lot to focus on right now,” Waverly tells her. “And I’ve been distracting you.”

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Nicole assures her. “None of this is your fault.”

Waverly nods, but looks back at her like she doesn’t really believe it. They continue to talk for a little while before they decide to go their separate ways for the rest of the night. Nicole wants to stop her as she walks out the door. She wants to pull her into her arms and lay down together. She wants to tell her everything is going to be alright and they’ll get through this together; like they always have.

But she doesn’t. She gives her one last small smile before the brunette leaves and the door clicks closed behind her.

Once she’s alone, the room feels quieter than it has ever been, yet for some reason, louder at the same time. She tries to write, it doesn’t go well. She tries to read what she has already written, but the words burn inside of her, torturing her, reminding her of what’s just barely in her reach but she can’t have; not yet at least.

She knows the brunette only suggested the pause in some attempt to create less stress for Nicole. While she appreciates the gesture, there’s this nagging feeling in the back of her mind that tells her the pause will turn into Waverly changing her mind. There’s a fear that she’s going to decide that it’s easier this way, but Nicole tells herself that she’s going to fight like hell to stop that from happening.

📖

The next few signings go smoothly, despite the internal struggle that Nicole is still going through. She’s gotten pretty used to putting on a show for people, not letting them see through her. She knows the only two people that can actually do that are the ones sitting at the table with her throughout the signings.

She’s able to muster up a smile and a cheerful attitude, laying it on thick for everyone that comes through her line. Part of her is glad she doesn’t have to keep this up any more days. 

She still has fun talking to people about her books and how they relate to their own lives . She loves hearing about other people and how they found her stories or how they connected with them. It was something that she hoped for when she began writing and to know it happened gives her hope for her future stories as well.

During any down time that they may have at the actually signings, she doesn’t make much small talk with Waverly as she usually does. The brunette seems a little off even if she has a big smile on her face to greet guests. Nicole can see right through it and it causes the pain to burn inside of her. She knows Waverly is trying to give her space, but she just wishes that should wouldn't.

She misses the feeling of Waverly’s hand resting on her leg under the table. She misses the encouraging squeeze to her knee when Waverly must know she’s feeling anxious. She misses the seductive, yet slightly possessive slide of the hand she gets when a pretty girl bats her eyelashes back at her. 

She catches a few glimpses of Rosita watching her at times, but quickly looks away, avoiding eye contact. She hasn’t really spoken too much to her since that morning after she slept with Waverly, unless it has to do with their schedule or some event they have coming up. She tries to keep conversation with both women strictly about the tour and typical business talk.

After the close of one of her signings, Rosita approaches her as they are cleaning up her table before heading back to the hotel.

“You okay, Haught?” she asks. 

Nicole looks around, not seeing Waverly in sight.

“Great,” she responds, her tone is flat and dry. “Just tired.”

“Nicole, I’m not trying to ruin your life here,” Rosita says as if she's trying to defend herself.

She knows that Rosita is looking out for her and even Waverly, but that should be something that’s up to them. 

“It is what it is, I guess, right?” Nicole shrugs.

She looks down at the wedding band on her left ring finger.

“You win.” 

She thinks she sees a bit of remorse on the face of her publicist. It’s almost as if she actually feels bad for treating Nicole the way she has been. Rosita’s eyes trail down to her ring finger, then back to her eyes, giving her an empathetic look in return.

“You know what sucks the most?” Nicole asks.

Rosita doesn’t respond.

“It’s not even a scandal, Rosie. It’s something that you fabricated because you thought it would complicate things if people knew I was a just a normal human being.”

“Nicole, I’m-" Rosita begins.

Nicole cuts her off, she doesn’t want her apology right now. She thinks it’s a little late for that.

“You know Waverly pretty well also, Rosita, and the fact that you want to sit here and tell me she’s only interested in my fame," she explains. "That really sucks.”

Nicole feels her anger boiling inside of her. She’s trying not to explode on the woman in the middle of a bookstore that just allowed her to have a signing at. There are still people scattered throughout the store so she's trying to keep it fairly quiet and not cause a scene.

She keeps her tone stern, but as hushed as possible. Rosita continues to look back at her, allowing to continue to speak.

“I think some days you forget I’m not just a business opportunity, I’m a person,” Nicole adds with a shrug.

She shakes her head at the woman.

“Will you call us a car? I’m ready to go back to the hotel,” she says as she closes the box of books on the table in front of her.

“I know you hate me, Nicole,” Rosita finally speaks.

“I don’t hate you, Rosita,” Nicole reassured her. “You’re an excellent publicist and you’ve done more for my career than I would have ever done without you,” she admits. “I just don’t like the situation. But I’m going to work with what I have right now and if it means that I have to wait for Waverly, then I will.”

“I’m sorry, Nicole,” the woman says.

Her tone is genuine, Nicole can read that. Her eyes are soft, almost as if they’re full of pain for the hurt she’s caused the redhead.

“It’s a little late for apologies, but I guess it’s a nice gesture,” the redhead replies.

Rosita doesn’t argue with her, she just nods in return. They’re soon joined by Waverly again, who helps them continue to clean up.

“Sorry,” the brunette says with a smile. “Bathroom.”

“It’s fine,” Nicole says, laughing softly.

She catches a glimpse of Rosita watching their small interaction. She doesn’t seem to look mad, or suspicious or give them any of the other looks that she has throughout the tour. Nicole tries not to draw attention to it, but it’s almost as if Rosita is looking at them and seeing, for the first time, what they’ve seen in each other all along.

📖

The final stop on the tour is in Chicago. Nicole was pretty excited about this stop in the beginning, it is a city she hasn't visited before, but has always wanted to. Her excitement for most things isn’t quite where it’s been, but she’s trying to make the best of it.

Rosita has been overly friendly toward Nicole and Waverly as if she’s trying to make up for the last couple of weeks and what she's put them through. She doesn’t push talking about anything in particular, but her overly excited attitude is both a bit strange and a bit comical to Nicole.

She gives Nicole the rundown of the last event of the tour. It's happening later in the evening, unlike the usual daytime signings that she has been doing. In the beginning of the tour, Nicole and Waverly would joke about how Chicago was their "grand finale" and they were going to make it huge. It’s another bigger bookstore setting, one that Nicole would normally be intimidated by, but has grown pretty used to. She figures that this point, she can probably handle anything.

As Rosita goes over the details of the da, possible numbers of guests attending, and a quick itinerary of the order of the evening, Nicole finds herself to be only half listening. She’s staring at her suitcase, trying to figure out what to wear.

She never really thinks that much into it, and just grabs whatever looks good and clean that day, but she remembers a conversation she and Waverly had earlier in the trip about how it would be fun to spend the last night of the tour dressed up and celebrating the journey of the last month and a half.

She might not find every part of the tour to be something to celebrate, but she’s still ready to celebrate something. Her goal is to at least make the best out of the night. She’s unsure if Waverly is going to keep up with the idea, but part of her hopes the brunette at least notices that she made the effort on her end.

As the event nears, Nicole feels nerves bubbling inside of her. She tries to get them to calm down by sitting down to write a bit. She feels some inspiration in the moment and wants to take advantage of it.

Rosita and Waverly show up at her room with plans for dinner. She opens the door and lets them in, but quickly returns to her seat at her computer.

“I’m really not feeling it right now,” Nicole admits and she continues trying to type the words as they appear in her head.

“You sure?” Rosita asks.

“We found this place right around the corner, I think you’d like it,” Waverly adds.

“Yeah,” Nicole hums. “I think I’m going to stay in and write,” she tells them. “You two go, have fun. I’ll be fine, promise,” she adds with a wink.

Rosita doesn’t protest. Waverly looks a little disappointed, but Nicole doesn’t spend too much time studying her face. She doesn’t want to see the possible pain that she could be causing by avoiding spending extra time with her.

“We’ll be back to pick you up for the event tonight,” Rosita tells her.

“Thanks guys,” she says as she looks up briefly from her computer.

Waverly gives her one last look. She catches a glimpse of hazel eyes looking back at her. She gives her a soft smile in return and sucks in a deep breath of air. She finds herself holding her breath until the door closes behind the other two women after they leave her alone.

She continues typing, sometimes mindless, unsure of what she’s even writing. The sound of her phone vibrating on the table next to her breaks her from any bit of concentration that she had left.

She turns to the side to see who’s calling and gives her phone a strange look when she sees her ex wife’s name on her screen. She slides her chair out a little from the table and grabs the phone, siding her thumb across the screen to answer.

“Shae?” she asks, holding her phone out in front of her face.

She sees the face of her ex wife, for the first time since she left for the tour. They had exchanged a few texts here and there, but she’s confused about why she’s FaceTiming her right now.

“Catch you off guard?” the other woman asks with a laugh.

Nicole finds herself laughing in return.

“Yeah, a little,” she admits. “I guess I didn’t expect to see your face until I got back home.”

“Honestly, I didn’t know if you’d answer,” Shae tells her.

“Nothing better to do,” Nicole says with a shrug of her shoulders. She closes her laptop on the table and turns away from it, avoiding any chance of noticing it taunting her as she does anything but what she is supposed to do.

“Ouch, I know we’re not going to be married anymore, but that doesn’t mean you can’t hurt my feelings,” Shae teases.

Nicole laughs and shakes her head.

“That’s not really what I meant.”

“I know, I know,” Shae laughs. “So how’s the tour been? I’m sorry I haven’t had time to really check in on you. I also kind of didn’t know if you wanted me to.”

The other woman's tone goes from joking to a little timid rather quickly. The change in her is a little strange to Nicole. Even through their separation and divorce process, Shae and Nicole have never really been ones to walk on eggshells around each other.

“I’ve been busy too,” Nicole assures her. “And I haven’t been the greatest at communication, don’t sweat it.”

She stands from her chair and walks over to the bed. She moves the pillows and sits so her back is leaning against the headboard.

“So what’s going on with you now?” Shae asks.

Nicole looks back at her, confused.

“What do you mean?”

“Something's clearly on your mind,” the other woman tells her, all-knowingly.

Nicole huffs and rolls her eyes at her. She knows she’s right, but that doesn’t mean she wants her to be.

“How do you know that?”

“Did you forget we’ve been married?” Shae teases. “I still know you and your faces, Nicole.”

“I guess a lot has happened,” Nicole finally admits.

She thinks back to the last time she saw Shae, the day she left for the tour. She thinks about the places she’s seen and the things she’s done since she’s been gone. She thinks about the traveling, the food, the sightseeing. She thinks about Rosita and her “rules.” She thinks about Waverly and everything they’ve been through.

“Like what?”

“I don’t want to burden you with my problems,” the redhead says, trying to avoid talking about it.

“I have time,” Shae says.

Nicole sees her sit down on the couch that was once hers as well. Just behind Shae’s head, she can see what’s left of the coffee stain she created when she accidentally stubbed her toe, tripping over their coffee table. At the time, she wasn’t sure if she was more upset about her toe or the fact that she had the last of the hot coffee in that mug.

She groans and dramatically throws her head back against the headboard behind her. She knows Shae is right, and she also knows that she isn’t going to give it up until Nicole tells her.

“Well, I kind of kissed Waverly.”

“And?” Shae asks.

She’s clearly not surprised, as if she was expecting it to happen the day they all left the house.

“And what?” Nicole huffs. “Why are acting like you knew?”

“Like I said, I know you,” Shae informs her.

“Well it was actually more than that,” Nicole adds as if she’s trying to provide Shae with information that she didn’t guess would happen.

“Nicole, this isn’t really news to me,” her ex wife tells her.

“It’s not?”

Nicole groans internally. Maybe she’s the only one who didn’t realize that she and Waverly were meant to be together.

“Apparently I know you better than you think,” Shae laughs. “I knew Waverly was the one I’d have to compete with from the start.”

Nicole gives her a confused look. She never thought that her friendship with Waverly was something that made her romantic relationships more difficult. But then again, maybe she’s just blind to it.

“It wasn’t a competition, Shae,” Nicole tells her. “Nothing happened with me and Waverly while we were together.”

“I know that, Nicole. I don’t think that at all,” Shae assures her. “And no, it wasn’t a competition. There’s no competing against her. And I’m okay with that.”

Nicole isn’t sure how to take all of this. Shae is so calm and cool about everything right now and she’s almost surprised that she isn’t more upset about it. Not that she wants to upset anyone, it just feels too easy. Maybe she’s the one making it all complicated in her own head.

“Why are you being so cool about this?” she asks.

“I’ve had some time to think. And a couple of margaritas after work,” she laughs. “Our marriage ended, Nicole. Things happen. And I’m okay with that. We had fun while it lasted, I don’t regret it. But that doesn’t mean you don’t deserve to find happiness. I want you to be happy.”

“Thanks,” she says with a smile. “And same goes for you, Shae. You know, if you ever need to talk about girls or whatever,” she spits out awkwardly.

She immediately kicks herself internally. Outwardly, she laughs at her comment. Shae just gives her a look that makes her laugh harder.

“I made it weird,” Nicole laughs. 

“It’s fine,” Shae laughs. 

There’s something about Shae’s laugh that calms her. She thinks part of her felt guilty that she was ready to move on so quickly as their marriage came to an end. But when she really thinks about it, it didn’t just end, they’ve been separated for a while now and she does feel ready to move on.

“So you’ve really known that I’d end up with feelings for Waverly?” she asks.

She’s not sure Shae even wants to continue talking about Waverly, but she hasn’t really had anyone else to discuss her feelings with lately.

“Did you even read your second book?” the other woman laughs.

“What?”

“Sloane was always in love with Avery,” Shae says.

She’s surprised that Shae even read her book. Not that she wasn’t supportive, but she was always so busy and she’s not sure where she found time to read.

“I didn’t even make that a thing until the third book,” the redhead laughs. “And it’s just a book, Shae. Sloane and Avery aren’t real people.”

“Aren’t they?” the woman questions, raising her eyebrows at her.

“Maybe there’s some influence, but that doesn’t mean I meant for them to fall in love.”

“It was inevitable,” Shae says, shrugging her shoulders.

Nicole pauses for a moment.

“Was it that obvious?”

“I think it’s different when you’re living it,” the woman explains.

“Did you feel like I put her first over you?”

She’s not sure she wants to hear the answer, but she asks her anyway.

“You loved me the best you ever could, Nicole,” Shae answers honestly. “Trust me, I have no complaints. I don’t regret our time together, it just wasn’t meant to be forever. I think we both know that.”

Nicole nods.

“So are you two officially a thing or what?” Shae asks in a teasing tone. 

“Not exactly,” Nicole admits.

Her demeanor changes a bit and she’s sure Shae can sense it.

“Uh oh. What did you do?”

“Why did I have to do something?” Nicole asks, defensively. “I thought you said I was good.”

“I’m just teasing you,” Shae laughs. “You can be good and still do stupid things.”

Nicole laughs.

“Well it wasn’t really me, it was Rosita,” she explains. “She has this idea that people aren’t going to look up to me the same way if they see that my marriage ended and I’m not this perfect role model for the community.”

“Contrary to popular belief, lesbians sometimes fall out of love too.”

“I know that,” she assures her. “She didn’t want it to look like I cheated on you on tour and she thinks Waverly only wants me because I have a popular book series,” she summarizes.

“She sounds like she’s been filling your head with a bunch of garbage, Nicole.”

The woman’s tone is more stern now.

“It’s hard not to listen to it after a while,” Nicole admits.

“I think what surprises me the most is that you’re going along with that,” Shae tells her.

“What do you mean?”

“I’ve known you to be a lot of things, but I’ve never known you to be afraid,” she says.

Nicole pauses for a moment, listening to the words coming out of Shae’s mouth. She’s calm and has this way about her. She’s supportive, but never put up with any bullshit.

“You’ve always stood up for what you believed in, did what was best for you,” she continues.

“And how do I know what’s best for me?” Nicole asks.

“What do you want the most right now?”

“To be with Waverly.”

She answers so quickly that her brain barely has time to catch up with the words coming out of her mouth. When she hears what she said, she sticks with it. If she could have just one thing in this entire world, it would be Waverly, and she stands by that.

“Then fight for her. Don’t act like she’s not worth the fight because we all know damn well that she is,” Shae says. “Waverly Earp is incredible and for you to be lucky enough to be with her, you better fight like hell for it.”

“I’m not even sure she’s going to want me after all this,” Nicole admits.

“Did she say that?”

“She suggested we put it on pause, get through the rest of the tour and figure it out then. I went with it because it was better than breaking it off totally,” she explains. “I think that was her way of trying to put less pressure on me.”

She shrugs.

“And how has it been since then?” Shae asks.

“Weird, I guess,” Nicole recalls. “I don’t know how to go backwards with her, just be best friends.”

“Then don’t,” Shae says sternly.

Nicole wishes it was that easy. She wishes that she could just continue on her life with Waverly. She wishes she didn’t have to deal with other people’s opinions breathing down her neck, that she didn’t have to hide.

She wishes she wasn’t scared

“Don't wait until everything is over because you’re afraid of what people will think now,” Shae continues.

“I mean, it’s kind of already over, just one more event tonight and we’ll be on our way home.”

“But it’s not over,” Shae explains. “Don’t let anything be over until you’re ready for that.”

Nicole smiles back at the woman. She’s finally hearing the words that she needed to hear; words that she hasn’t been brave enough to tell herself.

“Thanks, Shae, this means more to me than you’ll ever know,” she tells her.

“No problem,” Shae smiles. “Oh, and Nicole?”

“Yeah?”

“Stop wearing that god damn ring,” the woman tells her, shaking her head at her.

Nicole feels her cheeks blush a bit as she holds her hand up in front of her face.

“Publicity,” she explains with a shrug.

Shae rolls her eyes, shaking her head at her again.

“So, where is Waverly now?” She asks, changing the subject a bit.

“Out to dinner with Rosita.”

“They left you alone?” She acts overly shocked but laughs at the same time.

“I didn’t give them much of a choice,” Nicole tells her. “Rosita’s been coming down on me hard about the book so I told her I had to stay in and write. I told her off a little the other day, so I think she’s trying to give me space and let me be alone for once.”

“Good,” the other woman laughs.

“Why?” Nicole asks.

“That woman needs to be put in her place sometimes,” Shae says, tone full of sass that makes Nicole laughs.

“She’s not a bad person, she just has a weird way of doing things,” Nicole says, sticking up for her for some reason.

“Well,” Shae begins. “Don’t let her stop you from being you,” she says. “You may not be my forever, so I’m not sure what this means coming from me, but you’re still pretty great, Nicole Haught.”

Nicole can’t help but smile back at her. She never knew how much she needed this conversation until now.

“Thanks, Shae,” she says again. “I needed someone to slap some sense back into me.”

“Call me any time then,” Shae laughs, giving her a wink.

Nicole laughs again. “Sure thing,” she teases. “Hey look, I should probably get ready for this thing tonight.”

“Oh yeah, yeah, I won’t keep you,” the other woman says. “I almost forgot though,” she adds. “One of the reasons I called was to let you know the papers arrived this morning so when you get back, you can finally be done with me.” She winks.

“Just what I wanted,” Nicole teases, receiving a laugh from Shae in return. “I’m just kidding,” she tells her.

“Me too,” Shae adds. “But we will get it all sorted when you’re back.”

“Sounds good,” she says.

It sounds weird coming out of her mouth. She’s making jokes about her divorce with the woman she is divorcing; things have sure changed. They chat idly for a few more moments before finally hanging up so Nicole can get ready for the evening.

📖

As she’s getting reading, she receives a text from Rosita, telling her that a limo will be picking her up out front of the hotel and it will take her to the event space.She feels like the text was a little cryptic and made it sound like the other two women wouldn’t be joining her in the limo, but she doesn’t think too much about it.

Mostly she just wonders why she has a limo coming to get her and not just an Uber. She feels like that’s just going to draw more attention to her as she arrives, but doesn’t ask questions, and just decides to go with it. She’s trying to find positive things to think about, instead of dwelling on the things that she cannot control.

As she turns back toward her clothes again, still not sure of what she’s going to wear, she finds herself stuck between two shirt choices. She gravitates toward the blue one, it’s a button down shirt with tiny, white polka dots on it.

It’s Waverly’s favorite.

It’s the one she chooses to wear.

When she finally feels like she’s presentable and ready to make her way outside to wait for her ride, she gives herself one more once over in the mirror or her hotel room.

She smooths out the front of her shirt, trying to avoid too many wrinkles before she has to stand up in front of a crowd of people. She turns back toward the table in her room, remembering her room key.

Before picking up the plastic card to take it with her, her eye catches a shiny piece of metal sitting on the table next to it. She touches it for a moment, running her fingers lightly over the top, before she leaves it on the table. Tucking her room key into her pocket, she heads for the door.

As she makes her way outside in front of the hotel, she thinks about how she has three goals for the night:

To finish the tour strong, feeling proud of all she’s done.

To take control of her life again, not letting anyone else choose how she decides to live.

And to win her girl back.

She’s not outside long before a limo pulls up to the front of the hotel, rolling to a stop. She still thinks the limo is a little over the top, but she thanks the driver as he opens the door for her to climb in.

Once inside, she catches a glimpse of Waverly, alone, and gives her a puzzled look. 

“Waves? Where’s Rosita?” she asks the brunette who’s greeting her with a smile. 

Her heart thumps so hard in her chest that it’s practically in her throat.

“She said she’ll meet us there,” Waverly says.

Her heart continues to pound in her chest at the sight of the woman in front of her. The dress she’s wearing, the heels, her hair curled in loose waves, she looks incredible. 

As the limo starts to move, she finds herself unable to take her eyes off of Waverly. It’s dark, but her beauty glows in the moonlight. 

She’s quiet at first, lost in her thoughts. She thinks about every moment she’s spent with Waverly since they first left for tour. She thinks about what life is going to be like when she goes back home. She thinks about what she’s going to say to Rosita when she finally sees her. 

She feels the brunette’s fingers brush lightly against her left hand as she lifts it from Nicole’s side. She pulls it a little closer to her. Nicole doesn’t mind the contact. She watches as Waverly carefully studies her hand, she stares more specifically her ring finger. She slowly lifts her head, catching Waverly’s eyes on the way up.

“You took it off,” she says, softly running her thumb over where Nicole’s wedding band once was.

“I can’t keep doing it,” Nicole admits.

Waverly’s hazel eyes meet hers. She doesn’t speak. 

“I can’t pretend anymore,” the redhead continues.

She doesn’t let go of Waverly’s hand. She smoothly flips her hand, pressing her palm against the brunette’s, lifting up in between them. She feels Waverly shift her fingers to the side until they’re laced together. 

“So what does that mean?” Waverly asks.

Nicole doesn’t let go of the brunette’s hand as she lifts herself from her seat, sliding next to where Waverly is sitting. Waverly turns her head to regain eye contact with the redhead. 

Nicole lifts her free hand, brushing her fingers lightly across Waverly’s cheek. The brunette closes her eyes for a moment and takes a deep breath in. Nicole lifts her finger under Waverly’s chin, lifting it slightly as she leans in, pressing their lips together softly for a moment. 

“It means I’m done with the charade,” Nicole says in a serious tone. “I’m telling Rosita we have to go public about the divorce,” she says. “I talked to Shae. She said the papers arrived this morning. It's official.” 

“You’re sure?” Waverly says.

Nicole knows what the consequences of this decision are. She knows that people are most likely going to start searching her personal life to figure out what happened. They’re going to wonder what went wrong so quickly because they have no idea that Nicole and Shae have actually been separated for the majority of the year. But this is all something she’s willing to deal with to be with the woman in front of her. 

“I’ve never been more sure,” Nicole tells her. “And also I’m telling you that I want to be with you,” she says. “I don’t want a pause, Waverly, I want you.”

As the words come out of her mouth, she is calm and sure of what she is saying. 

“You want to be with me?” Waverly asks as if she didn't hear her the first time.

Her voice falters a bit like it’s full of emotion. 

“I do. I want this, Waverly,” Nicole tells her again. “I want you. I want all of you.”

She can’t help but smile, hearing the words finally coming out of her own mouth. It’s what she wanted to say the day that Waverly suggested the pause. It’s what she wanted to say when she told Rosita that she won and she would do things her way.

It’s what she should have said then, but she’s saying it now. She just hopes that she’s not too late.

“I’m really glad you’re saying that, Nicole, because it’s really been hard to act like I’m not absolutely in love with you every day,” the brunette says.

Waverly grabs her hands and brings one close to her face, pressing a soft kiss against her skin. Nicole is shocked at what she just said, she almost thinks she was imagining it.

“You’re in love with me?” she asks.

Waverly nods. The smile on her face grows until the creases next to her eyes appear. Nicole feels her heart pounding in her chest again. It reminds her that she’s exactly where she wants to be.

“Okay good, because I love you too,” the redhead breathes out before leaning in and quickly pressing her lips against the brunette’s.

It’s not long before the brunette is rotating her body and Nicole feels the weight of her small frame on her lap. She hikes up her dress a bit to comfortably straddle the redhead’s lap, bodies pressed up against each other. 

They stay connected by the lips, their kiss deepens as time goes on. She doesn’t care that they’re in the back of a limo, the thought barely crosses her mind in that moment. All she wants to do is show Waverly how much she loves her and that’s what she’s going to do.

Waverly kisses her hard, not giving her time for her brain to react, but her hands don’t waste time as they find Waverly’s hips, fingers digging slightly into her body. The kiss deepens again, tongues brush and a small moan escapes the brunette’s mouth. 

She hopes the divider between the driver and them is soundproof, but she still doesn’t stop to think too much about it. She slides her hands from Waverly’s hips up her bare thighs, grasping at the warm skin. She feels Waverly take a sharp breath in, as she continues to slide her hands further up, thumbs brushing against her inner thighs. 

Nicole can't help herself as she presses her thumb against Waverly’s center, over the thin material that blocks her from touching her bare skin. Another soft moan escapes from Waverly’s mouth, causing Nicole to slide her fingers under the material, quickly pushing them into her wetness.

She’s not sure how much time she really has, but everything in her wants to not leave Waverly hanging. She feels the desire to please the woman in front of her burning inside of her as she moves her hand at a rhythm, feeling the brunette move her hips in synchronization with her hand. 

Waverly presses her face into Nicole’s neck as her breathing speeds up. Nicole can feel her hot breath against her ear, sending a shiver down her spine. 

“Nicole,” Waverly whispers against her ear. “I’m so close.”

That’s all Nicole needs to hear before speeding up her movements a little more, feeling Waverly come undone on top of her. A sight that she will never get tired of.

She steadies her hand as Waverly’s breathing calms. When the brunette lifts her head from Nicole’s shoulder, Nicole slowly pulls her hand away. Waverly stands up briefly, as well she she can, adjusting herself.

Nicole reaches her hand out to help the woman steady herself. When she sits back down next to her, a grin forms on Nicole’s face. 

“Are you proud of yourself?” Waverly asks with a smile.

The redhead nods back at her and moves her arm up to the back of the seat, allowing Waverly to press up against her side.

“Maybe,” Nicole says, still smiling. 

She raises her eyebrows playfully at the brunette and gives her a quick wink.

“Okay, okay,” Waverly says with a laugh.

“Just making up for lost time,” the redhead teases.

Through the pain of the past few days, the only other thing her brain could focus on was Waverly. She couldn't stop thinking about feeling her body on her own, the feel of her smooth skin, the soft sounds that she elicits with every touch.

Waverly laughs and playfully slaps Nicole on the arm. She leans in, pressing a kiss on Nicole’s cheek before resting her head on her shoulder.

“Well, I didn’t mind,” Waverly admits, causing Nicole to laugh.

“Me neither,” the redhead whispers in return, gently squeezing Waverly’s thigh with her free hand.

Waverly smiles back at her and laces her fingers between Nicole’s as their hands rest on the brunette’s lap. She briefly closes her eyes, soaking in the moment of quiet. She feels her heart pounding in her chest. She's finally exactly where she wants to be.

“So what’s up with the limo?” Nicole finally asks when she opens her eyes. She glances around them a little. “I mean, I’m not complaining, but if was definitely surprised,” she laughs.

“It was my idea,” Waverly admits sheepishly. “We talked about making tonight fancy, remember?"

Nicole nods. She can’t help but smile. She was hoping she’d remember also. But of course she did, it’s Waverly. She remembers everything. Nicole is just glad she didn’t give up on her after she almost blew everything they had between the two of them.

“I wasn’t sure if you’d still go for it, but I thought it was worth a try,” Waverly explains. “Hence the dress.” 

The brunette gestures toward her outfit. Nicole takes the opportunity to look her up and down again. She can't see too much of her body due to the fact that they're still seated, but she catches a glimpse of the brunette's muscular legs through the darkness.

“I love that dress,” Nicole reminds her. “You look beautiful.” She looks back up at Waverly's face, gently rubbing her thumb against her cheek. "You always do."

The brunette’s cheek blush in the moonlight and she can make out a hint of green in her eyes.

“I wasn’t sure if you’d remember, honestly,” Nicole admits. "I tried to dress up, I don't own a dress," she teases.

Waverly laughs.

“I haven’t forgotten anything, Nicole,” she tells her.

“Did you tell Rosita to get lost too?” Nicole asks.

She laughs a little but it’s not fully a joke.

“No,” Waverly tells her. “We had a good talk over dinner though. She was overly apologetic, it was weird at first,” the brunette admits. "I told her how I felt about everything, I think she actually listened to me this time."

"She better not have hit on you," Nicole warns.

Waverly shakes her head and laughs.

"I think that was just to get to you," she admits. "And apparently it worked," she teases, playfully poking Nicole in the side.

Nicole glares at the brunette, but she's not sure if she noticed it in the dark.

“I noticed a bit of a change in her too,” she says. “I planned on talking to her before the event. Talking to Shae really shook some sense into me.”

“Oh yeah?” the brunette questions.

“Apparently I was the only person in the universe that didn’t realize I was in love with you,” Nicole says, causing Waverly to laugh.

“It was only a matter of time,” Waverly teases, winking back at her.

She nuzzles into her side a little more. Nicole wraps her arm further around her shoulder, trying to pull her impossibly close to her own body. It feels comfortable and normal. They continue to chat back and forth throughout the rest of the drive. She’s not sure how long they’ve been traveling, but she’s thankful for the Chicago traffic that’s keeping her alone with Waverly for longer.

Waverly tells her more about her dinner with Rosita and how she seems to feel bad for causing problems in Nicole’s life. She told Waverly that she sees how much they care about each other and doesn’t want to stand in the way of that. Nicole wishes that she could have said that to her from the start, but she knows that she can't go back and change that.

Nicole tells her more about her conversation with Shae. Waverly is understanding and glad she had someone to sort out her thoughts with. Nicole thinks that Waverly wishes the conversation was with her, but it’s still better than keeping it all inside.

They remain sitting close to each other throughout their entire time in the limo. They hold hands and share kisses from time to time. Everything feels perfect for a the first time in a while.

It’s not long before the limousine comes to a stop at their location. Nicole immediately feels a pit in her stomach as if the perfect moment just came crashing to an end and she had to go back to facing reality.

Waverly is encouraging, telling her that everything is going to be alright. They thank the driver as they exit the vehicle. Nicole silently hopes that he didn’t hear anything that just happened in the backseat. She acts as if nothing happened and continues on her way.

She doesn't hold Waverly's hand on the way into the building, but she wishes she did. They meet up with Rosita, who is talking to the owner of the bookstore that the event is located at. The other woman gives them a quick rundown, letting them know that they need to start soon. Rosita blames traffic for the delay, but explained that most of the people are already seated and waiting for her to start.

As they move further into the building, Nicole can hear the low roar of a crowd of people talking. It's something she's rather used to by now, but it does make her a little nervous still. She knows she has to get ready to talk to the crowd of people, but she knows that she isn't going to be ready until she finally has a chance to talk to Rosita.

After Rosita gives them a rundown of the evening, that Nicole is only half listening to, she pulls her to the side for a moment.

"Rosita, can I talk to you for a minute?" she asks.

The woman looks a little flustered by the question as if it's interrupting her routine.

"We’re running a little late, can it wait until after?" she asks as she looks around the room a little, then down to her clipboard where he schedule must be.

"No, not really," Nicole tells her.

Rosita looks at her and pauses for a moment. It's almost as if she's actually reading her expression and feeling that she needs to get something off her chest. The woman lets out a sigh and nods.

"Yeah, go ahead," she finally says.

"I’ll be over there," Waverly gestures behind them.

She's unsure of where the brunette is going, but appreciates being left alone for a minute to have this conversation.

"Thanks," Nicole says with a smile and a nod.

Waverly gently squeezes her arm, encouraging her.

"What’s up, Haught?" Rosita asks.

She seems a bit distracted still, but Nicole starts talking anyway. 

"I have to come clean, Rosita, it’s killing me," she admits. "Keeping it all in, not being able to just be me. I don't have to announce all of my personal business, but I can't pretend anymore."

Rosita pauses, listening to her talk. She nods in response.

"I know it might put focus on things that aren’t important, but it’s important to me. I don’t want to hide anymore. I love Waverly, my marriage with Shae is over, and I’m okay with that," she continues to explain. "I know you wanted me to stick with this plan, but if it means I can't follow my heart, I'm not doing it anymore."

"Okay," is all the other woman says in response.

"Okay?" Nicole asks.

"Look, Nicole," Rosita says. "I had all intentions on protecting you, your personal life and your career. I came here to help you promote your book. And that’s what we did. I thought maybe you wouldn’t get far with the next book if you were distracted, but Waverly made you write more than I have ever been able to get you to do."

Nicole is surprised by the words coming out of her mouth. Part of her was beginning to think that Rosita's tunnel vision of Nicole finishing her book and giving her more work to do was stopping her from seeing what was real.

"She inspires you, Nicole," the woman continues. "I’ve never been blind to that. I just didn’t think it was a good time to start something, but who am I to make that choice for you?"

"Not that I don’t appreciate all of this," Nicole finally replies. "But where is this sudden change coming from?"

"I’ve had some time to think too," Rosita explains. "And I don’t like doing that to you. I know it probably doesn’t feel like it, but I do care about you and your happiness too."

"You have a weird way of showing it," Nicole says with a laugh.

She feels like she's accepting the apology a little quickly, but the time she spent with Waverly in the limo has her feeling like she's walking on clouds right now and it feels like nothing can bother her knowing that she has the brunette in her life still.

"Waverly is good for you," Rosita admits. "She keeps you in line when I can’t," she teases, pushing Nicole playfully on the arm.

The redhead laughs.

"She’s pretty great," she says, looking around to see if she can find where the brunette went. 

"She is," Rosita agrees. "So you’re really ready for people to know?"

Nicole pauses for a moment and looks back at her publicist. She really thinks about the words she asked and where she is in her life right now. She feels confident in her choice and nods in response.

"I think so. I mean, yeah, I am," she stutters a little. "I think there are things that I'd like to keep to myself, but I’m ready to go public with the divorce. I can’t keep lying."

"Things you'd like to keep to yourself like that lipstick on your neck?" Rosita teases.

Nicole quickly brings her hand to her neck, rubbing her skin frantically. Rosita breaks out into laughter.

"I was just kidding," she says through her laughter.

Nicole glares back at her.

"I trust you to do what’s best for you," Rosita adds.

She speaks the words that Nicole wishes she had heard from her weeks ago. It's almost surreal that she's finally hearing what she needed to hear from the start. She smiles in response, nodding her head, agreeing that she was going to make the best choice she could for herself.

"So is there going to be a new villain in the next book that I’ve inspired?" her publicist asks with a laugh.

Nicole laughs.

"No, you’re Sloane's overbearing mother that comes back in book two," she tells her.

Rosita narrows her eyes at the redhead.

"Very funny," she huffs.

"It’s funnier that you think I’m joking," the redhead replies with a laugh.

Rosita continues to glare back and her as they're approached by a blonde woman, who is also holding a clipboard in her hands.

"Hey, sorry to interrupt," the woman says. "But are you almost ready to get start? Chairs are filling up," she adds with a smile.

"Oh yes, sorry," Rosita says quickly. "Nicole, this is Eliza, the store owner, she's going to introduce you in a few before you do your reading," she explains.

Nicole puts her hand out in front of her to shake the woman's hand. "Nice to meet you," she says with a smile. "Thank you again for having us."

"Thank you for coming," Eliza replies. She gestures for the pair to follow her toward the area that is set up for her event. "Your name has been buzzing around here for weeks. I'm glad you're finally here!"

Nicole laughs at the comment. She’s still not sure if she will ever get used to feeling somewhat “famous” in the book community. She feels like people might over exaggerate the amount of anticipation there really has been for her arrival. Her thoughts are quickly interrupted when she makes her way over toward the crowd of people that seated in the chairs on one side of the large bookstore.

She sucks in a deep breath, feeling suddenly overwhelmed by the amount of people, but still excited. They’re standing behind the crowd, she doesn’t think anyone has actually seen her standing there. The people continue to talk amongst themselves as they wait.

Her eyes scan the room, locking on Waverly’s when they reach her. She feels a calm come over her; a power that the brunette holds over her.

Waverly smiles at her, it’s infectious and she smiles in return. She makes her way to the brunette’s side and feels her fingers run softly down her arm.

“How was it?” Waverly asks.

“It went really well, actually,” she replies.

Waverly smiles in return.

“Good,” she says. “You ready for your last reading of the tour?”

She hears the words that seemed so far away at the beginning of the tour, but arrived quicker than she could have ever imagined. She nods and tries to swallow down what’s left of her nerves.

“Let’s do this,” she says, giving the brunette a wink.

She nudges her lightly with her elbow and heads in the direction that Rosita is gesturing for her to go. Eliza is now standing at the podium in front of the crowd of people. The noise level is a lot lower and she hears her name come from the blonde’s mouth.

There’s an unanimous cheer mixed with clapping that fills the room. She gives Waverly one more look, catching another glimpse of her beautiful smile before she approaches the podium.

She goes through introducing herself, although she doesn’t know if it’s even necessary. She assumes that people know her name by now, but she tells them anyway. She gives a brief rundown of how she’s been traveling over the past month and a half and a bit of her journey to becoming an author.

“It’s been a wild ride to say the least,” the redhead jokes.

She finds herself becoming more and more comfortable with the crowd as time goes on. It definitely helps that they laugh at all of her dumb jokes.

“So who wants to hear a little bit of the story?” she asks.

There’s an instant cheer throughout the crowd, encouraging her to start reading. As she looks down at the podium to grab her book, she sees Rosita and Waverly standing off to her left. She steals a glance in their direction, giving Waverly a quick smile before she opens up to her bookmarked page.

As she begins reading, her body is filled with a whirlwind of emotions. She’s a little sad that this adventure is almost over, but she’s excited for the next one. She’s nervous about what’s going to happen next, but confident in herself to do what’s best for her.

She’s happy, she’s proud and she’s in love.

She reads a little more than she usually does, finding herself lost in the story of the characters that she developed. She finds herself relating to the characters more than she ever thought she did before.

She feels the pain of the main character who is trying to navigate herself through life, making a million mistakes along the way. She feels love for the best friend character that is always there along the way, no matter what. She feels the heartache, the growth, and the struggle that each character faces as it leads her into completing the story in the third book.

When she finishes reading different parts of the story, she looks up to find a very captivated audience in front of her. Her heart swells at the sight, feeling proud of herself in that moment to achieving this much her goals so far on her journey.

Eliza steps back over toward Nicole, thanking her for her reading and offers to open the floor for questions. Nicole’s eyes widen when she sees a bunch hands fly into the air. She’s unsure where to even start, but is thankful for Eliza doing facilitate questions.

“What do we have to look forward to with the new book?” a woman in the crowd asks.

Nicole smiles at the thought of the anticipation of her next book. She’s starting to become excited about it herself.

“Truth, honesty, discovery,” she answers. “Hopefully you all like the direction I’m taking it in. The characters have all grown so much since the beginning and, as weird as it sounds, I’m going to miss them.”

There’s soft laughter from the people in the room.

“Will there be another tour?” The next question is asked.

“I hope so,” Nicole says with a little laugh.

She gives Rosita a quick look and receives a wink back from her.

“It’s been a wild ride, but a lot of fun,” she tells them with a laugh. “Honestly, I didn’t know what to expect on a trip like this, but I guess I can confidently say one thing,” she continues. “I’ve learned a lot about myself over the past six weeks.”

“Are you happy to be going back home?”

Nicole stops to think for a moment. She thinks she is ready to go home, and she feels a lot better about it after talking to Shae about everything. She feels less guilty, less afraid of what’s to come.

“Yeah,” she says. “And actually, while we’re on the subject,” she adds. It’s now or never. “Speaking of truth, honest and discovery...”

She looks at Rosita again and pauses for a moment. Rosita nods at the redhead, allowing her to continue.

“I think it’s fair to be honest with all of you.” 

The crowd falls quiet and Nicole feels her nerves building inside of her. She suddenly misses the days where no one knew her so no one was in her business. 

“Some people have asked about my wife and I have always been open, within reason, about my relationship, being with a woman, my journey and my story,” she explains. “So that’s why I think it’s important to say that my wife and I been separated for almost a year now.”

There’s an audible gasp from the crowd. Nicole falters in her speech a bit. She’s still unsure why it matters so much to a bunch of strangers, but it matters to her that she doesn’t lie about her life anymore.

“We thought maybe bringing up my personal life would take away from the real reason for my tour, to promote my book, but I’m only human like anyone else here.”

There’s a cheer from the crowd, calming her nerves. She realizes that if she wants to be a role model, it’s important for her to be real. If she wants to be real, she’s going to have to be honest.

“I’ve discovered a lot about myself on this tour,” she reiterated. “And if there’s anything I want you all to take from this is that life is messy, sometimes it takes unexpected turns, but if you allow yourself to feel what you’re meant to feel, it can truly be beautiful.”

She can’t help but smile in the moment. She’s feeling more vulnerable than she has in a long time, but she doesn’t stop. She catches Waverly’s gaze from the corner of her eye, giving her a quick wink. Waverly smiles back at her. 

She sees Eliza heading for the podium smiling at her as she continues talking to the crowd. She whispers something into Nicole’s ear, letting her know they’re almost out of time for questions and need to move on to the signing.

“Thats my time warning,” she teases.

Eliza laughs. “We can take a few more questions,” she explains.

A bunch of hands shoot into the air. Theres a couple more questions asked about her plans for after our, where nice simply answers, “sleep.” gaining laughs.

There’s a question asked about future writing plans. Nicole reassures them that she doesn’t plan on giving up on the dream any time soon. 

“As long as I’m inspired, I keep going,” she tells them.

“What inspires you the most?”

Nicole pauses. She sees the crowd of faces staring back at her. She looks over at Rosita and Waverly, looking back at her. They both have had nothing but pride on their faces since she started speaking. She turns back to the crowd after a moment. 

“I’m going to keep that to myself for a little bit,” she says with a smile. “But this,” she says as she gestures around the room. “All of you,” she continues. “Has played a huge part in my inspiration.”

Eliza gives another queue to wrap up the questions before she moves on to her table to sign books.

“Unfortunately that’s all the tile we have for questions,”the blonde says. “But if you’d like to have a book signed, our wonderful author is going to be at the table behind us to do just thank,” the woman says.

Her tone is bubbly and she smiles at the crowd. Nicole smiles and nods in response.

“Thank you all for coming and I look forward to seeing you all at my table,” the redhead adds before she turns away from the podium, back toward Rosita and Waverly.

She feels like she’s on a high, ending the last reading of the touring she’s on top of the world. Rosita and Waverly as smiling when she reaches them.

“You did great, Nicole,” Rosita says, placing a hand on her shoulder.

“So great,” Waverly echos. Her hand finds its way to Nicole’s side and she squeezes gently.

“Thanks, guys,” the redhead says. “Better get to the table,” she adds as she gestures behind her.

The other women nod and they follow behind her. They settle in at the table and it’s not long before there’s a line of people wanting their books signed and a moment to speak with the author.

She feels Waverly’s hand resting on her leg under the table from time to time. She can’t help but smile when it happens. The brunette sits close to her at the table, much like they did in the beginning of the tour; Nicole has really missed that.

People are friendly and ask additional questions about her next book and plans for the future of her career. They don’t dive too much into asking questions about her personal life, which she appreciates. Maybe she was right, maybe they really don’t care about what goes on behind the scenes and they just want to read what she writes.

At the close of the signing, she suggests drinks to celebrate the end of the tour. They clean up and head out to a local bar, suggested by Eliza. It’s small and secluded, but it’s nice.

Nicole enjoys the quiet of not being in a place so busy that she can barely hear the people she is with. She orders a round of drinks for the group that they are with, including Eliza and a couple others from the bookstore.

They toast to the end of the tour and to the hope of another in the near future. Nicole finds herself falling into comfortable conversation with everyone that she's there with. She rests her hand on the back of Waverly's chair, her fingers gently rub the brunette's back at times. Nothing about it feels weird and she doesn't feel like she has to hide.

She talks to Rosita about the progress she's made on the new book, even offering for her to read it when she has the chance. It feels like it did in the beginning of her journey. There's excitement of new stories, new adventures and new opportunities. There's no stress of hiding or pretending to be anything she's not.

📖

The next morning, the sound of an alarm fills the air around her, breaking her from her sleeping state. She lets out an audible groan. The last thing she wants to do in this moment is get out of bed to rush to an airport and get on another airplane.

She knows that it is the last one she has to take for a while, but that doesn't really make it any better right now. Nothing feels better in this moment than laying in bed with Waverly, tangled up together. It feels calm, it's quiet and it's just the right amount of perfect that she needs.

She feels the brunette shift in the bed next to her, reaching over to her phone on the nightstand next to her. She taps the phone and the obnoxious sound finally stops. Waverly turns back toward her, draping her arm over the redhead's middle.

“What happened last night?” Nicole asks,” as if it was all a dream. Her voice is groggy and she moves her body to stretch her muscles, stiff from sleeping.

Waverly grins as she slides closer to her. Their bodies are flush against each other. The brunette presses a soft kiss against her forehead.

“I think you told the world you were in love with me,” she says, smiling into her eyes. She takes her finger and boops the redhead on the nose, causing her to laugh.

“Did I do something like that?” Nicole asks, as if she doesn’t already know.

She squints her eyes open further, a yawn escapes from her mouth.

“You did exactly that,” Waverly reminds her, a giggle bubbles from within her.

"I didn’t tell _everyone_ I was in love with you," Nicole reminds her. "There are some things that I am allowed to keep to myself for now," she adds with a wink.

"You told me ," Waverly says. She leans in and presses a kiss against the redhead's lips. It's soft and sweet, with no further intentions.

"And I meant every word of it," Nicole reminds her.

"I was hoping so," Waverly says with a laugh. "But you did announce your divorce," she reminds her.

"I sure did," she says with a laugh. Remember how much of weight was instantly lifted from her shoulders after that announcement. "I wasn’t ready to share you yet, though," Nicole laughs.

"That’s fine," Waverly assures her.

"Now what?" the redhead asks.

"What do you want to happen?"

"More of this," she says as she kisses the brunette again. "And maybe this," she adds as she lifts herself up in the bed, hovering over the other woman.

She begins pressing soft kisses down her neck and collarbone.

"I think that can be arranged," Waverly breathes out.

Nicole laughs as she kisses her on the lips again, something she doesn't want to stop doing.

"It’s weird not being on a schedule," Nicole admits. "Waking up on our time doesn’t feel real," she laughs as she drops back down onto the bed next to Waverly.

"Waking up with you doesn’t feel real," Waverly admits.

Nicole flashes her a dimpled grin in return. She's right, it doesn't feel real. But it does feel right.

"Well it is," the redhead replies, wiggling her eyebrows at the woman. "I love you," she adds. Her heart swells at the sight of the smile she receives in return.

"I love you, too, Nicole."

They spend a few more minutes laying in each other's arms. They stare into each other's eyes and steal kisses from time to time. She just wants to lay there forever, but the thought of their flight home that day is still nagging in the back of her head.

"Ready to get home today?" she sighs. "What time is our flight again?"

She really should stop relying on other people to keep her schedule straight for her.

"What I told you we weren’t going home yet?" Waverly asks.

Nicole gives her a confused look. She may not know every detail, but she's pretty sure they had a flight scheduled for today.

"What?"

"What if I let Rosita go ahead of us and I changed our flights so we can stay in Chicago for a couple more days and explore a little?" the brunette asks.

Nicole's eyes light up at the thought.

"Really?"

Waverly nods, a huge smile on her face.

"I know the last part of the tour wasn't exactly what we had planned or expected," she explains. "But I know how much you were looking forward to Chicago, so I figured we could make the best of it now."

"You did that for me?" Nicole asks.

Waverly nods. "There's a lot of things I'd do for you," she says.

Nicole smiles and pushes toward the brunette, capturing her lips again. She deepens the kiss right away, unable to control it anymore. She feels the love inside of her building up and pouring out of her with every moment she spends with Waverly. She's not sure how she ever got so lucky, but she's determined to do everything in her power to keep this woman in her life.

They eventually do get out of bed, but not for another hour or so. She loves waking up slow with Waverly, something she hasn't been able to do in weeks. They find a small diner for breakfast and spend the rest of the day exploring the city. There's no agenda, no rules, no publicist breathing down her neck.

It's just Nicole and Waverly, it's simple and it's perfect.


End file.
